I was in a relationship for close to a year. He was my first love. I was his longest relationship. He told me he loved me more than he had ever loved anyone, he loved me with his whole heart, that I meant more to him than anyone, even his first love. Now he has been an ass to me, we broke up. He said he couldn't handle us fighting, he didn't want to be in a relationship, that it wasn't me, that he needed to get his life together, that I was too much for him to handle. We got back together for 5 days, then he broke up with me again drunk by screaming hurtful things at me, some that I knew weren't true because they in part involved my feelings. He took off when I tried to talk to him. The next day he refused to talk to me about it when I asked, was like stop f***ing texting me, leave me alone. We didn't talk for like 3 weeks. Then when we did, he goes back and forth. One minute he will listen to me or talk to me, then next he's an ass. He says he cares about me less than any other girl, then says he will always care about me. He said he was being mean because I needed to get over and and move on. I asked why the tough guy act and he told me I knew him, and I knew he was doing it so he didn't have to show that he cared. I would try and talk and he would be like leave me alone. I finally started to accept it, and told him I wanted to let go and say goodbye for the last time. I said I needed to do it in person. We had tried this before but he turned into an ass and took off without letting me talk or say goodbye. We planned on Monday of last week. He agreed, said see you Monday and everything. Then Monday came, and I didn't hear anything so I texted him and asked what we were doing. He didn't answer. He ignored the rest of my texts that week, did not say anything at all. Even when I asked for just an answer. I still haven't heard anything from him. I told him I needed to do this to truly let it go. So when I finally say I'll give him what I want and leave him alone by letting go, he disappears? He deliberately refuses to give me what I need to let go? Is it because he can't handle saying goodbye? Or is he just an ass?