Can you guys tell me a joke?
What Guys Said 7
Below is my long, yet, hilarious joke.
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"
Why was the holocaust just a misunderstanding?
Because Hitler said, "glass of juice," not, "gas the Jews."
I'm probably going to hell for this.
Where did the girl go after the explosion?
That guy wanted to take a taxi, then counted his money, hadn't enough, proposed his watch to pay, asked for credit. No way, said the driver and locked his door.
The guy had o walk.
The day after he saw three taxis waiting, went to the first one. Proposed $50 and said that's for you, if you suck me off. No way, said the driver and locked his door.
He went to the next taxi Proposed $50 and said that's for you, if you suck me off. No way, said the driver and locked his door.
The third was the one who had turned him down the day before. He proposed $50 for the drive.
That's, OK, what do I have to do? Just drive me and wave the $50 bill to your friends when we leave.
And they left.
Why can't T-Rex' clap their hands?
My love life.
What was the last thing to go through the head of a person who jumped off the World Trade Center on 9/11?
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