What should I do with my dry frizzy fly away curly hair and oily roots?

I've been having this problem for years now, nothing works with it. I've noticed that as I've gotten older my hair has gotten way more frizzier at the bottom and oily at the roots along with more curly. I Just don't know what to do with it at this point. It's all matted at the top because of all the excess oil and dry, frizzy, fly away and brittle towards the bottom.

I always tie my hair up in a ponytail because of the embarrassment of my hair. I'm Just too embarrassed to let it down because 1. It doesn't look good and 2. It gets in people's faces and also I also start getting frizzy strands in my face. I've been suffering with this hair for years with no solution.

But now recently as I've progressed later into life it's gotten way more curlier than it was when I was younger. I've always dreamed of straight unfrizzy hair and I'm unable to do anything with it. I've not seen anyone else with this type of hair at all.

It doesn't look any better when I comb it, the oil just gets spread on the top of my head making the top half of my hair near the roots matted, greasy and flat. Then towards the middle a little greasy with frizz and curl, and then completely dry, brittle and fly away at the bottom. I'm sorry for my long rambling, but I was trying to explain my hair in detail to get an answer from somewhere 😔 Please help..
What should I do with my dry frizzy fly away curly hair and oily roots?
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