why are firm dating standards wrong?

i don't get it, why do people get offended if somebody only like tall guys, or blonde women, or women of a given race and/or ethnicity?

how does it bother others if people date who they like or feel comfortable with?


Most Helpful Girl

  • They aren't "wrong", but dating standards based on appearances alone are pretty stupid. My boyfriend's friend was describing what kind of girl he was looking for one day. Described her height, build, hair color, etc. I responded with "She sounds smart" just to point out he hadn't listed a single personality characteristic which would *actually* matter in terms of compatibility. Attraction is important. Compatibility is important too.

    The girl he ended up falling for looked nothing like the girl he described. If he'd been rigid on those 'standards' he never would have started dating her in the first place.

    • I wanted to add something. Its not all the girls who didn't fit the friend's description who would have missed out if he'd stuck to it. It's him. The standards aren't stupid because it means you aren't giving other people a chance with you. They are stupid because it means you aren't giving yourself a chance with other people. But it's not 'wrong' because it's your decision. Nobody else is being hurt by it so you're free to be as picky as you want.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • It just seems silly to eliminate entire populations of people based on arbitrary physical traits. How random.

    • nobody has an obligation to date anybody. You act as if you're personally offended by others' dating traits.

    • Show All
    • What the HELL are you talking about? What childhood guru? I don't need the world to be nice to me, I just need you to shut up. So please, PLEASE, shut up.

    • i don't care lol.. leave me be, kindly.

  • There's a difference between having a preference and not giving any other option a chance. Having a preference is normal everyone has them, but once you're not even the slightest bit open to other types of people I think that's when it starts to concern others.

    As for me, I think like what you like but don't be close minded.

    • meh, i guess it's just different beliefs we have.

      If I knew a person have fixed tastes, it wouldn't offend me, even if I got turned down. Everybody gets turned down, so meh, I guess others do as they do in life, it's not my business.

What Guys Said 1

  • It is wrong because it applies stereotypes to individual who may or may not adhere to those stereotypes. It is lazy. Also too many people like to hide behind the word "preference" instead of being truthful. Where I'm from when you prefer something to somthing eles it means that all items are in the running whereas when a lot of people say " I prefer" they really mean. "if she isn't ABC race or he isn't XYZ feet tall then they must fuck right off"