I used to be intimidating to people and more physically attractive...

After gaining weight and looking sh*tty these days (stress, depression, lack of effort into my outfit), I have noticed a remarkable difference in how others treat me, and more specifically how approachable I am to others.

it seems like more people on the streets are comfortable asking me for directions or panhandling me for money (happens quite often these days), and this may be caused by my non threatening appearance, as in I look pathetic and vulnerable, rather than sturdy and looking like I take sh*t from nobody.

i know this change in my approachability shouldn't be bothering me, but it does bother me how I am now perceived as one of the average looking people and nobody seems to be intimidated by me.

I remember two or three years ago, when I wasn't so unattractive, there were guys in my class who seemed to visibly be uncomfortable around my presence... now it's as if guys have no trouble speaking to me when they need to whatsoever.

does anybody else experience the same thing? as in do you feel like you are more easily approached by strangers when your appearance has gone a few notches down?



Most Helpful Girl

  • I had a similar appearance issue but in my case I was butt fugly..see nobody wants to ever talk to the butt fugly girl because the butt fugly girl ...is clearly butt fugly...people were scared of my appearance at that time. When I loosed sh*tloads of weight...got my face together...people started being nice and saying b.s like "aww, you look so much better now..." I felt like mike jones song... "Back then they didn't want me, now I'm hawt they all on me." Then before when all the dudes would be like "eewwwwwwww that fat gorrilla lookin beast bitch!" now they are like "damnnnn you lookin sexyy as fukk" But this is what I went through...i realized people are fake as sh*t. If you really gave 2 sh*ts you would like me when I look like a cow and when I look human...Not just because I looked good at the moment. I am honestly less approachable in both states..when I was fugly..no one liked to talk to me..and now people consider me better looking..I still don't get approached..But people are most happy when I talk with them now..than when I was fugly.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • gone the opposite way for sure.. I used to be intimidated sometimes by girls, now only the rarest roses get my nerves going. Gym helped me out alot. I was once 5,7 130 pounds now two years later 5'10 170, 9% body fat.

  • you still have the same face and body that you always had accept... now a day people do not except large women . stay confident and well groomed and wear makeup and they will not know the difference.

  • Ive went the opposite way if that counts?


What Girls Said 1

  • Oh yes -

    I dress down more than I dress up simply because people seem so much more chill. I like the feeling I get wearing a hoodie and sweats - because it gives the impression that I'm no girlie girl - so don't try anything stupid. Yet I'm always smiling and well mannered so just end up with people being really sweet to me in return.

    I'm absolutely weak to homeless / begging people; whenever I have money I have to give some of it away to them lol so I'm like a panhandlers dream ha ha.

    When I decide to get all dolled up - I feel like guys are more perverted and girls are more colder.

    It's such a norm where I'm at for girls to be dressed down - so dressed up girls are often sectioned off into the " high maintenence " or " potentially a bitch " category.

    :\ yea - dumb stereotypes I know.

    I feel more at ease and down to earth dressed down - I'm not overly focused on making sure my hair stays perfectly styled, or my shirt is sitting right on my body - I just feel more free to be myself and put my efforts into other things...and usually that makes interacting with people that much better ha ha


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