I never make it to second date, when I want one?

What would make not want to see a girl again? I know it's a bit general but I have no idea where it went wrong.

It happened twice, so maybe never is a bit of a strong term, but I think it's a pattern. We've been out on a date, I thought it went well and by the end of it both of them said something like "let's do this again sometime" but then nothing. I didn't hear from them and when I messaged them one didn't reply the other did but after talking a bit it was obvious he wasn't interested.

I don't get it, why say lets go out again, if you don't want to?

And then I've been on dates that I thought went terrible or just not good and those guys ask for a second date all the time. What's wrong with me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Nothing is wrong with you, it happens to everyone. If only twice that's not bad at all. Guys say that cuz they don't want to hurt your feelings. Even though it actually makes it worse in the long run. I've been told that too then it didn't happen. One time a girl was right up front and direct and said I like you and we can be friends but I don't see us going any further. I was a little shocked at first but now I still like her and I really respect her and we are friends.

    • I don't get it though, they could have just said nothing. It wouldn't have even occurred to me to say something like that and I did want to go out again

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    • well thanks, I guess. It's just frustrating

    • What turns me off is over dramatic about EVERYTHING, immaturity, and being judgmental.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You said at the end you do get asked on second dates, just not from two guys who you wanted one with.

    What constitutes 'going well' in your mind?

    • well it's a first date, so just having enough things to talk about and having a good conversation

    • If there's no chemistry/flirting or signs of physical attraction, I'd be pretty lukewarm about a second date too, unless it was a very quick date (just a coffee etc.)

    • ya it was just a coffee.

      I guess I'm not really good at flirting tho, so that may be it. I just haven't really been dating a lot before

What Girls Said 1

  • Do you talk about yourself more than half the time because that drives men away?

    • no I don't think so, I'm not that talkative, they both were, I think it was roughly even, maybe they talked a bit more

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    • ya I don't know, I thought they were pretty nice, but I guess there is no point in crying over spilled milk. I was just looking for things to do better the next time

    • There ya go!! :) :P :D