What do you think about my video I made? I was criticized for it being to movie like?

I am studying media like a one year community college. But the study quality really low. So most people in my class film with there phones , but I film with dslr camera. My teacher criticized me for making to artistic to much movie like. That I care to much about small details in a film. By his oppinion i should care less about details use more fast motion, less movie like basically amature level home made.

Where most people at my class make very amature videos

Can you please give me your opinion about this video? Here is the link.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYr3GbubhgM

Of course i don't think its perfect i did make some mistakes with screen size and had to use my old footages in a dream.

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