Gossip is called a "social currency" for a reason. And it's most likely an evolutionary left-over. When we evolved, men competed primarily for resources, food and mates, which is why men tend to be a lot more open and direct with their conflicts and confrontations, while women primarily competed through social status. After all, if you don't have the physical strength to beat someone in a fight, the best way to get ahead of them is to make them appear less likeable in the eyes of the herd.But I think most of what you said can be summed up in one problem: Men automatically see each other as competiton, and women automatically see each other as competition, rather than people they should actively cooperate with and work alongside.
Do you think it's the primary or first way people see their same sex?I think if one compares opposite sex to oneself, that is less likely to be seen as competitive, but it could also be seen as oppositional. When things are good, they're really good, and when they're bad, they're really bad, right.I don't know. I flip flop between cynicism and hopefullness. There's so much friction, so many problems with all types of human relationships. But also, we are all part of a community, and are a resource to one another. And good for some levity sometimes. This lifestyle we have created allows for a lot of autonomy, but we are rarely fully independent. And life is so boring in isolation, without others. Even though you want to kick them to the curb sometimes. Infuriating but interesting.
I don't know wwhat I could say as a response to that other than mentioning how we have created a society and culture that our brains are not prepared for. Our technology and social environment has evolved without our mentality and natural instincts being able to keep up. We have a problem with obesity because people eat when they've simply got nothing else to do, which stems from an evolutionary root where whenever we had food available, we HAD to eat, because we could never know when we would able to get our hands on it again. So now, when we're bored, even though we don't NEED to eat, we still do.That's how I see relationships and social bonds as well. We want so much out of them that our brains just aren't able to give us. We expect to be able to form specific kind of bonds with people because we have been taught from a young age that it's what we should do, but at the same time, our brains don't see it that way.
When it comes to competition, a lot of it is biological. But a secure man/woman would be able to see someone of the same sex as competition when needed, and as a teammate when needed. The problem is, though, that most people don't KNOW how to actually get to the stage of being that "secure" person. Because we're never taught how to actually think about ourselves in comparison to others.We're just taught "You should never compare yourself to others, just be happy with who you are". And while that is a good idea in theory, it's not possible in practice, because like I said, our brains are still primitive. What would be MORE useful is if we were taught how to compare ourselves to others in a healthy and realistic perspective, and how to use those comparisons to improve on ourselves rather than disliking others. For example, if you're jealous about how great someone else's body is, you should be able to use that as a tool to motivate yourself to improve your OWN body, rather than putting that jealousy and hatred directly onto them.This became a very long rant, but I hope I got my general point across.
Ever seen the documentary 'Surviving Progress'? I think you might enjoy it. It delves into many of these same things we're discussing here.It's one of my absolutely top favourite documentaries I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot. Many are slow, longwinded, and don't cover many novel ideas but instead repackage and reheash. This does not suffer from any of those. I even downloaded the transcript in PDF. I've quoted from it before.www.youtube.com/watch
I will watch it when I get the time, as it looks a bit long for my stupid ADHD brain to focus on. XD
Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions
The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!