She seemed so interested, now says not ready for a relationship, I'm so confused?

I met this girl over a month ago (we're both college sophomores), and what started as just meeting at a party turned into so much more. We connected so well and so quickly and told each other how much we liked one another. We never really discussed being in a relationship but perhaps things were naturally headed that direction, as we did discuss that neither of us were really seeing other people. So as I said everything was going good, until out of the blue, she just went cold on me and said she wasn't sure about being in a relationship. And we didn't see each other for almost two weeks.

During this stretch she reinitiated the contact and said she missed me, so we continued texting and then I asked her to meet up for coffee, to which she seemed to be excited in her reply, saying "yes! it doesn't have to be coffee, it can be anything, it's been too long!" Then when we actually did meet up she seemed tired and disinterested and we briefly talked about things, and she said she just doesn't like the feeling of being obligated to see someone. I tried to tell her that I don't want her to feel like I'm an obligation, or something she is being forced into and that I'd still like to see her and if she needed space that I was fine with that. And kind of switched topics after that because she wasn't really keeping eye contact and seemed annoyed (although I could've been reading too deep into things) and as we said goodbye, we hugged and she said she'd text me.

I'm just so confused because things were so good, and we always had fun and enjoyed being together, and she said she really liked me and cared about me and would talk about things in the future and mention me in those plans (even met her parents) and then now it doesn't make sense how could she be so into me and then now not seem interested at all. Does it seem there are other factors (not me) that are legitimately bothering her? or is it probably that she somehow lost interest in me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I just don't think she's as into you as you perceive. But it's really irrelevant - as are her motivations. What matters is what you're going to do about it? Continue to hang on and wait for her or move on.


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What Girls Said 1

  • I'm someone who's afraid of commitment and so for guys I'm lukewarm about, I try to be enthusiastic but it only lasts so long, hence her going cold and seemingly annoyed. If I was really into a guy, I'd let him know about my issues and reassure him I liked him. If you're into her, you'll have to ask her straight up what's going on, otherwise you won't get anywhere.

    • I just don't get why she would be so happy to see me, if she weren't interested anymore? She said she would text me two days ago, still hasn't. Is she figuring things out. Should I just ask her straight up, or wait? I hate not knowing the reason for what's going on.

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    • should i wait and see if she doesn't reply first, or just cut to the chase and get it over with

    • You could wait a bit, but don't lose the courage to do it!

What Guys Said 0

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