Should I text her, after her failure to reply last time?

- I asked this girl out (in person), she said yes.
- I text her to confirm date and details
- She takes two days to reply said if we should ask friends to join
- I replied I wanted it to be just us
- She never replied to my text
- Having assumed that she'd lost interest, I saw her 10 days after the text and she said can we hangout soon and sorry for not replying
- Went on date
- She's been busy with an exam that she wanted to finish before doing anything else, but that she wanted to hangout again soon.

Now I want to meet her Friday morning for coffee. However I won't be seeing her in person before then.
I want to send her a text, but given what happened last time, I'm 'scared' she won't reply.
And if she didn't reply, should I said her another text asking if she got it?

Update to people who think she's stringing me along:

I agree, she could be. Though I know she's only 18 (I'm 21), and seems quite inexperienced with this, seems nervous and is shy.
I also know she has been crazy stressed with this final exam.


Most Helpful Guy

  • dont go for it, depending on the age, if a girl likes or is interested in you she will make that 100% clear to you.

    Dont waste your time on this girl

    • She has made it clear though. In our interactions, her body language, our interests, etc, etc... it was just the response time with her text.

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    • Thanks for most helpful dude! :)

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What Girls Said 4

  • Honestly she probs wanted to bring her friends in an attempt to friendzone you. You can find someone better though

  • red flag. She is not that into you...

    • thought that at first, but we really had a great time ice skating, had great conversations, laughed, had fun and were singing to songs all the way home.

      I think she is just really inexperienced and nervous, and I know she had been crazy stressed about this exam.

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    • Call me crazy, I don't think that would be a bad thing. I'd rather that then lose her friendship.
      I'd never asked a girl out before, and part of the reason why I hadn't was because I was scared of ruining friendships.

    • I like to have guy friends before I start the more romantic approach but eventually I do. I won't get stuck being the person that has to listen to their bad romantic experiences... So step it up.

  • She is stringing you along. She's just not that into you.

    • I thought that at first, but we really had a great time ice skating, had great conversations, laughed, had fun and were singing to songs all the way home.

      I think she is just really inexperienced and nervous, and I know she had been crazy stressed about this exam.

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    • Agrojag: I'm not too fussed really as we have both been busy, and that's the reason for it. Though if this becomes a recurring pattern, when we are both not busy, then I will start asking questions.

    • @asker: she can still have a great time with you and enjoy time with you while strining you along. Some girls are just evil like that. And Agrojag makes valid points. I'm sorry man, but there are plenty of other ladies who will appreciate you out there. Don't be all hung up over this one girl.

  • So why text her, when you can actually call her? Have you tried that?

    • Because tomorrow in at work with no break and can't call, and she will be in college during the day.

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    • ObscuredBeyond: Her test was yesterday, so I'll thought I'd text her later.

    • So call her when she's available! Texting can be impersonal and you did mention that you guys are great in person so since you won't be seeing her, the next best thing is an actual phone call.

What Guys Said 4

  • At any point in these proceedings have you employed the use of such phrases as "go on a date" or "go out with me" or something similar? And by similar I don't mean "hang out." Have you actually explicitly made your feelings known?

    You said you asked her out and that later you went on a date. Was it actually a date? There seems to be a huge disconnect between you calling to confirm the time of a date and her asking if you should bring friends, and then between your saying "just us" and her not ever texting back.

    Fast forward 10 days when you happen to see her in person. If you hadn't run into her, would you ever have heard from her? If you think so, that's fine. You know better than any of us on here. But the most interesting part is this: She says that "we can hangout soon and sorry for not replying." Then you say you went on a date. Did you go on a date or did you hangout? Also, if she was really sorry don't you think she probably would have let you know that before running into you?

    Are you scared that she won't reply about Friday morning or are you scared that your date wasn't a date?

    Again you know better than we will. From an outsider's perspective, I think you can see that we think there's a lot of suspect activity going on here that isn't exactly encouraging. But maybe she is just that awkward/inexperienced/stressed. You'll know by Friday (if you ever ask her out). But for your own sake, I'd say that you need to stop going by little signs here and there and just ask straight out what's going on. Not clearing it up one way or the other is a lose lose. Either you delay the start of some kind of relationship or you just prolong this grey area.

  • I agree with poppunk sadly she is telling the truth dude one thing I have learned form being rejected so many times from women is that when a women is stringing you along the final exams thing trust me will be her only really good excuse and its not a good sign man when they hesitate she is doing this to you cause women like to have power over the men and she likes the attention women like to be worshiped you are just another number to her. Do you know how I know? As soon as you said she replied in the text can I bring my friends too that was it I knew right then and there and if you keep bringing up this date thing again she will finally say I am not interested in an aggressive type of way or she will nit pick on some small little mistake that you made in one of your texts trust me man I know this cause I have been there and done that.

    • Spot on.

    • ... yeah but then I said I wanted to spend time with just her. Then when I saw her she apologised for not replying, and that she wants to hang out, just the two of us.

    • so that has happened to me with this one girl and she said that exact same thing to me she would keep canceling and saying sorry until I kept pushing it without realizing it that she got a bf a couple days after and when I confronted her why chose him over me she just called me a creep. If it actually does happen tell me then I will believe it this is why its called stringing along bro.

  • If a young girl is into you, she'll send you 50+ texts a day.
    Don't worry about this girl.

  • No. Don't send anything. Girls take texting a lot more seriously than guys do. If you start sending too many, she'll start coming to ridiculous conclusions that you're "needy" or "creepy". She doesn't really sound worth pursuing, if I'm honest and she doesn't sound all that interested. Maybe start looking elsewhere but definitely don't send too many texts.

    • Even if it's a text about meeting up?
      And I haven't been sending many, so this can't hurt?

      Re, not interested: Thought that at first, but we really had a great time ice skating, had great conversations, laughed, had fun and were singing to songs all the way home.

      I think she is just really inexperienced and nervous, and I know she had been crazy stressed about this exam.

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    • @gingerrr: Probably. Although, the fact he's sent nothing doesn't bode well for his interest in you. I've made the mistake of over-texting because I just didn't really care, and girls always read way more into that than was ever intended. Maybe he's just being cautious, but I think he would've attempted some kind of communication if he was really interested.

    • @gingerrr: I know your pain. The fell head over heels for the girl I referred to. She showed "signs" and everyone was convinced she liked me. None of it mattered in the end. You'll always see the signs you want to see. I think being direct and to the point as soon as possible is the only way of knowing.