I hear people are attracted to people of similar "levels of attractiveness"?

And while I have never felt tremendously confident about my looks, I still find myself attracted to the pretty/beautiful girls...

I hang out with good looking people, they seem to like enough... lol. I get a lot of compliments from OLDER women in their late 20s and older that I'm "cute/handsome/good-looking"...

I also have heard that it's proven that people pursue others with similar levels of attractiveness. So if I'm pursuing good looking girls, I must be a good looking guy... correct?

I'm honestly not all that confident with my looks, but it could just some insecurity I have... idk. I just want to make sure I don't have like too high of standards or something. I will say this tho, I tend to go for girls that are more cute/naturally beautiful as opposed to the perfect 10-lots-of-make-up type girl...


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, I'm not sure if there's such a thing as standards when it comes to love... whoever said "love is blind" knew what they were talking about. I wouldn't put much stock in that "scientific evidence" either. I don't think anything even close has been proven... and if it has, scientists can prove or disapprove anything these days. It seems like you're sort of struggling with self-esteem. Do you feel that you have something to prove to girls? Other guys? Just remember that dating is for you and the person that you care about, no one else.

    • I agree... I'm trying to become a more confident person. I also hear that confidence comes naturally as you get older as well... I'm not too worried about it I guess.

    • Well, self-esteem is built over time. When you find yourself underestimating yourself or thinking things that put you down, change what you're thinking about. Don't feel foolish if you need to write a list about all of the good things about you. It's a great way of building self-esteem. Simple and easy, too.

    • Yeah that's a good idea! maybe it'd help me turn over a new leaf! haha

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What Girls Said 1

  • Meh, it could be true for some people, not true for all, right? I mean, I consider myself to be very attractive, but I still go for men that don't tend to be on the same level... mostly due to insecurities, and all that jazz. I mean, I've seen some awful looking guys, with some really attractive women, too... it could be a mixture of how the girls perceive themselves (not only on a physical level, but mental, emotional, psychological), or the fear of rejection from 'hot' guys (who are preeetty much invaluable to a society), or the fact that confidence is really attractive. There are so many different variables, that there's really no way of knowing FOR SURE. But, I mean, what you say does make a lot of sense, and it probably happens a lot, I just don't notice it much, I guess?


What Guys Said 1

  • You're likely a handsome fellow. If you're dating the girls you want to date, does it really matter? The only time your standards are too high is when start asking: "Why do all girls reject me?" Are you going to lower your standards; because, life should be fair? You're doing ugly guys a favor by having high standards. If you start dating ugly girls, ugly guys have no shot at all.

    • Well... I'm a good guy tho... and I know how unattractive they seem to be to girls. so I guess in terms of overall looks, it might not even be an issue. my female friends, the few I do have, are pretty good looking. they look me in the eye and don't seem repulsed by my looks or anything so I figure that's good. lol.

      I'm a nice person tho, and I know the speech on being a jerk to get girls... :/ lol

    • I'm not telling you not to be a good guy and don't be a jerk. Any guy who tells you to be a jerk is the guy who's tried being a jerk, and he's back to the question "why do girls reject me?"

      Don't take advice from women; you never get the truth. You get that woman's version of the truth.