What Are The Signs Of Being "Out Of League"?

Guys and Girls - I hear the term "Out Of League" sometimes and wonder what they base it on. Is it the car someone is driving, the job, the place they live, the clothes they wear, etc. ?

What could be the signs that someone might be out of league for you? What are the signs that the guy might be thinking that the girl is out of league for him? And what do you do then? Do you just walk away or do you still try to date?

Thanks for your time!



Most Helpful Guy

  • This is such a complicated question.

    In behavioral economics, the term "league" would best be translated into "dominance"

    People are dominant in specific aspects.

    A guy in the gym that's 6'6", 280lbs of muscle, and can bench-press 400lbs, is clearly dominant.

    A guy who can walk inside a board-room, save a deal, renegotiate more favorable terms, and lock-in a sweet $1.2 billion for the company is clearly dominant.

    A guy who can walk into a new place, in front of total strangers, and capture everyone's attention (in a good way), and make 50 new friends, is clearly dominant.

    A guy who has a $10.6 million home, a $200,000 car, is a doctor and a lawyer, making $2 million a year, and only 28 years old, is clearly dominant.

    Each one of these people's value is closest to the 99.99999th percentile in whatever specific field they specialize in.

    BUT! If you match the gym rat with the doctor/lawyer; now you have a problem?

    Who is dominant?

    They both are, and they both aren't. We can't compare apples to oranges. However! We CAN take an OVERALL value for people, weigh it by level of importance, and then come up with an OVERALL score, in order to fairly compare two people with different kinds of dominance.

    Donald Trump, for example, is out of Megan Fox's league. Oprah, is out of Donald Trump's league. Why?

    Well, when trying to compare apples to oranges, we have to find a way to account for which qualities are simply more important & valuable than others.

    In rank of highest to lowest; here are the qualities that are most critical to one's survival, family's survival, partner's survival, ability to enjoy life & maximize their happiness, and social status:

    - Power (aka. economic rent, or human capital. it's basically some rare or highly developed skill or talent that allows a person to earn..)

    - Money (we all have anywhere from 70-100 years to live. we can convert that time, into money. in effect, if a lawyer charges $1,000 an hour, while a waiter earns $10 an hour, what we're really saying is that, one hour of a lawyer's time, is worth 100 hours of a waiter's time. AND, it would take a waiter 100 hours of waitering, to fairly trade for one hour of a lawyer's services. the higher the value of services we have to offer to others, the more society rewards us with more TIME to enjoy our life or better ensure our survival)

    - Personality (we're not just financial beings. we're also emotional beings. even if we're sheltered, clothed & fed, we will grow quite lonely and depressed if we're not given the proper love & emotional comforting & support. people with a great personality offer us the emotional value we need to feel emotionally satisfied)

    - Sex (we're also sexual beings. the appearance of our partner affects our desire for sex, and pleasure we have from sex)

    People try and date those who roughly-equal value to offer them; even if a specific value isn't exactly equal; for as long as the OVERALL value is.

    • That a verbose reponse. The correct answer is - "any girl that tells you to p*ss off is out of your league."

    • Show All
    • I don't think most girls reject guys for a quick ego boost. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but I don't believe such is the norm. All the same, I don't disagree with anything you said.

    • Thank you for your responses! I love your comments. Keep them coming.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Who thinks they're out of my league? Females that breathe!

    For me, if they're REALLY REALLY pretty, say they look like a model, they're definitely above my league; but with the reactions I've been getting, it's pretty much the first part that takes care of things.

    How I handle is is different each time, but generally speaking, I just don't bother. I try to flirt, that usually goes no where. And for me, a real genuine positive response to my flirting would be a big part of what happened next. It rarely gets to that point, so beyond flirting, I eventually get discouraged and walk away. It may get to a point where I ask the woman out, but that's not likely, especially if they've been rude.

  • For girls its (am I hot enough for this guy to talk to me)

    For guys its (do I have the social skills to talk to her and keep her interested.)

    If the answer is no, or maybe, or I don't know. They are out of your league.

    For girls its finite, either you are hot or you are not. No amount of -thinking- will put you in a mans league.

    For guys its whether you believe you are in her league or believe that you aren't ,you are right.

  • 1. They make a lot more money than you.

    2. They are more educated than you.

    3. They are much more fit than you. They upkeep their body better.

    4. They are of a much better social background.

    5. They are significantly more socially popular.

    Just 5.


What Girls Said 1

  • well attiudes tend 2 let you know if people is out of your league

    • That's a really bad (biased) indicator of true value.

      a common psych project any psych major has to do in undergrad is to ask 300 students if they think they are "below average", "slightly below average", "average", "slightly above average", or "above average"

      no nobody's surprise, EVERY SINGLE STUDENT reports the same findings, that on AVERAGE, people consider themselves ABOVE AVERAGE.

      In which case, where is the AVERAGE?

    • It's VERY easy for ANYONE to simply put on an attitude and tell themselves:

      "ugh, I'm so worth it!"

      or like every high school girl..

      "I'm very hard-to-get/not easy/difficult"

      or like every high school boy..

      "i'm the biggest playa.. my c0ck is 10inches long.. and that's not even when it's hard"

      a person's attitude and self-reported/self-perceived value.. is obviously biased.. unrepresentative of the truth.. and clearly a poor indicator for someone's TRUE value..