Growing Up As The "Ugly" Sister

Do you have a sibling who seems to always attract attention? You know, they always have admirers and have no problem finding a boyfriend/girlfriend, while you on the other hand... well, you're cool, you guess.

Well honey, you are not alone.

Growing Up As The "Ugly" Sister

I, too, have an older sister that was deemed by what seems like the whole world as pretty, hot, gorgeous, and pretty much everything that I wasn't. It didn't matter where we went, she would always get looks and comments from several guys, young and old. And any guy she wanted, she got.

She would pick me up from class sometimes and all I would hear from my guy friends is, "Your sister's hot. Does she have a boyfriend?" and all kinds of other nonsense. I get it, compared to me, she was a bombshell. And she never let me forget it. She loved pointing out my flaws every chance she got. Whether it be about my hair, my face, my body hair, etc.

Now I was a skinny kid up until about 15-16, and I can recall her making fun of my lack of a butt as early as 11 years old. I didn't know 11 year olds were supposed to be voluptuous. 🙄

In hindsight, I truly believe she got off on being the "hot" sister. And now I realize how much all of her negative comments affected me. That doesn't mean that I think I'm hideous, but I always have those moments of: "I wish I was gorgeous/beautiful" or "I wish I had a nice butt" and so on and so forth. That feeling of not being good enough, it's not a nice feeling and I would love if it just went away, but unfortunately, it doesn't quite work like that.

Well, I think that's all I have to say about that. It's not very long, but who cares? This isn't me throwing a pity party or anything, this is something that has just been on my mind, so I thought I'd get it off my chest and share my experience as the "ugly" sister.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • well I can't tell but I have had some similar issue in the past, even now I guess it must've come from my parents and some random people telling me I look meh whilst whenever I got a compliment it didn't have much value/weight. I don't look bad but I can't find the confidence on this behalf I draw confidence from the way I am as a human being

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Oh believe me I understand what you are saying. And also trying so hard but never being good enough and always being compared to my older siblings.
    And when they mess up they don't get into much trouble but if I did the same thing id be in so much trouble.
    And my family members pointing out every flaw in me that it has caused me serious damage.
    I understand how shitty it feels to grow up being the ugly sister... sadly it has given me low self esteem, I mean if they didn't rub it in my face and point out my flaws id get over it and wouldn't really think about it that much but they did. but whatever I guess.

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What Guys Said 27

  • Wow thanks for sharing. While I never really dealt with my siblings being more attractive, I do often compare my success or lack therof to them which has caused some depression and anxiety in me. My little sister in particular seems almost like the golden child compared to the rest of us (I have 3 other siblings) and my parents definitely don’t shy away from expressing that. So in a way I can relate being treated or seen as the lesser sibling.

    I find you attractive looking by the way 😉

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  • it sucks that people can be so mean. My mother and older sister told me I was the dog and my sister treated me like one too. I was just something to make them happy doing whatever they wanted me to do. My sister would come grab me by my shirt and to clean the bathroom didn't matter what I was doing and if I didn't go when she wanted me to she would beat me up and my mother let her. they would call me little doggy. I hate them both. I bet you are nice looking.

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  • Hmm. Sibling rivalries can be tough. I am a guy, so I have no idea how it feels like; but, I do have a sibling and understand how it feels when your sibling gets all the attention. Don't compare yourself to her as everyone has their shortcomings. It is better to be loved than just wanted, so you'll find love (s), but she may not if she is as shallow as you describe her. Just be you that's enough.

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  • I grew up in a different situation. My father raised me by myself and my mom had a few daughters. They're mostly grown now, middle and high school age. We've gotten back in touch and it seems like they still idolize me in some way.
    I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

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  • I seen your face before on here and you're far from ugly hun. You cute to me.

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  • Ahh, I feel so happy to have been an only child sometimes...

    But you can turn the tables if you get a boyfriend/husband that's way hotter than hers... it'll be a payback that can last a lifetime and make her rethink about your attractiveness

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  • Don't worry, my dad used to bitch that I wasn't more like my older sister, and I'm a boy.

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  • Just seriously disfigure your sister and hey, just like that, the tables have turned. It's common sense, does anyone around here use their brains?

    All I'm saying is that you people put a moral spin to everything, no, just take a problem and apply the solution.

    DONE.

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  • A Chihuahua. I hate those stupid dogs.

    My mom was the middle child too. She has always felt unwanted by her family.

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  • Everybody in my family has fair skin lime Steph Curry, and Klay Thompson, and I've always felt different, ugly and I just had a rough life overall

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  • Everyone in my family is considered generally attractive, but I'd guess my little brother takes the medal.

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  • yah I know that feel, all my older brothers had girls chasing them, so I'm kinda the ugly sister too😂

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  • Thanks for sharing your MyTake appreciate reading it.

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  • I doubt you are "ugly".

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    • I'm average.

    • I doubt that you're average. I'd bet you're very cute and would be like a lead in a Miyazki anime ! haha

      That said reading some comments you've made to me and other's over time , you're not an ugly person. You have a good humour , a brain and a cheeky streak... these are all key.

  • I was the hot sister

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  • Interesting myTake

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  • Thank god I was born the hot sister.

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  • I am the ugly sister

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    • it's good that you can admit that, a lot of bigots might push you down but never forget you're more of a woman than they'll ever be.

  • I was the ugly sister too 😔😝

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  • Interesting...

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  • it musts uck

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  • Thanks for sharing

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  • I, too, am the ugly sister

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  • That chick ain't pretty.

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  • dont know

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  • Sometimes it can be harder on an older sister who's little sister has suddenly grown into a hottie. My ex girlfriend got seriously jealous of her younger sister when just in time for summer at 15 she went from being a skinny tomboy to filling out in all the right places. After my ex dumped me i ended up with her little sister which increased her jealously to new levels.

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    • Holy crap! You actually ended up dating the younger sister? LOL! your ex must've HATED you!

    • Show All
    • @BoobMan she's a peach. Everything is better with her. She actually makes me dinner and takes me cookies that she baked to my work when she's free.

    • That's awesome! Feel free to add me if you'd like to discuss further.

  • you are fine no worries

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What Girls Said 11

  • I like the meme you chose it is so funny. My sister and I don't have this problem, we're both ugly so we just support each other in our ugliness ignoring the fact that we are both probably going to be single for life Lol

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  • It's never fun to be in anyone's shadow. It really seems like your sister got off on what she was doing. I'm wondering though if perhaps she didn't feel all that great about herself either, since people who really have high self-esteem usually don't do that. Maybe one day when you guys are both older, you might have an interesting discussion about this. Once you hear her perspective, you never know, things might change.

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  • I doubt you're ugly. I have a classmate who is skinny. Her elder sister is curvy and she also roasts her for having nothing in her body. Don't take it seriously!

    Some people say that I look way better than my elder sister... and it makes me wanna punch their faces. My sister is the most amazing woman that I know! Besides, she's 11 years older than me and it's absolutely ridiculous to compare me with her.

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  • that must be hard.

    i'm an only child so i never had to deal with this. i have 2 older half brothers who i only saw on special occasions but i know that they both had a constant succession of girlfriends and later wives and even groupies (he was in a rock band) but i didn't compare myself to them.

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  • wasn't the ugly sister, but i have friends who deal with this. the hotter sister gets to skate through life, but at some point, maybe 10 years, the ugly sister who learned it was necessary to work harder and treat people nicer to get a fraction of the attention, she ends up having her life together sooner. the older sister who was busy being entitled for the same 10 years, falls behind, and then wishes she had gotten her shit together. when she begs the "ugly" sister for help, it usually must come with an apology. it all balances out in the end (usually). cheer up!

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  • Im the uncool unpopular sister, basically it is the same as the ugly sister but personality based rather than looks based.

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  • :( I'm sorry. I'm the fuck-up sister. It sucks.

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  • Sounds like you were talking about me.

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  • Lmao I’m the ugly sister too

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  • My younger sister is "the pretty one" and she knows it too. She would always brag about being thr prettiest of all of her friends and never had issues meeting men. However, her personality catches up with her mighty quick. She goes through friends like socks and guys don't usually stick around long. When I broke up with my ex I dropped 50 pounds and colored my hair, she accused me of trying to "one up" her.

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  • yes i do

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