I hate my small boobs!

Ok, so I have small boobs, and there's no way they'll grow naturally. I was an early bloomer, and I've been the same size since I was 11. I'm almost 21 already.

You see, I'm a slim pear shape, which means small boobs, small waist, wide hips, abundant thighs. I'm not overweight, but I feel I look fat, despite everyone saying I'm thin, but anyway. I feel like I look out of proportion.

To make things worse, I once asked my boyfriend if he likes big breasts better, and he said yes.He said he likes them big but not massive. I don't hide my breasts from him, and he seems to like them, but I can't forget about his preferring bigger boobs. That time he said Scarlett Johansson has the ideal pair. Hers are massive in my opinion.

Anyway, I've also always wanted bigger breasts myself, I just don't think small ones are attractive, especially when paired with wide hips. The problem is I'd never have surgery, one because of the risks, two because I don't have that kind of money and three because I want to be a teacher and what kind of role model would I be? What if I ever have a daughter? She'd have small breasts, probably, how would I explain what I did (if I got surgery)?

I know it's all about confidence and the inside, and sure my boyfriend loves me, but I can't shake off these feelings of inadequacy and envy, especially when we go out together and a lot of girls are flaunting their stuff. The other thing is, in my country, all guys are obsessed with big breasts - real or fake. So when we're around guys, they will all comment about girls with big breasts, or make jokes about small chested girls. To make things worse I have nothing to compensate it with, physically - my butt is not great, my legs aren't great, my face is plain and my hair is sparse. And anyway, sexually most of those things don't seem to be as important as breasts (in sex scenes in movies they usually focus on showing a woman's breasts, have you noticed?).

I don't know. I know I can't make them grow without having risky, expensive surgery (in my country, it isn't as easy to have surgery as it is in the US or Europe). Yet I can't seem to accept them or like them, because to me they're unattractive unless you have something else to compensate it with (which I don't have). Plus knowing my boyfriend prefers chesty girls makes me feel even uglier. I know he didn't tell me that to make me feel this way, but whenever I tell him about this hang up he says "it's just a preference, I love you, don't make such a big deal about breasts" he gets angry when I bring it up. I also seem to see everything as sexual - the other time we watched a play and there was this part when some girls got topless, whenever there's a busty singer or dancer exposing cleavage on TV I feel bad, even "artsy" pictures of topless, big breasted women make me feel bad. He said that's not normal, and that not everything's sexual.

I just hate my small boobs and don't think I'll ever like them. I just wish they were big.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Learn to love your body. Hey, I for one, love your body type. I wish more women had that shape. Trust me, LOTS of guys find your body shape VERY attractive, but many may not admit it and perhaps knock you because they are not comfortable with their attraction because your type is not fashionable to admire. This is why many guys refer to women with bodies like yours with words that sound like backhanded comments at best and outright ridicule and mockery (which is false and wrong) at worst. The very vocabulary associated with your body type is malign. This is probably one reason why you feel fat, because this is how many women like you are viewed and are described (again INCORRECTLY and MALIGNLY) inspite of having a small waist.

    As they say, DON'T BELIEVE THE HYPE. Many a woman wish they had a body like yours and many a guy wish they could have a gal that looks like you even if just for a single date.

    Joking about the size of a woman's breast is very juvenile, please don't ennoble their comments with your worry.

    I think years later you will feel better for not getting surgery. I think you believe there is something wrong with your body because your culture has taught you and other men to dislike your body image/type through demeaning language and imagery.

    Many a guy prefer small boobs, (like me), so there are plenty who find small boobs sexy.

    Besides, you should be proud when you pass on those hips and thighs to a daughter or two, etc. not teaching them to hate their bodies as you unfortunately were taught.

    Sounds to me like you have a healthy concern and hunger for self knowledge and love. I think you are on your way to those things. Good luck to you, woman.

    My two cents.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Hi dear I am in different country and you are in different country but what I feel you are just 21 ...you have long life in frount of you ...its time to think in different way...i think as you said in your country all guys like big breast females...then you must thankfull to god that he gave you a boy friend who lives in your country but loves you to...even though most of the guys prefer big brest grils he still loves you when you speak to him about big breast she always say to you not to make this as an issue...you are truly lucky belive me he is a good guy don't worry about your hips,legs,hairs,breast have a beautiful mindset which gives you a beauty of heart and feelings...and as you grow old you will put up watch automatically...i have seen the grils having big breast but don't have a true boyfriend as you have...yeah about your concern for future role model for your daughter...dont worry your daughter will be love you more and like you more as you like her...

  • Don't stress it. Everyone is different and most everyone has something about them they would like to change. Be confident with who you are and your features. I think most guys interested in meaningful relationships would rather be with a girl who had small breasts and was confident than a girl who feel compelled to have surgery just to fit in. Give yourself time to grow. Who knows, you might have some late growth spurt! And if you ever have kids, you will probably fill out more then too! :)


What Girls Said 1

  • Here is what I have learned to do:

    1) Channel your insecurities to grow fierce AND SUCCEED: AKA F*** THEM ALL & AND SAY, "I KNOW YOU HATE MY BOOBS BUT IMA WIN YOUR ASS SO WATCH OUT, BITCH" whatever that means to ya. Working harder? Making more money? Buying men? whatever

    F*** MEN WHO LOVE BIG BOOBS (almost all men; those who claim they like small boobs are either 1)f***ed up emotionally because of some traumatic experience relating to big breasted women or 2) never got a chance to get with girls with big boobs, and now they are just telling themselves it doesn't matter.

    F*** WOMEN WHO MAKE YOU FEEL BAD : there is not much you can say.. really. They've got them, and you DONT! so just have the confidence a failing student who can demonstrate great confidence in a sea of perfect A+ students. Poker face and just lots of making up **bc maybe you can sell yourself in some other way! McDonald's doesn't have the best food, but they STILL MAKE $$$ because they are cheaper and pretty o.k. quality for the price. Same approach can be done by ya.

    2) ACTUALLY MAKE PEACE with yourself= this will be real hard.