1. It's my heritage
For as long as I can remember, whenever I've said my full name, I am asked how it is properly pronounced and what the story of my last name is. It gives me a connection to the world I never want to lose. My last name is Northern Dutch. In the Netherlands, my last name is very common. It's like the Dutch Version of "Smith." However if anyone has my last name, I am most definitely related to them in one way or another. My last name has deep roots with Scandinavian history. I have many ancestors, both men and women, who were Viking warriors. Which reflects my DNA, as I am 20% Irish, 20% Scandinavian, and 60% Western European. So you could say I come from a family of strong women.
2. It's been my identity for the last 20 years
My parents spent months coming up with a name and it flows so nicely. Point is, I just never saw myself with any other name. If a guy can't see that my last name is just as important as his, then I'm not marrying him.
3. It's just a custom that I have no interest in
If anyone else wants to change their last name because they are traditionalists or whatever reason, then they can go ahead. Personally, I am not and have never been a traditionalist. Just like how I have no interest in making sure that my wedding dress is white. I would like my wedding dress to be red actually.
4. I want to be a successful operating room nurse and I would not like to rebuild my reputation from scratch
I am currently working as a neurosurg CNA and I plan to be an operating room nurse. The best medical professionals started from the bottom and worked their way up. I think it's a good thing that people know that I started from the bottom, it's definitely very humbling. I got my start in the medical field as a hospital volunteer and now I'm a CNA. Next thing to work my way up to is a nurse apprentice. Plus the hospital feels similarly. The reason they hired me with little experience as a CNA was because they want to be the company that I got my start and the company where I got my "end goal dream job" as an operating room nurse. They love when people have worked there for years and years.
5. I don't want a new last name because I don't need a new beginning
My life doesn't begin or reset when I get married.
6. It doesn't bother me that our names won't match
I don't care if my future husband and I don't have matching last names. I'm not that insecure. Let people talk. I don't care.
7. It's a big hassle
Everything from email, to drivers license, passport, professional name, social security card, reintroducing myself, etc. I plan on having a simple courthouse wedding anyways, so why should changing my last name be the biggest hassle of getting married? I don't want anything fancy, nothing that is a huge hassle, just love.
8. Because it's my decision
If someone does want to change their name, then they are free to do so. They won't get any judgement from me, but whatever they decide it should be their own choice.
9. It has no effect on the marriage
If a relationship is so fragile that it rides on top of whether the woman changes her name or not, it wasn't going to last anyways.
I don't ever plan on having children, so that won't be an issue. I already know people are going to ask, "then why else would you get married if you don't plan on changing your name?" This is going to sound so cheesy but the answer is, love.
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