Is she giving me signs to ask her out?

Question

am in college and have a class with a girl my age. She laughs at stuff I say, smiles a lot at me and to stuff I say. She said hi when she saw me ask what's up. We had to do peer reviews and she came to my table sat next to me at my table. She sat between me and another woman Im friends with, talked to her she said something, smiled at me and looked deep into my eyes and didn't stop smiling and it felt awkward, if I didn't break the eye contact she probably would've continued. One day I sat down waiting for class and sat with another woman and she came in for class walked over and started waiting very close to me, hovering over standing in my personal space, she walked right in front of me and started getting close to me and I could smell her but she had her back to me. This was the closest she's been to me. There was a whole room not a lot of other people it's empty. When I talked about another girl flirting with me and asking for advice from a woman I talk to in college to not lead her on. She joined the conversation said that the other girl will continue pushing boundaries and persisting if I don't say I'm not interested and ignore hrr. She started this stuff after I asked for advice, . I told her someone said my hair looks like the clown from it and she said that's not nice. I'm afraid she knows I'm too nice not say I'm not interested in a girl and won't ignore. She started seeming flirty after giving me advice

Heaz99 · Accepted Answer

The part where you ignored her and she had an attitude. Maybe she was just frustrated that you didn't notice her efforts in trying to get your attention. Though if she has a boyfriend now, I don't know. Study how she acts when she's with him. It could give you a clue as to whether or not she's genuinely happy with him or she (might and I say this as a theory, take it with a grain of salt) be trying to get you jealous somehow. She could just be in a relationship, because she's lonely, she wants to be in a relationship just to be in one or she's trying to get your attention. (Maybe) I hope I'm right because I don't want to give you false hopes, but you seem very in love with this girl! If she was single, I would say, tell her how you feel. If she would've rejected you it's okay, there are a lot of people on this earth.

I know everyone thinks they have one soulmate, but they actually have many and they don't always have to be romantic partners either.

And for the observing part, I'm sorry if that sounds like a crazy Idea, but try it. (your dealing with someone who is going to college to study psychology. I just love observing people and trying to understand why they do what they do! LOL, sorry I can't help myself.)

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

You have described a scenario and stacked the decks so that, imho, there is likely no way that she's not into you. She is. But if you're not interested in her, then... so what? You seem to know how to let them down, so do that.
On this and other posts from guys, I notice a bit of a pattern with no matter what the scenario described, some guys will always think something like "she's playing games - not worth it". Maybe. But don't forget everyone is young once, and they are trying to figure out themselves and how to act, how to be around others, etc. Sounds to me like she likes you and is not a subtle girl. You have your choice on what to do next. She's putting the signals out there. She wants you to meet her halfway? Maybe she'll stop if you don't.

CharlieBadger · Accepted Answer

Yes, she is interested in you.

If you are interested in her ask her out.

If you want to make a good impression have a plan on what to do and or where to eat. Have back ups in case she wants to do / eat something different. Seriously, women like it when a man has his shit together. plans but flexibility.

Now if you aren't interested then I don't know how to help.

Massageman · Accepted Answer

If I understand all your pronouns correctly, it sounds as if the girl in question seems to be pushing her way into your life with little regard about your relationships- regardless of kind.

MrOracle · Answer

LOL. YES, dummy! This girl is obviously showing a lot of interest in you and probably goes home wondering "what more could I do to get my point across?"

When a girl isn't interested in you, she will almost never go out of her way to be physically close to you or give you compliments or give you a lot of attention. This girl is doing all of those things.

You need to flirt with her, and be a bit more overt about your interest in her, and you'll almost certainly see her escalate a bit to match (or, she'll back WAY off in the rare case where she is just being friendly and didn't mean to show romantic interest, but I don't think that's the case here). Assuming she responds positively, then you need to TELL her that you're going to take her on a date.

"You know what? You're awesome. We need to go on a date. If you're free on Saturday, I'll pick you up and we can _______."

If you TELL a girl that you're going to take her out, and if she has any interest in you, she's either going to say "OMG, I'm already committed on Saturday, but how about Sunday/next weekend?" or she's going to say "Yes!" Women respond very positively to confidence, and having the confidence to TELL her instead of just ASKING her will greatly increase your chances of a "yes." Make sure you have an activity that's inexpensive (don't try to impress her by spending money) and where you have lots of time to talk to each other (movies aren't great for this), and have at least 2 backups in case she wants to do the date but really doesn't like the activity. Again, girls don't like having to make the decisions, so you having chosen the activities is likelier to get a positive response.

It's even better if you know some things that she likes already. It shows that you've been paying attention to her and take her preferences into consideration, and most girls will like and appreciate that.

Being "too nice" isn't really a problem of being nice - girls like nice - rather, it's a problem of lacking confidence and trying to make up for that lack of confidence by "letting" her make all the decisions and choices (girls don't actually LIKE making the choices!) and by never telling her "no". It's perfectly possible to be nice and still make most/all of the decisions and to tell her "no" if she's being unreasonable about something - girls actually want and respect that. The solution to being a "nice guy" isn't to be a dick - it's just to have confidence and to make decisions.

nightdrot · Answer

Forgive me. I usually do not respond to these types of questions because there is no way that I can know the things I need to know to make an informed judgment. I do not know the personalities involved. I have no sense of context or history and the only things I do know I am only getting from one side of the aisle so to speak - yours.

However, in this case, I am not even sure of the basis of the question. You go on for a lengthy paragraph describing the numerous ways that she seems to be showing interest in you. Then you ask why "blowing her off" would upset her. Is that not obvious?

She is turning handstands to catch your eye and get your interest. You respond courteously - good for you - but not with any enthusiasm. It seems her reaction is only natural. Frustration, disappointment, etc,

That is how we all react when we don't get what we want - especially when it comes to romance and sex. You are playing - unintentionally - with her feelings and her natural instincts. She probably could respond better and more wisely than she has - but that she is reacting poorly is not really a surprise. (Although, based on what you wrote, her response does not seem to be that bad.
Certainly it could be worse.)

Bottom line, in terms of your own conduct, remember that it is not what you want to say, it is what the other person to hear. So be clear in your own mind about what you want, and then find a way to express it that will take into account how she is feeling and therefore how she will react to it.

Best of luck.

Anonymous · Answer

I'll be blunt, reading that made ME feel uncomfortable, specifically the time and effort you took write that out in such detail... If you didn't care about it you wouldn't ask.

Stopping what your doing to go take a pic of her low cut shirt your friend told you she's wearing... that's in the realm of WTF. .. Don't get me wrong, everyone loves a nice pair of sweaterpuppies but... By saying it rudely I mean to be helpful- Ya might wanna tone that down a bit.

I get the feeling you might be projecting... and in some way are looking for validation or confirmation that she's into you by asking us about it here... Lotta folks aren't aware when they are doing it.
I could be wrong.

Direct answer- It's been heavily studied and proven that women are better at not only verbal and phonetic communication (inflection, tone, rate of speech, emphasis placement), but are much better at the nuances of body language and facial expression.. Most of communication isn't the message itself... That being said. yeah dude she knows.

SMPlSl · Answer

Hmm, i can't tell if she's trying to het your attention now, but it seems like she was before, and for a quite a long time at that. I bet she was crushing on you a bit. I'm getting the impression that you're crushing on her as well. If that's the case I'd recommend talking to her and hanging out. She probably won't act the same as she once did if she has a boyfriend because it might be considered too flirty, but but talking to her and assessing her body language you might be able to pick up if she still likes you, if not romantically then at least as a friend.

purify · Answer

Sorry to break this to you but she has a sexual interest in you, that's her underlying intention not a crush. She's trying to win you over that's why you're seeing her strange behavior toward you that's making you feel uncomfortable that you are still trying to be a gentleman and at the same time avoiding her/ not reciprocating her attention toward you. She's being very clever showing that she all into you to lower your defenses to get what she wants. What's great is your intuition is telling you otherwise, listen to it, you'll avoid a big headache.

Aguysopinion4799 · Answer

Well I mean, from the description, it sounds like she is trying REALLY hard to get your attention so if you try and ignore it or show your discomfort, I assume that annoys her in that she is trying to get close to you, almost at an obsessive level?

From the way you explained this, it sounds like she is really fixated on you and if it is making you uncomfortable, you should say something which I hope will reduce her frequent attempts of obsessing over you.

She might change her tactic and become more mellow, possibly even become friends, or she will amp it up and become seriously difficult to handle, it can only go really well or really bad..

LoU_Hades · Answer

relax man.
As I worked in a company with 20 women in office and I was then only young boy there, I've got every day lot of similar shit in first months. But I am an asshole and I didn't fear any confrontation and escalation.
Some of those women who showed me their feminine qualities got discouraged as I begun to treat them like cheap sluts with decent but lewd remarks, other started to joking about and we remained in a 'lewd slut to another one' status quo. Those who were really interested threaded me really nice and very friendly, but never that specific way.

You must know, women love "who is the biggest slut" competition, especially in a bigger group. You seem to be perfect 'object' where she can play this game.

Bananaman177 · Answer

That's some great stream-of-consciousness poetry you wrote there, but can you tell me which line or lines contain the point? Or some fact?

I'm not going to sit here and read "50 Shades of she stared at me and then one time I didn't stare at her and then this other time, she could see me and she totally was staring at me."

Motherfucker, GET TO THE POINT!!! The fuck are you yammering about? If I was your bro, I would smack you in the back of the head and tell you to start over and leave out all the bullshit this time.

victoriaxoxo · Answer

Ok. So I don’t feel like she has done anything excessive to show you that she likes you yet. You need to evaluate her character and see if she naturally friendly and it might be that she was just genuinely giving you advise. Maybe mix yourself into a situation where she is chatting with you and a bunch of other guys and see if she seems to pay particular attention to you (like are her responses more detailed and longer when she speaks to you, does she seem to follow up on what you say, her physical proximity to you when you’re chatting as opposed to other guys). For now play it kool.

AlphaBob · Answer

This is going to be really harsh bro so here's you're chance stop reading right now. YOU WERE A LITTLE BITCH! WE ARE SEXUAL CREATURES! SHE PUT HERSELF OUT THERE!!! SHE TRIED AND WHAT DID YOU DO? PROBABLY WENT HOME AND BEAT you're MEAT! haha its ok though if you weren't ready you weren't ready its perfectly ok. Its better to actually use you're brain then to use you're cock. The faster the better though if you got a good grasp on reality start as young as possible but really make sure you have a good grasp on reality. Think of some sexual things or whatever and ask you're self is that ok? If it sounds fucked it probably is don't do it.

talloak · Answer

If she has a boyfriend, I'm not sure what options are available to you. That is, if she has a crush on you or not, what can you do about it? Most people act annoyed when people who know them ignore them or give them strange looks. You can't go by that. All I can suggest is to be friendly to her, expecting little in return. If things don't work out with the boyfriend, perhaps you would have a shot.

iamchrissy · Answer

Hmmm sounds a little stalkerish... Why is she everywhere you go? 😂 But ya I mean judging from what you wrote she obviously fancies you. A lot. And anyone would be a little upset if their crush didn't like them back. And the high pitched voice part, I can't explain but a lot of people do. It's kind of like a flirty little tease.

Justme987 · Answer

Definitely likes you, but be careful. I had an experience with an older women when I was 19. She was 40 something. On a night out, we talked, drank, kissed and then she prominently took charge sexualy. I'll be honest... I loved it. She loved it. She was a nurse and knew EXACTLY what she was doing. Long story short and no details, she left me mind blown and in heaven lol. No regrets here lol. Bless her she was amazing.

Dextrosis · Answer

Depends what you want from a relationship and a significant other.

One of the biggest mistakes I've made was get into a relationship just because an attractive person showed interest in me.

If she's trying to get your attention like that it's usually because her body produces pleasure when she's around you and your attention gives her validation and an ego boost.

She's essentially into you, but she's in it for her.

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

Since you're the one ignoring her, I'd say it's you who "gave up", and not her. And she got a boyfriend because you didn't make a move after all that time. Not sure what other outcome you were expecting from this. Just meet other girls, continue being pleasant around her when you do interact, and your lack of neediness may be enough to give her second thought. If she's happy with her boyfriend either way, then just take it as a lesson. Strike while the iron's hot next time.

HeavyRoller · Answer

Well, trust your vibe. Based on what you described she is sending out a number of signals that she's interested. If you're not interested back then politely let her know. If she gets upset that's ok, she's probably embarrassed at your rejection. If she gets REALLY upset then take it to the school for help.

BattleKitten77 · Answer

You are in college. I think you need to learn some basic grammar instead of worrying about her. You are a fuccking moron. This is the stupidest thi g i have ever read. At no time in this rambling incoherent monologue have you managed to put together one single sentence that made sense.

LaVillaStrangiato · Answer

I meannnn. She doesn't NOT like you. The only way you're going to find out is to up your game a little bit, flirt with her for a couple weeks to see how she engages with you, then ask her out.
If she says yes - then great! Move on from there.
If she says no - then you won't be wasting your time chasing. Be friends and maybe ask her again after you get to know each other better.

demonics · Answer

When women try to flirt 101 lol. She's got a Reddit post out there someone "WhY IsN'T hE pIcKinG uP oN mY HiNtS?"

Yandere (plural yanderes)-

(chiefly Japanese fiction) A character, usually a girl, who fits the archetype of being genuinely kind, loving, or gentle, but suddenly switching to being aggressive or deranged, often homicidally so.
(chiefly Japanese fiction) A character, usually a girl, who is violently obsessed with their crush.

She's a creeper dude!

samael_kmarty · Answer

Hey it can be some of these reasons
* She likes you
* She is in love with you
* Its her natural way of talking
* She is trying to sell you something by getting close to you.
* Trying to be friends with you cause you look cool , or some other reasons (only you know that reason)
* You have a great personality and want to steal it by you know getting your weakness
* She might be madly in love with you.

Is she giving me signs to ask her out?

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