I am in my 30s but my mom still doesn't want me to move out. Any suggestions what to tell him?

[piano]

I am 33, but still living with my mom. I want to move my own house but she doesn't want me to move out. I don't want to hurt her but what should I do?

[misogynistic_pig]

It's understandable that you want to be independent and start your own life, but it's also important to be respectful and understanding of your mother's concerns.

If you still don't feel comfortable talking to her about your desire to move, you can start by asking her some questions to better understand her concerns.

You could ask her why she wants you to stay home, and if there are any specific issues that are troubling her.

Maybe she's worried about your financial well-being, or maybe she's worried about being home alone.

If you can better understand her concerns, you will be able to address them more effectively.

If your mother is concerned about your financial well-being, you could tell her that you have been saving money to move and that you have investigated safe and affordable housing options.

If her concern is that she will be lonely at home, you could tell her that you will still visit her and that you will continue to be close.

It is important to maintain open and honest communication with your mother, and to listen to her concerns with respect and empathy.

Over time, you can work together to find a solution that meets both of your needs and concerns.

[RockyHammock]

Dawg he probably knows exactly why, but doesn't want the world to know by airing the dirty laundry.

OP, just move out - your life is yours alone. The only parent that wants their kid to give up their life for them is a shotty parent.

[OfMiceandMen]

Is it just you and your mom? If so, I can see her not wanting to see you go and live alone.

I gather once you move out though, she will be okay and know that it is for the best. It is just the initial shock of you not being there.

You may want to visit a little more frequently at the beginning so it isn't as much of a transition for her. Maybe go pick her up and bring her over to your new place once you are settled.👌

[Sour-rose]

get your shi and leave. She'll be fine. "Well sour-rose, that's kinda rude don't-" Shaddup.

You and I are in the same boat. She may not want you to leave but you MUST fly on your own at some point. Just trying to reason with her is just going to waste more time of you not swimming in the pool by yourself and make her strengthen her resolve to make you see her way. Best thing I can offer is to do you- just you. Find a house, dip, and come and visit sometimes. But trying to get her to comply won't be helping either of you

[Anonymous]

You can find a house near the area your mom lives so you can check on her often.. maybe that’s better
But voice your concern say that you have to look after yourself now since you are 33+ old..
if she worries about $ I can’t say who cares that’s kinda evil. Maybe you have to invest some money for her too? Like monthly. If she is short 300$ let’s say you are able to cover her..! Don’t just drop her like that. She didn’t drop you at the orphanage either.. so try harder to help her too IF SHE NEEDS it

[Keyboardkat]

This has to be affecting other aspects of your life. For example, do you have a girlfriend, or is the fact that you are 33 and still living with Mom a turnoff for girls? And does your mom make angry faces and make nasty comments when you go on a date with a girl? Are you allowed to bring her home? There's something a little off here. Mama doesn't want her little boy to grow up. I mean, doesn't she ever want grandchildren?

[genericname85]

you move out cause you're a grown ass man and you must start living your own life. to plant the roots for your own family... you can still love your mom and visit her frequently but her time to learn to let go is more than overdue. do you have a girlfriend if i may ask?

[Pinay_ako]

Be honest with her. Just tell her you need your independence and to trust you. Tell her you’ll visit her weekly and check on her daily and she need not worry, you won’t abandon her just want to live your life on your own. She will understand.

[Anemone978]

Personally my mom is the same and doesn't want me to move out either... If you really want to move out I would say just do it, because she will probably guilt you into staying if you don't just leave lol.

[SphynxUK]

Doesn’t want you to? Why? What’s her reasoning? Anyway, regardless of the reason, the decision is yours. All parents have to experiment children fleeing the nest. In the UK it’s usually around 18/19 not 30’s!!

[Alwayreckles93]

If she wants you to stay at her house you mind as well take over her house take her into a nursing home and you become the owner of her belongings that way you don't have to waste money.

[peedy]

Stay there as long as you can build yourself up, the world is a very unfair place, or maybe your mom likes having you around makes her feel safer plus she needs someone to mow the lawn shovel snow aka all the man chores around the house

[Pinay_ako]

Wow you’re rare

[peedy]

Why you say that

[Pinay_ako]

It’s a good thing I’m saying. Most people here say just leave your mom. But you actually get what she needs. You sound like you care and that’s rare!

[peedy]

Well I have a mother to, and even though I am out on my own I find myself returning home everyday to help my mother get by and do things that she can no longer do

[Pinay_ako]

Amen. Parents are forever.

[Anonymous]

You’re a grown man. You do what grown men do, move into your own place. She’ll miss you at first (it’s called empty nest syndrome) but you come back to visit regularly and she’ll get used to the new normal.

[NostalgiaSenpi]

Have a heart to heart discussion with her, make sure she understands what you'd like and that you're not going to be leaving her life. Set up certain days where you either visit or call or video chat and make sure to be routine with it.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If she needs your financial help then stay, if not let her know you will be over the house almost everyday.

My grandma didn't want me to move out neither but I left and still go over her house 5 times a week.

[NathanDavis]

you're an adult...

have a conversation, and resolution

[annabananna]

What is her reason for not wanting you to? Is it financial or emotional?

[WhitneySnow]

Tell her the truth, that you need your independence

[Kabluie]

Move out. Why are you under momma’s orders st 30 years old?

[Mangospacho]

You’re 33. You don’t have to do as you’re told. You just do it. If your mom throws a hissy fit, so be it.

[Pete671]

get a bachelor pad and spend a few nights there each week, entertaining if you get my drift? lol,,,

[zagor]

It sounds like she is putting her own needs above your own, which is a bit selfish for a parent to do.

[Jltakk]

Same situation as you bud. Can't afford to leave anyway.

[RandomGuy1030]

Move far the fuck away as soon as possible. I know you won't though

[Anonymous]

Tell? I'd kick your ass for not stepping up. I moved out without telling my parents.