Need a pick me up - pls share a joke?
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Van Gogh walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Do you want a drink?" Van Gogh says, "No, I already got one ear."
An engineer dies and goes to heaven, he is greeted by saint peter who lets him into heaven, a few months go by, and saint peter calls up the engineer and tells him, well we made an unfortunately mistake, apparently you are supposed to be in hell, the engineer regrettably says alright, a few months in hell goes by god asks satin, how are things down there? Satin replies, oh they've never been better! Ever since the engineer came down here he fixed all the air conditioners the lights and the elevators, it's great down here we are having a blast, god says, well that's not right he doesn't belong down there in hell, god tells satin to return the engineer, and satin replies I am not giving him back, ever since he's got here it's been practically heaven down here in hell, god replies how dare you, if you don't send him back up I'll sue you, and the devil replies, where are you going to find a lawyer up there in heaven?
Roses are red, violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van
What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels
I am gonna block you.
If you were a vegetable you would be a cutecumber.
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