Dressing up and down.

I don't mean to say that I don't care at all what I look like to other people at all, but my "image" doesn't worry me so much as it might, perhaps, other girls. Some days I take a long shower, spend a long time drying and styling my hair, apply my makeup carefully, and select cute, attractive outfits. But on other days, I am also just fine pulling my hair into a ponytail, forgoing the makeup, and pulling on an old t-shirt and jeans. What do guys think of this? I definitely think I'm a lot more pretty and attractive to the opposite sex when I take time to look nice, but then I think I attract guys that care a bit TOOOO much about image, fashion and personal hygiene, and that they simply wouldn't be attracted to me when I am not so fixed up (or if I'm naked?). On the other hand, I'M not very attracted to guys who roll out of bed fifteen minutes before class and pull on yesterday's jeans and a t-shirt, either. Are there guys that can work with both extremes?


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  • My advice is, do what you feel comfortable with, because it is going to be too much stress and make you feel too restricted to style yourself how someone else wants. It will be much healthier for you to be with a guy who makes you feel relaxed and that you are beautiful no matter how you are dressed. There are guys who care a lot about style, but most guys I know care more about other things--like whether your face and body and personality are their type.

    A guy who is mature and well-balanced will not expect you to dress a certain way all the time. He might prefer a certain style and appreciate it when you dress that way, but he won't care that much. He will be attracted to you based on other things than your style. I have found that guys who are really anal about girls' style are often immature and don't have a lot of experience with women. They mainly care about having a hot girlfriend to impress their friends and don't care about the girl.

    I have a friend who is a former beauty queen and she used to spend most of her pay-check plus hours every day trying to make herself look the way her dates wanted her to look. They were all very particular about her style. I like most men, but I thought her boyfriends were all d***s. They didn't treat her well, they didn't care about her. They criticized her looks a lot and bugged her about how they wanted her to dress. She did not know that guys can be different (really nice and fun to be with) until we went camping and she met one who told her that she looks beautiful without makeup. This gave her the confidence to dress down sometimes and dress up on special occasions. Now she can spend her time on other things and she is not always worried that people are evaluating her based on her style. She looks beautiful dressed up or down.

    I'm telling you this in case my friend's situation sounds familiar to you. Don't waste your life worrying that you are not good enough for guys. My advice is, avoid the guys who have strong preferences about your style. Go with the ones who think you are beautiful dressed up or down. There are a lot of them around.

  • Dress how you want. If you are attractive he will be able to tell whether you look glammed out or casual. If you find that you attract guys who care too much about image, find a balance between no makeup/t-shirt/jeans and super dressed up. Don't look sloppy though.