I am the youngest of 6 ! We had to put my dad in a nursing home near us ! My sister , brother and I tried to take care of him and our blind and disabled mom at home too ! However while we were all sleeping , my dad would take off on foot and run down a busy street in back of where we live to go to some restaurant 2 miles away from home ! The police caught him and he went on police record know as the wanderer ! So we had to put him in a nursing home to keep him safe ! He was taken good care of there but also gained weight ! For some strange reason he was always skinny but gained weight in the nursing home : D ! Do not feel to bad about putting a parent in a nursing home ! Cry if you want for it is a very difficult thing to do ! For it is like you do not love them , want them around you anymore and that the nursing home is a prison to put them in and for what crime? It is not though ! If you have to put them in one then you have to but make sure and visit them and bring them home every weekend ! Also make sure the nursing home is the best , well staffed and cleanest place you can put your loved one in ! When you go to see these nursing homes make sure and go in with an open mind and remember , you will be meeting all kinds of people from the staff to those who live there ! It will be messy and there will be noises for some who live in these facilities need to be there for they are on medications that can get them to behave in away that may scare you ! No one is in there to intentionally harm you or any one ! There are employees there who are alert and will help you if the need arises ! The one my dad was in was staffed with such sweet people that they allowed me to take my dog in there on a leash ! She would jump on the bed my dad was in and he said - that dern dog - ! He loved dogs too ! You can not beat that ! Most nursing homes want there place to look and feel as homey as possible for their residence sake ! They have church there , you can plant a garden and do a lot of other things there too ! Thanks
No I wouldn’t because I don’t really care about my parents. I seriously doubt that I’d even find out if they’re sick... i only speak to my dads side of the family and not even the dad himself. I know my mom and dad don’t speak ever. So there’d be a slim chance of me knowing anything about them.
I'd try not too. Firstly its not what they want, secondly it costs a hell of a lot of money (why blow the inheritance...)It will be my choice, i have power of attorney for money and health if they can't look after their own affairs. Ultimately, i'd discuss with siblings. A home would be final choice
Sometimes it is the best place for them. It really depends on the situation and your money and time. For my dad I might consider doing this because he simply can't handle being healthy by himself on his own. He is young but he is very much circling between death my suicide or alcohol :(
Have an opinion?
No I would not. I have read some horror stories and it's the same reason why I wouldn't put my kids in day care if I had any. You just can not trust everyone and it's heartbreaking 😢💔
The nursing homes here in America are known for being atrocious. If I absolutely could not help them, I would place them in one that I searched diligently for and see them every week. My mother told me she doesn't want to be in one though so I'd likely respect her wishes.
It has been a Sad Scenario in my Own Family where Yes... My grandma had to go because of cancer to Get the Best Care.Dad is Dying of Emphysema, And if he feels he cannot Live up ther anymore, He will Go himself and My Sister would make those arrangements.no One wants this to Happen Here Dear, But HELP IS NEAR. xx
Beautifully Done, hun.Tell coolbreeze he does'nt have parents, Just an aunt and uncle. xx
Never. I refuse to have my parents live in a nursing home. When my dad had a stroke he had to be cared for but he’s better now. My mom had to work and I had school but we took turns.
What if you only had one parent no family nobody to help you with your parent who needs constant care needed constant care and you have to work and are also married @pink2000
Then I would have to hire so done if I could afford it
Then if you have no choice then you have to do what you have to.
This is a difficult decision. I would try my best and get out of my way not to.If my parents needed help and someone to take care of them 24/7 I'd rather hire someone to do so and be there as much as I can myself.Nursing homes in my experience are all nice and warm when you visit but some of them treat people in the worst way. I wouldn't want that for my parents... They are the people who raised me and cared for me. I wouldn't allow anyone to treat them like rubbish.
I personally could never do that to my parents. It was absolutely heartbreaking when my half-siblings overruled my dad and I to put my mum in one. I know for a fact that it contributed toward her early death recently because she was perfectly healthy when she was with my dad and me.
If I felt like it was genuinely too much work for me too take on then yes, I'd visit them plenty and make sure they're comfortable but I dont think I'd have the time to take care of them full time.
Thank goodness my parents are not at that point yet. They are still doing well living with my siblings. My grandma ended up in a nursing home. Back to child like.I think its ineviatable... including us :(
Nope. I would just hire a nurse to take care of him at his house. My father really likes and enjoys solitary life at his house and loves to surrounds himself with younger people when he's out. A nursing home full of old people would definitely make him depressed.
Honestly, I would. My parents were almost middle aged when they had me. So by the time I actually start enjoying life, they'll be much older and might need care, since I'm an only child, I don't want to have to take care of them. Yeah it's selfish and I sound like a horrible person but it is what it is.
Speaking as an Only, you sound ungrateful.
@Guardian45 I'm sure I probably do
I hope you find peace
@Guardian45 I feel fine. I just think it would be said to be 30 and have to take care of my parents
True. But your parents brought you into this world, and you owe them a debt that can NEVER be repaid. 'Honor Thy Parents'.
@Guardian45 I think that's very sad. I didn't ask to be here. I was an "accident" I wouldn't be here if my mom had the money to get an abortion.
So that is your reason for being ungrateful? Did they not raise you up? Do you owe them nothing?
@Guardian45 I completely understand what you're saying. I just don't want to take care of them.
I don't understand. Peace Out.
@Guardian45 if you wouldn't mind, I'm curious to see what your opinion would be on this question As an only child, do you think it's selfish to not give your parents grandchildren? ↗
I’d really try not to, I’ve actually planned for the possibility that f having either or both parents live with us. there is a point where that becomes impossible though. So you get the best possible situation you can.
definitely not my rent won't go up because I have an extra person living in my house they gave me life it's the least I could do there are services where when you are working a nurse can take care of your parents
I moved back home to take care of my mom , she has dementia
How do you work? and what if you were married?
I have a lawn service , and I am still single. If I were married I would make deal with her that we would take care of her mother next
Factors as health, location, financial situation, etc are playing big role in this kind of decision. I see no problem in nursing home if it provides good care and is affordable
We should have, but we couldn't. My Mom, more than me, paid a heavy price. It was gut-wrenching waiting for him to die, but he was happier for a short while and we got more time with him than we might have. RIP Dad.
My mother died relatively young and my father had plenty of money, so I never had to confront that choice.
I love this picture. No, I couldn't do that. I could easily put my grandma there though because she's batshit crazy (uncertafiable).
If it was the best option for their confort and safety yes.
Sometimes a parent is in such condition, that they can't be taken care of at home. In such situations an ALF or nursing home may be needed.
It's not ideal at all and if I could avoid it I would. But if I had no other option, then yes I would put them there
It's a real difficult question, thankfully I have never had to make, I personally think I would be worried about them if they were not with me, so I could protect them.
If I’m not able to take care of them because I’m in another state or country then yeah I would
It's a difficult situation if it's what's best for them in the long run to give them the care and social life they need and not getting at home.
Hell No. Shame on such people who do that. Parents raise their children sacrificing everything and that's how you repay them. Shit
Hopefully I’ll never have to face that decision. I’d rather not if I don’t have to.
Yes i had no choice the hospital sent my Mother to oneshe had terminal cancer but sadly she spent 1 week inone than passed away all sudden.
I think so maybe. My own family, my children and husband will always come first.
My parents dies before I had to make such a decision, so I don't really know.
Considering my mom is genetically likely to get Alzheimer's, yeah.
Ya, that may not mean much. One of the main Alzheimer researchers has all four of the markers and has not expressed the disease.
I can't wait to put them in a home... or if they did come to my place they will be my janitors
yes if its the best option
No i would never
My mother... yes
I might have to with my mom
As a last resort
Yes, I would.
No I couldn't
Yes if they are beyond my help
Only if it was last option.
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