How do I recognize when women are "just joking"?

I feel like such a buzzkill when women get upset with me for not recognizing that they were "just joking" or "just messing" with me.

It's not that I can't recognize a joke or cannot take a joke; It's that their jokes that I'm unable to read are often at my expense. The "joke" is either that I'm doing something wrong or that the person is going to do something I don't like.

"You're too serious" is a phrase I often hear from the women I speak to. On the contrary, I think the women I speak to play too much.


1. I had a friend over to watch movies and I ordered pizza. I opened it near her side on the coffee table but it didn't give her much room to put her plate, so while I was in the middle of making space and moving the box over, she interrupts this process and goes "-That needs to stay over here!" This catches me off guard in the middle of doing it, so naturally I'm like "What? What do you mean? Why?" She was joking. "You should learn not to take everything I say seriously." I then explained that she interrupted an automatic process, so I didn't get it. She then gave me a look like I had ruined the moment. Granted, I recognized that it had been, however I argue that we wouldn't have been in that situation had she not tried to "joke with me" at precisely that moment.

2. A new friend and I are chatting online. She mentions that she isn't motivated by money and that she is motivated by helping people and having them reach their goals. So I said "So you're one those people who puts others before themselves." She says "Eww, what? no." I said "Oh, I'm sorry. I misinterpreted what you were saying. I'm still learning to put myself 1st." She goes a step further and says "yeah, total misinterpretation." So I'm like "my bad, I was hoping to relate on the subject." THEN she says she was joking. The convo turned awkward. I don't get how we go from serious subject to immediately joking without any cues.

(I'm running out of room to type more examples. Help me!! Lol)
How do I recognize when women are "just joking"?
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