Inner Beauty Vs. Outer Beauty?

[sa230e]

Well I think it's over-generalizing to say that but there's a little bit of truth to it though. As I've always said, we are products of our experiences, so I guess it stands to reason that people's reactions to one's physical attractiveness will influence their personality at least somewhat. If people consistently worship you for your appearance it's easy to get a big head from it. Conversely, if you've been constantly derided for it, those painful experiences can teach you wisdom, empathy and mercy. For the vast majority of people, they fall somewhere in between those two extremes.

Even then, just because someone appears to be a jerk to you they might not really be that way all the time. People have bad days and say things they don't mean. Beautiful women get harassed a lot by guys and they may become overly defensive. Shit happens.

Personally I think I'm a pretty good guy on the inside. I'm not arrogant, self-centred or hateful and I'm definitely not stupid. As for the outside, people don't really tell me how I look one way or the other so I don't really know if I'm attractive or not. I think I look alright. I'm not the most handsome guy in the world but I don't think I'm ugly.

[TurbulentDan12]

I think the reason this seems to be true is that people who are attractive get treated differently. They are given things their whole life and are used to a certain level of interest in them no matter what they do. They sometimes can lack some of the life experiences of a lesser attractive person but this is not always the case. In fact what also is in play here is that someone who is stunning you are much less likely to notice their personality because you are so occupied by their beauty. I know plenty of girls who are not only gorgeous, but also are really great to hang out with. Of course they are the ones who can't stay single for more than a week.

Looks get you very very far in the beginning of life in ways that those who aren't as attractive probably don't even realize. Putting choosing a partner and getting more interest aside, you frequently won't experience the same problems of depression/lack of confidence that haunts a lot of us (myself included) on this site. You also have an easier time getting jobs and things like that.

Looks fade though. Once you get older and settle down there isn't so much you can get away with just using your looks. Sure you had some great experiences in the past, but I think a lot of people who were attractive have a hard time transitioning to not being desirable.

[cyrus7]

I KNOW a person can have both, I've met a lot

what do I have? I don't know honestly I would let others be the judge of that I guess,

BUT I must say that even the people who have both are not perfect, they have their faults and bad times too

[dudeman]

definitely, I've know some very beautiful women both inside and out but sadly, guys realize this and swoop the good ones up fast

[Muffinman]

I think that a person can have both! I have met some truly amazing people in my life and although beauty is in the eye of the beholder I must say they were beautiful in bost aspects. Inner beauty will get a person much farther in life simply because they are much easier to be around if they are genuinely good looking. People who are tools are annoying to be by even if they are good looking. I'm not sure which I have I guess that's out for debate whether or not I have either.

[SplashyAxis]

I think people with both attractive personalities and physical forms do exist but they're very hard to find. I've had the very fortunate experience of having a girlfriend like that, but if anything it only proved to me how rare that type of person is.

Though the stereotype of beautiful people having horrible personalities and vice versa is truthful also, and from what I've experienced, much more common. Not that it's a bad thing, I've known and do know some truly amazing and brilliant people that I love to be around even though I wouldn't consider them physically attractive.

[Blaxican619]

People can have both. I know Plenty of beautiful girls that have awesome personalities. I'd say I have the "inner beauty" trait for sure.

[unimaginative]

yeah its just not that common

[Anonymous]

I know a girl with both inner and outer beauty, and she's the love of my life. I really don't really know, but I'd have to say that o have inner beauty, because I'm hideous outside, but I tend to be loving and affectionate inside.

[ambermarie]

I think its possible to have both inner and outter beauty, but its far and few.

i have met a couple people that were good lookin and a nice person and a lot of fugly aholes lol

idk

looks get you farther

[CosmoGal]

People say beautiful people on the outside are ugly on the inside, but that is not always the case. I think people judge beautiful people harshly out of personal insecurity.

[elements]

I agree 100% with pretty much everything the anonymous user said below me. Awesome answer.

[Anonymous]

Looks get you further, no doubt about it. Better looking people get paid more. What I wouldn't give to be a hot guy in his 20s.

I know one girl who is hot and not at all conceited. The thing about most hot girls is they get sucked into the popular crowd early on, and so are encouraged to lead a very shallow lifestyle based around makeup and other ridiculous nonsense. This one non-conceited girl was too crazy and off the wall to fit in with the popular crowd, hence why we became friends :)

Us uglies who were bullied learn to find other ways to attract people. Most guys I've been out with have started out as friends who then realized I'm excellent girlfriend material. I also pose a challenge to men, and tease them quite a lot.

Men also like how I'm not obsessed with clothes or shoes and take 2 minutes to get ready...

My experiences with all the popular pretty girls at school were that they are the kind of person who sneers when you laugh too loudly.

[Anonymous]

i don't think people with both are hard to find. I think if you don't see people with both too often then its usually due to your own lack of perception and usually you find what you really look for in others. if you have it made up in your mind that beautiful people are ugly inside, then you're naturally more likely to pay more attention to the people who meet your prejudice. that's with any prejudice out there. I personally have known lots of attractive people who were really good people as well.

although, it depends on what you define as inner beauty and outer beautiful. no doubt, the people I'm talking about meet society's idea of beauty, the conventional idea of beauty. not everyone is going to find them attractive though. same for inner beauty. everyone finds different personalities appetizing and different morals and values. online, I notice a clear prejudice against certain types of people. on GaG, I notice many people like more conservative traditional women, or they like good girls, virgins, etc. these are things that they consider as part of someone's inner beauty. I don't find any of that particularly attractive or unattractive and I've known plenty of people who fit those stereotypes who were not at all what I would call "good people" or even "nice people." I look for certain things in personality types and character that I consider to be beautiful and appealing. not everyone will be attracted to those things, just as not everyone will be attracted to the same outer appearance . so there's that...

I have gotten to know all kinds of people that fit all kinds of molds, and I think to even fathom separating most of them based on looks and what kinds of personalities they have is kind of ridiculous. sure, many people who are praised as giving good looks end up being a certain way, but I've known ugly people who have the exact same personalities. its more about their life history than their genetics. you never know where people are coming from. I was never really hideous but I did go through years of being the "ugly duckling" and I was teased a lot at one point. now, people tell me all the time that I'm beautiful, attractive, etc. I actually had one girl pull that card with me once. we were talking about something (cant remember exactly what it was) and she made a comment like "oh that's because you look the way you do, you don't know what its like to deal with this". that kind of annoyed me. like, bitch, you have no idea what I went through growing up.

even if its not about them being unattractive in the past, people experience all kinds of things that contribute to who they are. my mom is very judgmental, mean, and narrow minded, but beautiful. has nothing to do with how she looks, and everything to do with growing up in the projects and having poor family filled with drug addicts and alcoholics who did nothing with their lives, and the shame she deals with.

[Anonymous]

Do you think(or from your experiences) a person can have both inner and physical beauty?

Yes. I know several people who are gorgeous on the inside as they are on the outside. They are seemingly prefect because they're nice and sweet and naturally beautiful.

Is there in truth to the stereotypes from your past experiences?

Yes. Stereotypes are generally based on the truth. I feel like a lot this comes from HS where the popular kids were always d***s to everyone and they were pretty. And the geeks were always nice and smart, but ugly. And while those are just movies, there is some truth to it.

Which do you have? Or are you a lucky person with both? :P

I think I have better inner beauty. Not that i"m ugly by any means lol, but I'm not a super model either.

Which TRULY gets a person farther in life?

Outer beauty. Doors open for them without them having to do anything but look pretty.

[Anonymous]

I think that the happiest people have inner and outer beauty.

I've met a few spectacular women from my old job and through my mom who (seem to) have great families, strong marriages, amazing homes, nice cars, close relationships with God and great looks and they're the most genuine, kind hearted people because they are so blessed. I think that they don't take everything for granted and are always willing to help others.

Of course, people have preconceptions and don't bother getting to know the hot chick because they assume she's as dumb as a rock or don't notice the plain Jane girl at the party and assume she's a nerd because she's not dancing and drunk off her ass. You can't really know someone just by looking at them though. Especially when we're talking about souls and inner beauty.

I think my spirit is more beautiful than my appearance alone but having the rare combination of inner and outer beauty will definitely get you far. I aspire to be like the women that I know who seem to "have it all."

[Anonymous]

Yes people have both. Though it is great to have both I still tend to think that looks get a person further ahead than we like to admit.