Oh boy. Where do I begin? I feel as I have been "duped" but, boy do I know I have been stupid. I met my "friend", A, a year and a half ago through a mutual friend. We got together the first time with the intention of "hooking up" but, instead A took me on what was like a date. Bought me flowers, took me to nice spots..then we had the best sex I have ever had in my life. This relationship developed in to a "friends with benefits" relationship that lasted a year. I did what every girl should not do in this type of relationship and fell for him. During our relationship we saw each other several to a couple of times a week..he would drive me to work when my car was not working.. would bring me food and take me to places from time to time...he would help me out with money and other things I needed around the house when I was going through a hard time...he had me a toothbrush at his house..among other things. I made a few pieces of artwork for him that he proudly displayed on his walls...we talked about everything that close friends talk about ..but, he would never call me his girlfriend. said he doesn't want to be trapped in a box. the better part of me knows that it means "he doesn't want to be trapped in a box (with me)" ... but, when I brought up uncomfortable conversations about taking our relationship to the next level he would always say that.. say that he is not stable enough to have a relationship...to go with the flow and form a solid foundation blah blah blah and that when he was ready to have a relationship with someone he would love it to be me. A is 33 years old and I know he was in a bad relationship a few years ago that he claims "broke him". I fell in love with A. I have never had a man treat me like he did. I felt like gold but, we never put a term of security on our relationship. The bad side is he was always gone on the weekends but, I can vouch for what he was doing on the weekend. he worked as a driving courier that took him out of town long distances. He started talking about me moving in. He asked me to be patient with him. Back in May he started a job because he claimed I inspired him to go back to school so he switched all of his focus to that. It was very abrupt with no warning and felt like he had dropped me. We went to seeing each other the way we had to nothing. I moved back to my hometown in June. I didn't talk to him until October I sent him a text and he called back and said he loved, missed and cared for me and he was extremely busy with school, fam, & work and going a bit crazy. that he would talk to me soon. well it is December now. I have been hanging on. he has sent me a few texts saying "I truly love you from the bottom of my heart be patient with me that he would have free time after exams last Thursday but, I found from a so-so source he has been seeing women. for some reason I feel betrayed. I addressed it by text 4 days ago and he will not respond. I feel like a fool. I really trusted his word..so confused!
* adding just a little bit. between June and October we had a little falling out because I asked him point blank if he only always saw me as friends with benefits, having his cake and eating it too. He got really mad and threw up in my face all the things that he did for me.
** I have periodically sent him texts letting him know I still would like clarity on our situation. Then I do admit to you all that sometimes I did send books of texts pissed and aggravated...and telling him I am done.. in which he sent text messages saying to "be patient"
*** Also he has called me 4 times in these 6 months I have not seen him. 3 I couldn't answer so I got voice mail. 1 was a very quick conversation in which he said he would talk to me soon.