The dangers of crushing! My experience!

[Marianna34n]

Have you ever felt like the person you like is the one and only? But then you realize that the person you liked actually isn't the one for you after you looked at his attitude and behaviour?

Well, this is my experience! I am sure a lot of you experienced the same thing! In my life i had over 16 crushes on different guys and i handled my emotions differently with each one of them! Not gonna lie i fucked up with some guys because i am inexperienced with guys and literally am very shy and awkward with them! Most guys i liked weren't even my type it was just an infatuation and the fact that they looked at me and i was flattered!(stupid me) .The thing with crushes is that sometimes you get addicted to them or obsessed happened to me once and i regret that he didn't even treat me right didn't want to talk to me in real life only said hi and yeah that was mean! It was like he didn't respect me at all! It was my fault i should have left him since day one and the idea of dating him as well! He had a girlfriend after all!

The second experience with crushes is that some guys only stare but you don't know why they do so, they don't start up a conversation with me ever and i feel very inadequate! I won't bite anyone! I just really want to get to know a guy and see how it goes! I am not gonna go further with them i just really want to experience first love u know? The danger of that is that you will speculate the reasons behind his staring or smiling or touching or whatever!

I for real don't see any reason to like anyone anymore most guys don't seem serious anyway! I just wanted to share my experience with crushes.I don't know if you experienced something similar or i am the only "lucky" one😂 Thanks for reading!

[Anonymous]

I experienced something way way worse. I don't know if it just a crush or fell in love with him..
Anyway, I had been chatting with a guy that I met on this site for 7 months. At the beginning he seemed really sweet and nice and felt like we had a connection. We've been talking for several hours a day, exchanged photos, personal information, phone numbers etc. He claimed he loved me that I was the most beautiful girl on the site and that we should meet in real life and move in together, be his girlfriend, even with the prospect of marriage (!)
After New Year's Day the guy started changing his behavior.. The replies started becoming shorter and less frequent.. Then the guy started pressuring me to send him pictures in underwear and have phone sex with him, although I told him I don't feel ready for something like this... Then I accidentally found out that the guy was at a dating site and had been talking to girls there. When I confronted him about this, the guy attacked me with horrible names and insults, said we're over and blocked me on all social media just yesterday
I feel brokenhearted, betrayed and like an idiot
I wish I could alert other girls too on the site, so that they don't fall victim of this terrible person and ruin their mental health (the guy has been going after girls on the site for quite a while. There have even been complaints about him...) Now I learned my lesson.. Always be very careful and never fall for easy love oaths by guys... Especially online. Never share your photos with anyone, some people know how to manipulate young and naive girls, they are experts in psychology

Anyway, sorry for the rant. I just saw this MyTakes and felt the need to share my thoughts with someone else

[Marianna34n]

You know what? I really feel sorry for what happened no one deserves that! You are a sweet girl i am sure just get over him u will find someone better🥰

[Laura456]

Thanks for sharing this. It's a good reminder of how unsafe online chatting can be.

[Marianna34n]

@Laura456 true but i am curious to know who he is to avoid him!!

[Laura456]

So am I @marianna34n

[Marianna34n]

@Laura456 someone of us should ask her lol

[Laura456]

She should have reported him

[Marianna34n]

@Laura456 yeah sure

[Opinion Owner]

@marianna34n Thank you so much for the support and your kind words! You seem like a very nice person. I would say the name here, but now I'm a bit afraid.. Who down voted this?
Plus this is a rule against member posts

[Opinion Owner]

@laura456 I did report him
There have also been other reports on the site too, but the admins don't do anything

Anyway, I could pm you or Marianna with his name if you want

[Opinion Owner]

Apologies for the late reply
I haven't been on the site for days

[Marianna34n]

okay pm me if you can!!! U are so sweet <33

[Marianna34n]

don't need to apologize you have your priorities

[Opinion Owner]

I tried to pm you but it says you accept messages only from followings!

[Opinion Owner]

On a side note, why do all the comments on this post, although they seem reasonable? Really ood

[Opinion Owner]

*odd

[Marianna34n]

Well who knows? Follow me for now and i will follow you back and u can send me then a message :)

[Opinion Owner]

@marianna34n ok, I sent you a follow request

[Marianna34n]

Okayy

[Laura456]

I have also experienced this. I have had over 30 crushes my whole life (been counting). But that's as far as I've gotten in relationships. I haven't had the time or chance to explore relationships at a deeper level. Maybe I'll have time next year who knows. But when I do have crushes, I also have the tendency to fantasise things and this makes me blinded, I forget the fine line between what's happened in reality and what is a fantasy. Most of the time, it leaves me wondering if there was anything happening between me and the guy at all. I think some of my crushes have been one sided, it's so sad. I have a big heart with lots of love to offer :)

[Marianna34n]

Yeah i agree with you! I have never imagined doing things with my crushes though.. i just really liked some of the guys and waited them to approach me but they never did I don't understand why..

[Medhat-M]

I never had a " crush "... It was always girls were into me and that pressured me sometimes ( for various and stupid reasons lol ) to like some of them back even though I don't.. last time that happened I realized after a long time ( when clarity hit ) that there were tons of stuff I can't stand about her... And " crushing " and stuff is now a toxic thing when I think about it...

[Marianna34n]

Yeah i also dont crush on anyone anymore every guy at my school seems immature and entitled...

[Medhat-M]

Lol same... Most of the girls that stand out for me are always older... most of girls around my age and younger are silly and passive with generic personality... They're just so blah lol

[Marianna34n]

Yeah not all girls are like that but i get your point maybe there are guys who are cool I don't know

[Medhat-M]

Yeah I said most not all... They're the overwhelming majority

[OlderAndWiser]

When you have a "crush," you don't know the person. You have a vision in your head, or a fantasy, about who they are but there is no reason to think it's accurate at all. So when you finally get to know them, they are almost always different from what you had imagined.

[Marianna34n]

This exacly what i meant!!

[Guy13]

Crushing is fun and healthy

[Bl0n6eguy]

I've got a big crush on a really nice girl I know; but I'm quite a shy guy, and it started off with me just looking. Eventually I've lightly conversed with her, and found out she's a really nice person - so nice in fact, that I felt inadequate.

It's not that we (shy guys) aren't serious, it's that we can feel insecure about ourselves and no know what to say. You don't want to do something that will make your crush reject you, because that would end the crush.

It's a bit like Schrödinger's Love, it's there until you open the box to check. Therefore, the Opening of the box is the most scary part - Aka approaching and asking them out.

I haven't had many crushes, and I've felt so inadequate lately that I've booked freckle removal treatment. Men with good intentions don't know what to do anymore, you can't act all confident and approach women like in Rom Coms anymore - but there isn't any widely known replacement either... So we just look from afar, hoping to see signs it's mutual.

[AncientWisdom]

At your age it’s best to be very careful.( in these times anyone no matter age or gender should be careful ) People can tell your crushing , and unfortunately they take advantage. I grew up in the sixties and seventies. I’ve noticed how in this day and age people are mean , and can be predatory. The internet has made things way to accessible, and people develop unrealistic expectations of how life really is …. It also appears the younger the generation the meaner. So be very careful. It’s perfectly normal to crush and fantasize , but you will find your worth in your mind , and from within. Also as a young woman you’ve got a lot of opportunities more opportunities (for women fortunate enough to live in western society) then ever in known history. Take advantage of it be the best you can be chase your dreams , and keep your crushes secret until it’s the proper time in your life. That will be my advice to my granddaughters as well.

[humpbackjack]

You’re very young and have plenty of time so don’t rush into anything it will happen but here’s the thing girls have been beating guys down when it comes to breaking the ice for a long time and a lot of guys your age and even up to their thirties are scared now which to me is ridiculous but whatever also majority of guys are going to be more receptive of a girl coming and talking to them first just pick your time if you’re able to like don’t approach them in a group of guys and if you have to then plan your conversation preparing for the unexpected and give yourself a way out of it doesn’t feel right trust me a guy might get shot do three or more times out of ten where as a girl is likely to get all ten numbers trust me

[GreatBigCircles]

This is one reason I have no interested going to bars. I don't really find the idea of starting a relationship from that starting point to be appealing. I'd rather know someone and build a relationship, and then pursue them if I find myself attracted to them in that way still. I know it's not nearly as exciting, but it means not being blinded by infatuation either.

[TangBang69]

The web and social media are essentially a vast sea of infinite temptation and opportunity, bigfoot will likely be found in the forest before loyal and honest are found in this sea. I have learned that if loyalty is present it does not need to be said because it is shown. That loyal and trustworthy person likely does not indulge in social media and keep online time at minimal. Tbh, you'd be lucky to even find it in church these days.

[Twalli]

You expect something from crushes, that's not how they work.

[Marianna34n]

I know

[Bklynbadboy12]

No I've never been through that but just out of curiosity what makes you crush on someone

[Marianna34n]

Well if he is tall, handsome and has a nice body... But some of my crushes lacked one of those features and especially their personalities

[Bklynbadboy12]

Cool when was your last crush

[Marianna34n]

Months ago

[Bklynbadboy12]

So what did he do that made you think he wasn't the right guy for you

[Marianna34n]

Well he just isn't a good person and he isn't my type really it was just an infatuation due to him looking at me... i know it was dumb af

[Bklynbadboy12]

Hey its just a learning experience in the future you'll know better

[Marianna34n]

Well yeah

[Marianna34n]

I don't know why he was looking at me... but it was very flattering

[Bklynbadboy12]

Cause he thought you was attractive

[Marianna34n]

Yeah sure.😂 But still weird... why he won't approach me? That was the main reason I started disliking him...

[Bklynbadboy12]

Follow me cause we have to analyze this 😂

[Akumuviral]

You can't judge a book by it's cover. I never expect crushes to be a certain way. Leads to disappointment.

[Anonymous]

I think my biggest mistakes in life involved crushing. You set yourself up for disappointment and it causes you to be blind to the reality, that you are a complete stranger to this other person and they don’t share these feelings.

[exitseven]

This is what happens when you base a relationship entirely on what somebody looks like. People do not always act as good as they look. The converse is also true.

[BJP21]

The thing is to not have a high expectation. Half the time they often have a significant other.

[emperor90]

Wow that is true i had the exact thing happen to me

[jackiechanfan]

i ahve a crush on you now

[Marianna34n]

Really? :))

[jackiechanfan]

no not really

[Marianna34n]

Lol XD

[jackiechanfan]

you are cute though

[Marianna34n]

Thanks

[jackiechanfan]

no probl

[Marianna34n]

Anyway are u new here?

[jackiechanfan]

yes new

[Marianna34n]

Oh cool

[jackiechanfan]

what about you how long you have been here

[Marianna34n]

Very long lol

[jackiechanfan]

wow that's so long

[Marianna34n]

Well i had 4-5 accounts here i were deleting them sometimes i was bored or something or sick of anons lol

[jackiechanfan]

i go anonymous sometimes

[Marianna34n]

Really? Why?

[jackiechanfan]

so nobody knows i am a fan of jackie chan

[Marianna34n]

Lol XD that's funny

[Gwenhwyfar]

I totally agree with you

[doing_life]

you probably liked them for their looks , so you experienced a hallow effect

[JohnK123]

I’ve had too many crushes haha

[Jouth]

shut up ok

[Marianna34n]

No and u are being mean😊

[FisherJerry403]

Don’t be such a bitch if your gonna act like that just don’t respond cause this site/app if for people to ask questions and to share things to get them off their chest so how bout you shut up and stop being an asshole cause she was just sharing something not asking for that