Should I tell my girlfriend everything about who texts me and calls me?

My girlfriend ask me to tell her, even if i tell her she claims that i hide secrets and fight. So damn frustrating. Im kindofa private person and i dont expose my self to anyone. Is it really necessary to be so damn open?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • What is the context here? Who are you getting calls and texts from who your girlfriend feels she needs to know about? Have you cheated or given her any reason not to trust you?

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    • She says she needs to know when a girl texts or calls me. No i hav never cheated before. And whenever i tell her that this girl has texted me, she gets jealous and all

    • It sounds like she has some trust issues. But, at the same time, who are these girls who are texting you? Are they close friends, who your girlfriend knows? Coworkers? Or just random acquaintances? I would argue that if you're texting with random girls just for someone to talk to, then your girlfriend has a right to feel uncomfortable with that.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Don't hide if she asks, but do talk to her about it that you feel frustrated about it and that you feel that she doesn't trust you. Perhaps she has a reason not to trust you? As with everything in a relationship; there is no "to much communication".

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What Girls Said 18

  • The point is, you decided to date her. And these are her terms for dating you. If it's that bad, perhaps you need to tell her that you can't be in a relationship with her. However, if you are that private and is hiding something from her, then she has the right to suspicious as ANY person would. Sounds like dating is not for you. Besides, it shouldn't be that hard to tell somebody who you're talking to. If your that defensive, it comes off as lying. Then she will lose trust and break up anyway. Never create a situation where that other person feels they can't trust you.

    "Im kindofa private person and i dont expose my self to anyone. " Again, sounds like dating is not for you if you don't want to be vulnerable with somebody. That is what makes a relationship.

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  • I wouldn't say it's that necessary to be that open with her! She sounds a little controlling I won't lie! She should trust you and respect your wishes if you don't want to share that information with her.

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  • NOPE. ITS PSYCHO TO WANT TO KNOW THAT. Relationships should be built on trust. Tell her that you like/love/whatever you feel about her to reassure her, but all her if she cannot trust you you are out the door.

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  • No. Your privacy is not some sort of a requirement when you're in a relationship, it is not to be demanded. When you give your Facebook password, or every little detail on what's inside your phone/inbox, it's supposed to be a privilege on the part of the receiver (in your case, your girlfriend).

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  • No it's not wrong to want your privacy. There's missing trust here for some reason and if you haven't done anything to break that trust then it's on her. If you can't live with her stipulations for dating her then don't.
    My only stipulation ever has been do not contact anyone you've previously slept with (none of his exs were friends with him when we got together anyway). And if they contact you tell me.

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  • My boyfriend and I ask each other about messages and phone calls , mainly for sake of conversation and keeping up with each others friend groups. We are just interested in each others lives. He wants to hear my latest drama and I want to see the funny meme his buddy sent him.

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  • Not everything but just be honest if she gets curious or suspicious or if you feel guilty. When she can trust you enough from that, the relationship can be rock solid unless it's not working out 😕

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  • she is highly insecure. run until you can. it'll just get worse. she's not even believing you

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  • Nope. If you aren't hiding anything then she should take your word for it. That is a gross overstep of privacy.

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  • You should ask yourself why you wouldn't tell your girlfriend about who texts and calls you. When you put it the way you did, it makes your girlfriend sound like a control freak. It's one thing to hide a text or call, it's another thing to have to tell your girlfriend whenever you receive a text or call

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  • she has trust issues plain and simple. Either trauma from the past or something else but she doesn't need to know every last person you call or text. If you have a list of like the top 5 people you talk to excluding her and family then tell her gleefully she'll be satisfied. But if you don't go around asking who she's taking to 24/7 put her in place politely and she of she can ease up off you

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  • You dont have to. But u shouldn't hide anything that she can say is cheating. But u need to tell her that u have a private life like her and everyone else. U dont have to show it.

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  • , if you have to tell her who you text, then she should tell you who SHE Texts as well... it's only fair

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  • I don't see the point to do that... For example I trust that my boyfriend handles and girl that hits on him and he trusts me to do the same with boys.

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  • As long as you’re loyal, I personally don’t think you need to tell her absolutely everything, but you should tell her anything you think she should know or anything she might find out on her own and be upset about. If you’re honest with her, she’ll understand, but if she sees you’ve been calling another girl without telling her, that could end badly. Just tell her what you would want to know if you where in her shoes.

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  • It depends on how serious you are with your girlfriend.. If serious means u would love to share every details with your true love

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  • Doesn't sound like someone you should be in a relationship. That's way too much.

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  • Tell her

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What Guys Said 9

  • No, there is no reason to tell her. She is insecure and jealous and sometimes you have to watch out that she is not projecting what she does on you. Meaning she is hiding stuff from you, so she kinda is curious if you are hiding anything from her. Common practice amongst women. The women that cheat the most and are doing things behind a man's back are the women that are most insecure and want to know who is texting, emailing and calling you , lol. Sorry to break the news.. That's the way it works.

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  • Depends on the context.

    If you get a text when the two of you are spending time together and she asks you who it is, then you just pass it off by saying "Nobody". Then you're kind of making it a big deal, by not at least saying "my friend X-name". Or giving her something to work with. Because if she's present with you in the moment doing something and you stop to check your phone, then she has ever right to be curious about it and ask. You don't HAVE TO tell her and tell her everything. But by offering nothing at all you're acting suspiciously.

    Just give her something to work with and she won't feel like you're hiding things from her. If you get a text from a girl named abby, just say "My friend Abby". If your girl asks "what about?". Make a joke out of it, by looking her in the eyes with a smile and say "Why you all up in my BUSINESS GIRL!" Then kiss her.

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    • The vast majority of the time when a girl gets upset about this sort of thing it's not because you're not telling her the specifics. It's because of how you're acting around it. You're making it seem like a big deal and by doing that you are now making it into a big deal. Why wouldn't she act like there is a problem when you are too?

  • Red flag for me - I am very boring and have nothing to hide but I would be more alarmed by her behaviour

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  • I would tell her and show her anything she wants.

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  • No, you shouldn't. My advice is to dump her. You don't sound like you're open enough to be in a good relationship, and she's too insecure.

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  • If theee is nothing truly going on then you hav nothing to hide. Think about how you would feel if your girlfriend was texting guys all day and not telling you

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  • errrr no, i dont do that and my girl doesn't as well. relationships are built on trust

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  • No. She has some trust issues.

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  • Sounds like projection here.

    Chances are she's doing something wrong herself, and immediately thinks you must be doing the same.

    She has no business knowing this sort of information.

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