How can I change my style and personality?

I know no one can change you, but I want to know how can I change my style and open up from my shyness?

try to open yourself.


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What Guys Said 1

  • You're on the right track, because you're asking a "how" question about your behavior. This gives you a target, a goal.

    I used to be extremely shy. But I've taught myself to be more outgoing. Here's how you start:

    You make small talk with _everyone you possibly can_. Bank tellers, co-workers, supermarket clerks. Young, old, male and female, black and white. You ask about their earrings, their hair, the weather, their job -- you ask about any subject you can possibly think of. And you smile.

    Your goal is simply to talk to people. Not to get a date, not to make a new friend. Simply to have mini-conversations with as many people as possible.

    It may feel strange, and it may feel forced. Do it anyway. You'll feel strange because you're pushing from your comfort zone. Some people won't be interested in small talk, but most will.

    Your homework for tomorrow is to visit a place where there's lots of opportunities to talk. Shopping malls are perfect. Leave your wallet in the car, because buying things is not your goal.

    For 30 minutes, walk into every store you can, and make small talk with a clerk for a few minutes. Ask about what's on sale. Ask about how they like their job. Ask about their engagement ring. Ask about anything. Most clerks are talkative, so you'll be having conversations with people who like talking.

    The more you do this small-talk project, the easier it becomes. The less self conscious you'll feel. And it will give you more confidence to let your inner personality shine through.

    Good luck!


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