I always need everything to be perfect...

So as you can see, I am perfectionist. I just can't go out in clothes that doesn't suit me well, or without my hair styled a bit, even if it is just a short trip to a store or something. I just can't imagine someone could like how I look if it isn't perfect. I know I am wrong, and that nothing is really perfect. I would like to change that attitude because it is affecting other things in my life too... this looks thing is just a tip of an iceberg. So do you have any advice/suggestions for me, and do you think there is more to attraction than just looking the best in that moment?


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  • Nothing's wrong with being a perfectionist, it's actually a good thing, at least to me. The REAL problem is when you expect it from other people, and that lead to catastrophes. Try to focus on the fact that your life is your life, other people's lives are their lives. People will ask for your opinion or take on life if they want it.

  • Since "perfection" is an unattainable goal, you mean you want things to be to your specifications.

    Understand that other people have wildly different specifications than your own, and there will be many people who do NOT think you look "perfect" and don't like the way you look at ALL. Conversely, if you change your hair or shirt or get a tan, you'll meet someone else's specification, while isolating others. Every little thing you do, some people will love, and others will hate. And there's literally nothing you can do about that.

    That doesn't mean you shouldn't care about how you look and try to look good, but it certainly means that it's a pointless thing to obsess over. Let "looking good" be good enough. Don't try to be "perfect".

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