I try not too think it but I have very low self esteem. Especially since my ex left me for a much prettier girl. Even though my mom and my friend tell me that I'm pretty; I just don't believe it. If a census was done on determining whether I was pretty or ugly, I think the majority would say that I'm ugly.
My honest opinion just how some people are born pretty others are born ugly. But I'm being told to disagree and that ugly does not exist. What do you guys think?
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A nice girl at school told me that "there is no such thing as an ugly woman, only a lazy woman," presumably, all women can be pretty if they work at it. Books, intelligence, fitness, conversation, skills etc etc... it's just like us guys.
Anyway. I bought into what she said because it made sense to me, I do not know why. BUT then again, she was not a HOT girl, probably a 4/10 in my book... and she kept wearing the same clothes so... maybe 3/10 lol...
But I think that the statement is sound and it works.
Ugly or beauty if subjective, and it can encompass MANY MANY things, behavior , physique, prospects, talents etc etc... and ofcourse moral choices in life.
E.g if a hot girl was beautiful... but she liked to kill children... that to me is ugly. You take my meaning?
You can always find pretty/ugly things in people if you REALLY scrutinize things or people.
Hell I can scrutinize right now, and so could anyone else:
Okay.. girl 1 I know:
-Pretty face, amazing hair. +1
-BUT ugly legs like match-sticks and she has scars because she may be a bit freaky (suicidal). -2
-She talks straight, no bullsh*t + 1
-She's kinda smart and she likes dirty dancing +1 or -1 depending on how you go.
Okay girl 2 I have loved:
-She is very fat (according to most guys). So that's probably -1
-She can cook. she can bake. +1
-She can paint, write and sing and is great at the piano +1
-She has amazing eyes and long hair, and when we she is over me, we are like in a tent with just the 2 of us. +1
-She is not very educated... like she didn't get into college -1
Now... I mean those are just some of the traits of beauty or ugly about her. But why did I love her? Because I saw past certain things, or I didn't even SEE the "ugly" sides to her (when most of my guy friends did)
[I could go on and on but I think you get the idea]
Now you can also do this for yourself... and this affects your self imagery and confidence and is important. You must learn to accept yourself and work at making yourself "not ugly."
-I am not "hot," right now because I am overweight, can't exercise because I have several injuries from the army and am doing physiotherapy. So that's a -1. HOWEVER, I have the potential to be "hot" again in future. So that's good... even though I am "not hot," you gotta think of things in positive ways.
-I do have a great face at least +1; proper teeth, good complexion and warm eyes.
-I did do college, I am pretty smart etc +1.
Self-Scrutiny what makes me ugly:
-I do have an inferiority complex at times -1
-I do have a problem with anger and I do escalate things (to the point sometimes I want to kill people who vex me) -1
-> however, I know this and I try to walk away
-I don't like religion/christians -1 (at least for some ppl)
-I can be very extremely emotional at times from previous PSTD -1
So I think you are right, ugly does not exist yet it does because it is a social construction.