How do you talk to women when you have nothing to say?

I asked one of my friends whom rejected me about a month back why she said no; apparently I joke around too much and tease her to the point where it's repetitive. Seems kinda like I'm being fake, and I agree, but I only do it because I don't know what else to talk about. Never do this with my guy friends since men usually lead convos, I guess. Easier to click with guys and keep the talking going.

In HS I was socially retarded so I took on the role of the class clown, kinda just dicked around all the time, never took anything seriously. Couldn't even form deep relationships with dudes let alone women, got lucky enough that I had a few dates though surprisingly.

I've changed a lot since, but when I have nothing to say with a girl or don't know what to do, I guess I kinda fall back into that same ol behavior.
I know women appreciate men who are mature and don't joke around all the time, I don't think I do, (otherwise we wouldn't even be friends or hang out right?)
So how do I get about changing this? I know practice makes perfect and I know what the issue is, so that's a start. But I could use some more help.
She's been really understanding since she used to be the same, and I told her to let me know when I'm doing it; but I can't get all my advice from her. Already probably bothered her enough with it. Surprised she didn't even let me know til recently, not that it's some gigantic character flaw, but still...

I wanna be a better person and less like some immature douche who doesn't know when to quit. But it's just automatic for me when I don't know how to act or what to say.
How do you talk to women when you have nothing to say?
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