Being shallow...

is there any shallow peeps out there?

...well I am one of them, and hate how I am because I feel like I could've already met my "soul mate" if I hadn't turned a bunch of guys down who weren't exactly my "type"...ugh


Most Helpful Guy

  • I was shallow from 10-20ish but after a while, you start to appreciate different things in your mate that are more important than looks.

    I'm glad you realize this about yourself and it's okay to admit that you are "shallow." It's cliche to say that you are into personality and that's what really matters... which most people are talking out of their asses, especially young people.

    So how / when does this mood change?

    I remember when I was first into cars, all I cared about was how much power I could make and how many cars I can beat. I wanted the car to look tight and run fast.

    After about 3 years of working on cars, you develop a different appreciation and acceptance as to what's a comfortable hp and what your car is really about. So as I learned and explored more about cars, I got over the showy aspect and the "I WANT HP RAOWRRR."

    I know my analogy is a bit male orientated but you get the gist (I hope). As you get older and continue to be around ugly/hot/average people, you'll realize what people mean by personality making a person more attractive.

    A prime example of this was a girl I met in my class, she was a bit chubby but dressed well and casual.. a 5 as I would rate her. However as I began to talk to her more, she was smart, down to earth, friendly and one day in class it dawned on me, " wow, I find this girl very attractive." She had a boyfriend so I didn't cross any boundaries but that was my apiffany (so far off spell check can't find it) when I realize that I can like a girl outside of my initial attraction level.

    So just know, over time your taste will change but don't date people based on "i should date this guy... and not him." Make mistakes now and learn from them, or else you'll be 35 thinking "i wonder what it would be like to date those guys I always wanted to."

    • Yeah I totally know where you're coming from...ive met people that are gorgeous on the outside but when I was around them more realized that they're actually not attractive at all, because of how they act.

      I'm not overly shallow I just judge people too fast I think, I mean you should be attracted to the person you're with...but I guess you'll never really know what that attraction is/will be until you give them a chance.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Yeah, I'm a little shallow. And you are kinda right cause you could be passing up on your 'soul mate', or just really great guys. But honestly, if you don't feel something for them, or enough for them, then you will be settling for less than what you want, and you want be happy. Maybe you should analyze your type of guy and maybe be slightly more lenient on some aspects of him.

  • As a guy I have to say that I am shallow, but VERY unconsciously. It's just in my nature to size people up. That doesn't mean that I hate your guts though. I do mainly judge girls by their looks because I think with my d*ck but it doesn't mean that I'm an asshole. It's just physically you are not suited to me. But that's the great thing about personality. You can totally write someone off but when you get to know them they are like WOW! It's hard getting to grips with being this way, but I believe it is natural and hardwired since the dawn of time!


What Girls Said 1

  • i know what you mean. I'm really shallow. I have a very specific type that I go for, and it's not the buff abercrombie model look, but I'm really picky about little things like, lips and noses and's ridiculous and I wish I wasn't like that, but I'm not attracted to people who don't fit my criteria. it's bad.

    • Yeah same! its the little things, mostly their face..body I don't care so much about. But I guess we can't really help it if were not attracted to the person? I dunno, I guess maybe ill grow out of it

    • Occasionally I meet someone who expands law of appearances, like recently I decided that I'm alright with blonde hair. but I still can't stand big lips or short noses...