when I'm checking out women I 1. make sure she is not a puppet to a mainstream trend. (because I want someone that is worried about love, more than a social status. and I don't plan on conforming to a mainstream trend and e time soon.) 2. Common Intereast (Id go to a chick with a black-metal band tee-shirt, before id even look at a paris hilton. 3. pills, plates and straws repell me, if I meet a girl, and I see her snorting something, she won't be seeing much of me and e more ever. 4. No conflicting intereast (if I check out a chick but her car is playing rap I forget about it and search again. 5. Arrogance just makes me think she's a bitch, 6. looks (do-able)
Because looks are the first thing you see, and personality is the second. I think that sums it up.
...also, girls can go for people above a specific height. Now that's something you REALLY cannot change. How fair is THAT? Being materialistic is just as bad and "superficial" as going solely for the surface. And to be honest, I'd say being materialistic is worse - you cannot change that your primary preference is physical appearance, but it does help what you value more - the personality itself or the fact that they can provide you with shelter and living conditions. "I sell my emotions for housing, sex and fun". It reeks of selfishness. It's rational, but just as disgusting.
Also, there are always people with twisted tastes who will find something obnoxious attractive. Always. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Girls go 4 looks 2. Once I was with a guy because I was attracted to his kindness and personality but it never lasts. Attraction is key its what brings people together. Some girls are gold diggers but not all of us. Looks aren't everything usually really good looking fellas are all about themselves ... panseys ...so not attractive. I think girls mostly go for good looking funny guys who treat them well and make them laugh they keep it interesting. Plus lets be honest 90% of us women out there aren't natural beauties so we go 4 guys that were level with. So we no wen the masks come off that they still find us attractive and that's another reason y you see really good looking girls with ok guys ... its an illusion.
Oh, this goes both ways! You women are the exact same way! How many of you girls would go for a nice guy, with a great personality if he were fat, pasty and bald? Unless he has money and you're a gold-digger, none of you would!
I think for both men and women, there comes a time in their lives when they get scared. The fear of being alone sets in, so they settle for a person they feel safe with... someone who will be their companion. So, when that time comes they do choose personality and compatibility over looks.
But mainly younger people go for looks. I know I can't fall in love with an overweight woman. I have no sexual desire for a woman who is fat. I need that right combination of physical attraction and emotional connection. I want her body and I crave her heart. Damn. That's a beautiful thing.
Umm.. so if a guy had a decent job and Big muscles you'd marry him even if he was totally FUGLY?
Looks are important because it's how our minds work. There are many girls out there that I wouldn't even want to have sex with because they are too un-attractive to me. Girls need to be attractive. Being very skinny isn't necessary if you have a pretty enough face. If your face isn't absolutely Gorgeous and you look more on the average side then you need to be my "type" skinny, and short. I do have to say, if your personality is bad then none of these matter at all
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Asker
+1 y
Well I don't like big muscles but yes, as long as he's healthy, has a decent job, and treats me good then it doesn't matter.
I know if the personality is really bad guys won't like it, but what I'm saying is that everything comes second to looks and guys are always giving us girls a false sense of hope by saying that it's the personality that matters most.
But yeah...sex isn't really a biological or domestic reason for going for looks.
Standingpretty, though looks aren't the only thing that matters, looks are the strongest part of attraction (for guys). For girls it tends to vary more but the same CAN be true for girls as well.
The goal is to find someone you can enjoy being with, not merely tolerate.
yea, men want a wonderful, compatible personality. Put if just looking at the woman makes him cringe, how is she even gonna get near him to prove she has a great personality.
this may be an extreme example, but work with me.
for all people know, skunks COULD make wonderful pets, they may even be trainable, they could even fetch a stick on command. But lets face it. No one wants to try to pet one...Why?
they can "cut loose" with that wonderful smell. So as far as the average person stands, skunks live in the wild away from us.
When I was a teenager my younger sister had this friend that was pretty. I was attracted to her but she was my sister's friend. Then one day my sister's friend said and did something and it was then I knew I wanted to f*** her. No, it's not always just looks for guys. Personality does win over looks. The saying, 'beauty is only skin deep' is valid.
This whole question is moot based on the fact that your assumption is totally wrong. Guys don't go solely for looks. Maybe there are some, but they are so few in number it's absolutely absurd to draw such a conclusion.
Furthermore, what in the world made you think people would have a reason for what attracts them? Even if your claim was true, it would be impossible to explain.
"You guys always deny the fact that you go for looks and that it's the personality that matters the most. Quit lying guys...you know that looks are more important to you than anything else." - Sounds to me like you did.
Well replace solely with majorly then. It's the same difference.
Furthermore
If a guy likes a girl's personality, her looks become much, much more appealing. They say looks are what initially attract people, but it is just as easily retroactive.
looks draw you to some one but don't keep you there. its true men do get drawn to good lookin girls . but most well not the dopes most will only stay with a girl if they like them get on with them. and girls looks do have a biologicall function. girls with fuller lips high cheek bones large eyes more rounded face are all signs of fertillity in a girls.
1
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+1 y
I don't think those facial traits determine fertility. Visual signs of fertility have more to do with the body (breasts, hips, etc) & even that isn't a very reliable way to determine fertility.
I understand what you mean by looks draw you to someone, but who cares? That doesn't mean that looks are the most important thing to guys above everything else. A guy is going to choose a beautiful girl with a decent personality than a slightly less than average looking girl with an amazing personality
I agree, you paint with too broad a brush. Guys go for looks and girls go for status, but if the guy is an asshole or the woman is a bitch, they won't stick around.
Yes us men are so cruel. Women never go for looks right! Pull the other one, all this talk of women saying "any guy who can make me laugh gets my vote"...rubbish, your telling me they will go for the ugly, obese guy who makes them laugh all the time. Or the good looking, dream boy.
Guys just don't know how hard it is to look good 24/7...The ugliest guys try going after the prettiest girls and we're nica about it and turn them down. As for a ugly chick. If she approaches a good looking guy, he's a d*** and don't want nothing to do with her. You can be friends with ugly people ya know.
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+1 y
This is so true. Most of the other girls that answered know it's true!
I know its true because I see it happen all the time. the fattest ugliest guys think they can have any girl they want and they really think they are good looking! It makes me sick. And the worst part is they try to get in your pants and they keep trying knowing that you aren't attracted to them!
both men and women go for looks it's an original attractant but not necessarily one that stays around forever. Looks always fade and a lot of not as good looking women who aren't hot but are just alright make housewives that everyman really wants at some point it's just that raw looks are hard to stop.
I need both looks and personality what's wrong with wanting a hot girlfriend? I'm not going to deny it that would be stupid.
I cannot and will not admit that looks are most important maybe in a total stranger that's all you have to judge on but after you no someone personality wins out and you are silly if you are trying to deny it.
It is a biological reason that men look for attractive women based on the same reason women look for men with stable incomes. It is selecting a mate. Men look towards what is attractive on a woman sexually because they conciously or unconciously are looking to mate. Someone who looks healthy and able to produce viable offspring. Attractive people are more looked upon more favorably in our society so men just look for attractive females. Now the definition of attractive is different for different people along ethnic, race, social class and enviromental lines. It is very interesting studies. You should google the topic.
Everybody wants a partner who's at least tolerably attractive. Yes, that includes women. Ever heard the word "creep"? That's what girls call ugly guys.
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Asker
+1 y
Women don't mind "creeps" if they have money and treat her good. Of course they would prefer a good looking man but don't necessarily rule out a less fortunate looking man. I think when women say "creep" it's referring to a man that acts awkward or scary.
Ok, stop assuming all women will date a guy just because he has money QA. I and plenty of other women (most, actually) are not looking for money and would take the man who has a great personality over the unattractive man with money anyday. Women who look for money in the first place are not really looking for a relationship, they're looking to become someone's parasite.
Standingpretty, I don't think anyone said all or was even referring to all. Also I don't think anyone said most women would go for an unattractive guy with money, but I think we can all agree that most women would go for a guy that is lacking in the looks department but has everything else going for him (ie. is physically fit/strong, have a descent personality, financially stable, and so forth).
I agree, but there are a few of us that DO mean it! I dated a girl who weighed 350 & EVERYONE said she was too fat, but she was sweet & wanted to be with me, so to ME she was BEAUTIFUL, or at least till she changed her mind & said it was ME that was too fat. Then she didn't attract me at all...
All of you have some good points but sometimes guys stare at the girl who is beautiful and she may get some guys bold enough to ask her out but from what I have seen and experienced, guys are many times afraid of a really sexy girl. I used to be a swimsuit model and you wouldn't believe how guys really act when no one else is around. You wouldn't believe the insecurity and the jealousy and how many times I have actually been passed up and or dumped by a guy for a girl that was not considered all that attractive or even plain.
Well to be honest as can be certain people (such as my self) seem to not all be about the looks. I agrea most mean do go for looks, but some will more often go for inner beauty. Most men like to have good looking women for often the same reason most girls want good looking guys. But men who have gotten to really know most pretty girls with lots of problems in there attitude and other similar things suddenly realize that they hate the girl there with and would of preferred they went out with a more inner beauty kind of girl. So really what I'm trying to say is there's still hope and that all guys at first are like that, but give them some time and most of them will be begging for a nice girl. :D
from an evolutionary stand point, beauty and attractiveness are indications of youth and good health, aspects that are essential to child bearing and healthy offspring. survival of the fittest? haha.
that said, guys could easily claim the same thing about girls and looks. as far as I'm concerned it's an absolute over-generalization on both fronts, not everyone is so shallow.
Check out BBC secret of the sexes attraction, women DO GO for look.
I ask myself, will I choose a lady who earn $4K a month or $1K per month, if I choose a lady who earn $4K per month, does that mean I want the lady for her money & not her? When has a human life been worth LESSER than money?
There are many things money can't solve but can in fact bring more problem. Lawsuit among family members, millionaires still unsatisfied like bucket with holes, drinking salt water to quench thirst.
The issue is confidence. Love yourself first & people will love you for who you are
Money can buy lust but not love. Money can't buy a heart SECURED with gratitude, trust, patience & compassion. - WingBliss
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
66Opinion
when I'm checking out women I 1. make sure she is not a puppet to a mainstream trend. (because I want someone that is worried about love, more than a social status. and I don't plan on conforming to a mainstream trend and e time soon.) 2. Common Intereast (Id go to a chick with a black-metal band tee-shirt, before id even look at a paris hilton. 3. pills, plates and straws repell me, if I meet a girl, and I see her snorting something, she won't be seeing much of me and e more ever. 4. No conflicting intereast (if I check out a chick but her car is playing rap I forget about it and search again. 5. Arrogance just makes me think she's a bitch, 6. looks (do-able)
Because looks are the first thing you see, and personality is the second. I think that sums it up.
...also, girls can go for people above a specific height. Now that's something you REALLY cannot change. How fair is THAT? Being materialistic is just as bad and "superficial" as going solely for the surface. And to be honest, I'd say being materialistic is worse - you cannot change that your primary preference is physical appearance, but it does help what you value more - the personality itself or the fact that they can provide you with shelter and living conditions. "I sell my emotions for housing, sex and fun". It reeks of selfishness. It's rational, but just as disgusting.
Also, there are always people with twisted tastes who will find something obnoxious attractive. Always. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Girls go 4 looks 2. Once I was with a guy because I was attracted to his kindness and personality but it never lasts. Attraction is key its what brings people together. Some girls are gold diggers but not all of us. Looks aren't everything usually really good looking fellas are all about themselves ... panseys ...so not attractive. I think girls mostly go for good looking funny guys who treat them well and make them laugh they keep it interesting. Plus lets be honest 90% of us women out there aren't natural beauties so we go 4 guys that were level with. So we no wen the masks come off that they still find us attractive and that's another reason y you see really good looking girls with ok guys ... its an illusion.
Oh, this goes both ways! You women are the exact same way! How many of you girls would go for a nice guy, with a great personality if he were fat, pasty and bald? Unless he has money and you're a gold-digger, none of you would!
I think for both men and women, there comes a time in their lives when they get scared. The fear of being alone sets in, so they settle for a person they feel safe with... someone who will be their companion. So, when that time comes they do choose personality and compatibility over looks.
But mainly younger people go for looks. I know I can't fall in love with an overweight woman. I have no sexual desire for a woman who is fat. I need that right combination of physical attraction and emotional connection. I want her body and I crave her heart. Damn. That's a beautiful thing.
Umm.. so if a guy had a decent job and Big muscles you'd marry him even if he was totally FUGLY?
Looks are important because it's how our minds work. There are many girls out there that I wouldn't even want to have sex with because they are too un-attractive to me. Girls need to be attractive. Being very skinny isn't necessary if you have a pretty enough face. If your face isn't absolutely Gorgeous and you look more on the average side then you need to be my "type" skinny, and short. I do have to say, if your personality is bad then none of these matter at all
Well I don't like big muscles but yes, as long as he's healthy, has a decent job, and treats me good then it doesn't matter.
I know if the personality is really bad guys won't like it, but what I'm saying is that everything comes second to looks and guys are always giving us girls a false sense of hope by saying that it's the personality that matters most.
But yeah...sex isn't really a biological or domestic reason for going for looks.
I appreciate your honest answer though.
Well.... Blame mainstream media... That is all I can say :P
I also have to say that looks might fade away, true beauty is forever.
Looks don't matter first, attraction does. People can be attracted to anything, so the playing field is open.
Standingpretty, though looks aren't the only thing that matters, looks are the strongest part of attraction (for guys). For girls it tends to vary more but the same CAN be true for girls as well.
The goal is to find someone you can enjoy being with, not merely tolerate.
yea, men want a wonderful, compatible personality. Put if just looking at the woman makes him cringe, how is she even gonna get near him to prove she has a great personality.
this may be an extreme example, but work with me.
for all people know, skunks COULD make wonderful pets, they may even be trainable, they could even fetch a stick on command. But lets face it. No one wants to try to pet one...Why?
they can "cut loose" with that wonderful smell. So as far as the average person stands, skunks live in the wild away from us.
When I was a teenager my younger sister had this friend that was pretty. I was attracted to her but she was my sister's friend. Then one day my sister's friend said and did something and it was then I knew I wanted to f*** her. No, it's not always just looks for guys. Personality does win over looks. The saying, 'beauty is only skin deep' is valid.
Idiocy.
This whole question is moot based on the fact that your assumption is totally wrong. Guys don't go solely for looks. Maybe there are some, but they are so few in number it's absolutely absurd to draw such a conclusion.
Furthermore, what in the world made you think people would have a reason for what attracts them? Even if your claim was true, it would be impossible to explain.
Who said guys go SOLELY for looks?
"You guys always deny the fact that you go for looks and that it's the personality that matters the most. Quit lying guys...you know that looks are more important to you than anything else." - Sounds to me like you did.
I didn't say SOLELY. I know there are more factors involved but looks always come first. Please read my question properly.
Well replace solely with majorly then. It's the same difference.
Furthermore
If a guy likes a girl's personality, her looks become much, much more appealing. They say looks are what initially attract people, but it is just as easily retroactive.
looks draw you to some one but don't keep you there. its true men do get drawn to good lookin girls . but most well not the dopes most will only stay with a girl if they like them get on with them. and girls looks do have a biologicall function. girls with fuller lips high cheek bones large eyes more rounded face are all signs of fertillity in a girls.
I don't think those facial traits determine fertility. Visual signs of fertility have more to do with the body (breasts, hips, etc) & even that isn't a very reliable way to determine fertility.
I understand what you mean by looks draw you to someone, but who cares? That doesn't mean that looks are the most important thing to guys above everything else. A guy is going to choose a beautiful girl with a decent personality than a slightly less than average looking girl with an amazing personality
You can't speak for all men I'm not like tat.
I'm not speaking for all, I'm speaking for most, because it is true.
Il give ye most.
I agree, you paint with too broad a brush. Guys go for looks and girls go for status, but if the guy is an asshole or the woman is a bitch, they won't stick around.
Yes us men are so cruel. Women never go for looks right! Pull the other one, all this talk of women saying "any guy who can make me laugh gets my vote"...rubbish, your telling me they will go for the ugly, obese guy who makes them laugh all the time. Or the good looking, dream boy.
Why do women go for looks?
Haha,the ugly obese guy who makes a girl laugh always turns into the "brother" type guy
Guys just don't know how hard it is to look good 24/7...The ugliest guys try going after the prettiest girls and we're nica about it and turn them down. As for a ugly chick. If she approaches a good looking guy, he's a d*** and don't want nothing to do with her. You can be friends with ugly people ya know.
This is so true. Most of the other girls that answered know it's true!
I know its true because I see it happen all the time. the fattest ugliest guys think they can have any girl they want and they really think they are good looking! It makes me sick. And the worst part is they try to get in your pants and they keep trying knowing that you aren't attracted to them!
both men and women go for looks it's an original attractant but not necessarily one that stays around forever. Looks always fade and a lot of not as good looking women who aren't hot but are just alright make housewives that everyman really wants at some point it's just that raw looks are hard to stop.
I need both looks and personality what's wrong with wanting a hot girlfriend? I'm not going to deny it that would be stupid.
I cannot and will not admit that looks are most important maybe in a total stranger that's all you have to judge on but after you no someone personality wins out and you are silly if you are trying to deny it.
It is a biological reason that men look for attractive women based on the same reason women look for men with stable incomes. It is selecting a mate. Men look towards what is attractive on a woman sexually because they conciously or unconciously are looking to mate. Someone who looks healthy and able to produce viable offspring. Attractive people are more looked upon more favorably in our society so men just look for attractive females. Now the definition of attractive is different for different people along ethnic, race, social class and enviromental lines. It is very interesting studies. You should google the topic.
Everybody wants a partner who's at least tolerably attractive. Yes, that includes women. Ever heard the word "creep"? That's what girls call ugly guys.
Women don't mind "creeps" if they have money and treat her good. Of course they would prefer a good looking man but don't necessarily rule out a less fortunate looking man. I think when women say "creep" it's referring to a man that acts awkward or scary.
Ok, stop assuming all women will date a guy just because he has money QA. I and plenty of other women (most, actually) are not looking for money and would take the man who has a great personality over the unattractive man with money anyday. Women who look for money in the first place are not really looking for a relationship, they're looking to become someone's parasite.
Standingpretty, I don't think anyone said all or was even referring to all. Also I don't think anyone said most women would go for an unattractive guy with money, but I think we can all agree that most women would go for a guy that is lacking in the looks department but has everything else going for him (ie. is physically fit/strong, have a descent personality, financially stable, and so forth).
I agree, but there are a few of us that DO mean it! I dated a girl who weighed 350 & EVERYONE said she was too fat, but she was sweet & wanted to be with me, so to ME she was BEAUTIFUL, or at least till she changed her mind & said it was ME that was too fat. Then she didn't attract me at all...
All of you have some good points but sometimes guys stare at the girl who is beautiful and she may get some guys bold enough to ask her out but from what I have seen and experienced, guys are many times afraid of a really sexy girl. I used to be a swimsuit model and you wouldn't believe how guys really act when no one else is around. You wouldn't believe the insecurity and the jealousy and how many times I have actually been passed up and or dumped by a guy for a girl that was not considered all that attractive or even plain.
Well to be honest as can be certain people (such as my self) seem to not all be about the looks. I agrea most mean do go for looks, but some will more often go for inner beauty. Most men like to have good looking women for often the same reason most girls want good looking guys. But men who have gotten to really know most pretty girls with lots of problems in there attitude and other similar things suddenly realize that they hate the girl there with and would of preferred they went out with a more inner beauty kind of girl. So really what I'm trying to say is there's still hope and that all guys at first are like that, but give them some time and most of them will be begging for a nice girl. :D
from an evolutionary stand point, beauty and attractiveness are indications of youth and good health, aspects that are essential to child bearing and healthy offspring. survival of the fittest? haha.
that said, guys could easily claim the same thing about girls and looks. as far as I'm concerned it's an absolute over-generalization on both fronts, not everyone is so shallow.
Check out BBC secret of the sexes attraction, women DO GO for look.
I ask myself, will I choose a lady who earn $4K a month or $1K per month, if I choose a lady who earn $4K per month, does that mean I want the lady for her money & not her? When has a human life been worth LESSER than money?
There are many things money can't solve but can in fact bring more problem. Lawsuit among family members, millionaires still unsatisfied like bucket with holes, drinking salt water to quench thirst.
The issue is confidence. Love yourself first & people will love you for who you are
Money can buy lust but not love. Money can't buy a heart SECURED with gratitude, trust, patience & compassion. - WingBliss