Why do women wear obviously sexually-implied/intentioned clothing and then lash out when they receive unwanted attention, labels, and behavior?

Question

Labels can mean “whore,” “slut,” “hoe,” etc.

Behavior can be anything from catcalling to unwanted/unwarranted/inappropriate touching

I’m not saying clothing is a complete and accurate synopsis of one’s personality in all its totality, but it is an indicator of certain insights, interests, and behaviors of a person that someone can reasonably predict. We all make judgements about people all the time from a variety of cues and traits they give off and possess. A person’s clothing does say something about a person and depending on what they’re specifically wearing it can say quite a lot about them without you having to meet or talk them in any significant manner.

For example, a man wearing an all black t-shirt with the swastika/nazi symbol, in red, in the center of the t-shirt says quite a bit about this person without much else. It would be incredibly confusing if you decided to come up to this man and question him on why he’s wearing the t-shirt he’s wearing and he gives you such an answer that is in direct conflict or opposition to what the swastika/nazi symbol means. You find yourself thinking incredibly different about them once you figure out why he’s wearing the t-shirt he’s wearing, but nonetheless caused some confusion.

For the topic at hand, imagine a woman is at a club and she’s wearing very revealing and sexually-implied/intentioned clothing.

To paint a more vivid picture, imagine she has large breasts and what she’s wearing is a very thin, practically see-through bra or top. You can clearly see her nipples, despite being poorly covered up. She’s also wearing very short and tight shorts that look almost like underwear.

What do you think all of this says about this person? Would you be right to think of this woman in certain manners due to her clothing? What would insights on her character be? Do you think she is looking for certain attention?

Updates

+1 y

https://youtu.be/ymNdfdQvdVc

Dave Chappelle voices a similar confusion/sentiment that I would agree with when it comes to this issue.

Watch from the 4:00 mark and slightly beyond

Updates

+1 y

On a side note, anyone going to watch Narcos Mexico season 2 today? Lol

I sure am

TonyBologna25 · Accepted Answer

Those girls are funny man lol. When I was bouncing at nightclubs and bars during my college years, I’d see this kind of thing a lot. They like the attention, but only from certain guys. Most of them I’d assume feel insecure if it’s a regular thing. They feel as if the only kind of attention they’re worth is sexual, so they exploit that without actually wanting to be harassed.

A lot of them also like to play victim in these situations as it gives them what they actually want... more attention. Any kind of attention they can get.

It’s beyond me as to how a woman can defy logic so blatantly when I get into debates about this on gag. Let’s wear clothing specifically designed to accentuate and bring an extreme amount of attention to our sexual assets, and then get mad when people approach us and look at us in a sexual way. 😂

People will always judge you based on how you dress and carry yourself. If I grow out my hair, wear sweatpants everyday, worn out shoes, and graphic tshirts... people will assume I’m a under achieving stoner. Just how the world works.

Don’t want to be treated like a slut? Don’t dress like one. If you dress like a prostitute every weekend, then I’ll assume you’re a slut.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

Some women have a conflict between what they actually want and what they are willing to admit to themselves about what they want. Great video!

ChronicThinker · Answer

Behaviour is one thing.

The second you commit a crime, I'm sorry, but nothing she wears gives you a right to go up to some scandalous-looking 15-year-old and grab her pussy. And if you think that's a justification, you're sick.

However, if you have your titties falling out and people try to ask you to hook up? Okay, I get that. Nonetheless, no matter how someone looks, the average, reasonable person should never violate your basic human rights and make you feel uncomfortable, threatened, harassed, or in danger.

But, not all guys are like that. There are sickos out there. There's responsibility on both sides.

victoriaxoxo · Answer

I will start with the easiest points:

Regarding the woman being curvy or her breasts being prominent, this is not the woman’s fault. By this I mean, she probably can’t control how curvy her body is naturally so requiring her to cover up because her body is curvier than others and because this is deemed sexual in today’s society is very restrictive. Secondly she might not be fully aware of how attractive you perceive her curves to be (and she doesn’t need to be made aware as it might make her uncomfortable and self conscious). Her body to her might not be so much an object of desire but just her body. She might just not see the things the way you see it. Plenty of things men expose that women find irresistible but men might not see it in that light. So should she cover up because your sexual preference make her an object of attraction?

Now the trickier parts;

Regarding how she dresses, it is a more complicated issue since the woman makes a conscious choice in how she wants to dress up that day. The above sort of explained the instances where a woman is not aware that her body is seen by some as very sexual or where she has such a body which looks very sexual regardless of what she wears. Now with choosing what to wear, there are multitude of reasons why someone chooses to dress in the way they do, some examples are:
- to imitate their favourite celebrity
- to dress for an event (to fit in with the crowd)
- to dress correctly for the specific location (again to fit in with her idea of how most people will be dressed there)
- to show off a new sense of style to her friends
- to remind herself that she can look attractive/ sexy (like a post relationship GNO)
- to seduce specific man/woman (for example her bf/gf)
- to grab attention (but in the form of compliments so to feel good about herself)
- to seduce a random man

There are many more reasons for why someone can choose to dress a certain way but so many of them are not the woman intentionally being a tease and definitely not good reasons to justify sexual harassment.

A better suited analogy to what you said would be seeing a man wearing a baseball jersey and approaching that man to talk about baseball and him saying that he is not such a fan but he is just wearing it to look cool but then still pestering him about baseball and he is like ‘no dude I am really not that into baseball’ but then going further and just starting to throw baseballs at him hoping that he is secretly into baseball and will start batting them back. Do you see my point?

kymberz · Answer

ok. let's take a walk down memory lane... ever heard of belly dancers? ballerinas? cage/stage/floor dancers? they are there to motivate the crowd kinda' like cheerleaders! i am not talking about strippers - they play a completely different role and let's thank the world for them eh? cuz they have kept many a man sane! no i am talking about ancient things - and dancers! and all women used to dance for their men and then a bunch of them forgot! and what the hell is sexually-implied clothing? men get turned on by librarians and secretaries and teachers so your whole train of thought/stream of consciousness/question gets blown to sh*t by that! so buddy - i like you and you know it - so freakin explain what the hell you are on about?

and normal everyday women feel good when they dress up and maybe if men appreciated that more they wouldn't dress sexually and they lash out because they are just trying to be a fantasy and there is nothing more to that... then... well... that! good question, my friend but don't make me have to come down there with the sh*t kicking boots on ok?

Anonymous · Answer

Because they want only "top-quality" attention. Its like this: You post a photo in booty shorts with half your butt out, you feel sexy f and you now want people to validate that you are sexy. But if a bunch of guys who are average or less than average, who would just post thirsty comments on any girl's posts, comment, you would not like it. You would feel repulsed because you don't find them sexually attractive and their comment indicates that they would possibly like to do it with you, hence = they would feel creepy and unsolicited to you. Girls never mind other girls commenting on their pic," damnn that ass mami" because girls don't post thirsty comments on any girl's photos, quite the contrary, so it's a massive compliment to know that you are sexy even to fellow girls ( who have high standards as girls usually have, compared to guys).
Then comes handsome guys, they are also top quality because guys like this won't comment on ANY girl's post and they don't have dearth of girls wanting them, and it's a compliment that they find you sexy out of the lot. But if even a handsome guy acts too thirsty, it will look creepy because he is now acting desperate.
Then comes the average, or less than average guys. When girls post such photos they don't want this lot's attention, or even if they do, it has to be relegated to only liking that pic and making yourself scarce. Its the same way in real life. Girls that wear over the top sexy clothes want attention and compliments but only from other girls and handsome dudes, not other guys. So thats why when a average or ugly dude stares at them or hits on them, it feels creepy because the feeling of knowing this person wants to bang you repulses them.

coolhandroo · Answer

Its called provocative because it is meant to provoke a sexual response. And it does. And it doesn't give us the right to touch them inappropriately and cat calling might be class-less but staring is absolutely to be expected and the only reason chicks would dress that way and then act like funds is because they are trying feel better about themselves and feel like if they get attention and then shoot it down in an annoyed or humiliating way it will make them look that much better than if they were gracious with accepting the compliment. In fact it doesn't make them appear cool or superior or hard to get or any of the things they are trying to convey it just makes them look like bitches. It's a bully mentality the same way physically strong but mentally and emotionally weak boys pick on physically weak ones. I respect neither kind. Even if the reason they are rude is because they feel out od the league of then men making comments or clearly infatuated its still a cunt move. Like saying I was lucky enough to be born a 7 you are clearly a 5 so you aren't worth my manners. Women who are truly beautiful or truly confident dont need slutty clothes or to be a bitch to every man that compliments them or lacks the seductive qualities to approach properly. Not entirely by chance you will find that the booty short crowd will always find a way to hate on the classy beautiful confidant woman because they know that at any point she could steal any man from them. An insecure 7 hates a confident 9 like you would not believe

Anonymous · Answer

The predominant reason? Cause they either like the attention or they're insecure & "need" the attention. The ideology is interchangeable in many ways. Some could say it's because they like showing off. Sure... but that's just attention-seeking.

Stylish & fashionable clothes gain more respect - from other women & men alike - than barely-there shorts & a shirt that's more like a bra. Attractive women will still get catcalled dressed fashionably but at least it'd be few & far between and more typically among the least desirable instead of every 2nd guy or 3rd guy miss teeny shorts would receive unwanted attention from.

Take it from someone who was approached by modeling agencies in college. I'm, to be blunt, striking particularly during the summer when thanks to a fluke of dad's Mediterranean ancestry I don't burn like many would think. Lightly tanned skin, reddish light-brown hair & grey eyes. All-natural. The only time I use 'makeup' is special events & that's solely lip-gloss.

I don't wear revealing clothing. Never have, never will. Don't need to, to turn heads. Do I get catcalled? Yes. But I can count the number of guys who have done it on one hand. Most guys are more respectful cause they realize catcalling isn't gonna gain any favor from a classy woman where it may a trampy woman.

ChgzDaniel · Answer

Because women like to look sexy... but our minds aren't wired to understand that sexy is the same thing we do as trying to attract a mate. We have a level of innocence that men don't have. We live in a totaly different reality to them. Plus, we have an ego that says we can't do anything wrong so when we're called out on it we point the finger at you rather than ourselfs.

archiz · Answer

You can form an opinion on someone sure but it's different when you act on it, that becomes on you.
I still don't get why it is so hard for guys to grasp that wearing revealing clothes doesn't mean this person is into sexual assault or rape.
And that's what it is really, an assault unless she points it out that she wants you.
It's very simple, what she does with her body is HER choice. What you decide to do with HER body is an issue lmao. Noticed the emphasis on "hers"?
Just control your dicks for f**** sake.

lumos · Answer

What I don't get is why people feel the need to call strangers certain things or touch strangers in a certain way just because of what they are wearing.

I could not give less of a flying fuck about what others are wearing. Not my issue. I'm not gonna call them names or walk up to them and assume they want to be touched a certain way without even saying hi to them first. Like, calling someone names or randomly grabbing their ass is in my opinion way fucking weirder than dressing in a low cut top or tight jeans. I think that says way more about the harasser than the person who's being harassed.

Y'all care way too much about things that don't even affect you lol. Why would anyone with even some manners want to shout anything at strangers? Y'all are fucking weird.

aspiegirl_ · Answer

No, the answer is no. At least I don't do that.

And even if a girl wears shorts, skirts, dresses, etc, that may look "provocative" that doesn't give guys the permission to touch their buttocks, or say stupid things like "Damn, you look hot. Look at those boooobs! " That's annoying. Personally, I don't get dressed that way, but still, guys keep saying those things to me or they touch my buttocks and I hate it. So what happens is that people don't respect. That's it. And no one should label other for their style

zoe2187 · Answer

Don’t be fooled. We do it for attention. If a women gets the reaction she’s after from a guy she’s dressing for you’ll never hear her complain. It’s women with big egos that lash out when they get attention from guys they feel don’t fit their high standards.

SirRexington · Answer

I've brought up this piece of hypocrisy from women numerous times. I'm not sure why they do it, other than that they are taught feminist values are preferred. And feminism is inherently hypocritical and contradictory. They don't want to be sexualized or objectified but then shame people who criticize then for exploiting their sexuality. They want to supposedly desexualize their breasts (I don't) yet they support sexual empowerment, don't wear bras and and encourage women to flaunt and be proud of their sexuality. They hate men viewing women as nothing but sex objects but then sexualize themselves to the point where they are not worthy of being anything else other than a sex object.

Daniela1982 · Answer

They want to show off but don't want anyone to realize that they are showing off and craving the attention and validation. So when someone notices they assume they know the score so act insulted. And some just revel in it and pretend to be insulted but are smiling inside.

Why do women wear obviously sexually-implied/intentioned clothing and then lash out when they receive unwanted attention, labels, and behavior?

He's checking my boobs out. Yes!!

Oh good! The guys are looking. I'll have to pretend I'm embarrassed.

foriWish · Answer

Because it is our right to our bodies to wear whatever the fuck we want. However, that doesn't mean people have the right to hurt us because of it. Wearing revealing clothing (even being naked) doesn't give people the right to violate, harass, or even kill the person over it.

Funny thing is, it doesn't even take a woman to wear sexual or revealing clothing to be catcalled, touched inappropriately, raped, beaten, etc. All it takes for those things to happen is an attractive easy target (women in general). Additionally, the word "attractive" is VERY subjective; therefore, ANY woman can be deemed attractive or wanted for a guy to violate periodt.

RolandCuthbert · Answer

I wish I could go back in time and talk to myself when I was 24 years old.

Women do things for attention. Some want you to hit on them and pursue them romantically. Others just want to be seen, it doesn't matter if they are with another guy or not. It is important to them to know they can attract a man's attention. Some want to trick you. It is fun to toy with guys and then pretend to be disinterested.

Women come in a lot of different shapes, sizes, and motivations. You can't put them all in the same box. The problem is that young men are too serious when they are approaching them. Turn the tables.

Your examples make no sense. A woman wearing all black with a swastika is sending similar messages as a guy.

As for a woman wearing a getup like that. I don't understand the issue. I am quite certain she knows what she is doing and what kind of attention she is inviting. If she doesn't or better yet pretends she doesn't, why is that a concern?

Kaneki05 · Answer

I mean well course if they come in looking like stripper lol. But most girls get called stuff when they ain't even showing anything and look decent.
like girls on nights out normal just show there legs and maybe ther back and maybe a little bit of the assets.

if they showed, more than i would say your right, it depends how much there showing but most girls don't. It's like if a have a see through shirt and just a bra that would be something i would class as showing to much, so there clearly doing that for attension even if they don't want that attension verbally said to them. But again most girls don't.

slatyb · Answer

"Why do women wear obviously sexually-implied/intentioned clothing and then lash out when they receive unwanted attention, labels, and behavior?"

Because those comments and that behavior is inappropriate and is not excused because some guy thought her clothing was suggestive. There's a great video that shows a guy in a police station after he was mugged and robbed of his ring, watch, and wallet. The officer is asking him "What did you think would happen when you walked down the street in a $2000 suit, with a $5000 watch and diamond ring out in plain sight? Didn't you think someone might notice that? Seems like pretty poor judgment, don't you think? You were sort of asking to be robbed, weren't you?

Wemix · Answer

Just like to point out that even in modest clothing girls get catcalled, sexually harassed and even raped.
If you walk in front of a psychopath your simple existence will be triggering to him, same thing with guys who think it's normal to force a girl into something she doesn't want just because her presence was triggering to him.

Now there are girls who dress a certain way because they're attention whores, but there are also girls with a banging body who really even in the most modest clothing you'll still be able to tell she's hot. And believe it or not, a lot of guys see through all those clothes and will claw desperately.

wankiam · Answer

a woman choosing to wear sexy clothing is an invite to be looked at maybe but its not an invite to be catcalled which incidentally is classed as a hate crime in the uk... if you can't control yourself at the sight of a sexy woman i suggest you take some lessons in self control because here attire is no defence in court anymore. you can think what you like in your own head but you dont have the right to voice it basically

Anonymous · Answer

People don't want to accept the consequences of their actions. Whether or not it's "right" or "fair", the fact is that people will judge you for how you present yourself, and there's nothing you can do about it. If you don't care, by all means keep doing what you want, but if you do, the only way to change people's perceptions is change how you present yourself.

In a perfect world, people would be able to do what they want and not be judged for it. Unfortunately, this isn't a perfect world and you can't change society. It really boils down to how much you care about what other people think, but even if you care very little or not at all, it can still backfire on you in certain settings and situations.

Why do women wear obviously sexually-implied/intentioned clothing and then lash out when they receive unwanted attention, labels, and behavior?

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