I felt like you need to do all these steps to impress them when all I want is one to appreciate a simple hello. That’s what I did with a girl at my church and we ended up having nice convos. All I did was introduce myself in a genuine way I mean hopefully that works for more girls.
Well then I don't understand why you even asked this question when in your example you ended up having a nice conversation with the girl you approached.
I feel most girls are too critical at my age. That’s what it comes off. Like if I were to approach a girl on a store and do that; she’d probs would be creeped out for whatever reason or annoyed. I don't know of the girl that I had a good convo with was because of me just introducing myself or because she’s more mature since she’s a few years older. Would you say because of her age or because of what I said is why it went well?
Why do you need an example? I think seeing vids on YouTube explaining how you need to approach women with steps 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 etc.. with perfection is proof enough that women are too critical when it comes to approaching.
Because you asked the question, so don’t you have any personal examples?
No personal problems, just experiences. Let’s just say women show to be so contradicting and others with too high of an ego or just not knowing what they want. Didn’t mean to come off rude before by the way.
I mean one time I smiled at a girl and she was smiling back but, when I approached her she came off as creeped out. Another, ran when I started talking. I just want to know if women my age can appreciate a simple” hello and would you like to hang out sometime”. Also without having to use creepy mind tricks like some people have said before. how would you approach a woman and how has that gone cause I feel I can’t just be myself and be honest when I approach them.
Ty for giving personal examples, nope you were not rude.In general don’t approach a woman when you want something. They are so used to guys wanting something the moment they feel that energy, well you see the result. Instead clear your head of any goal or outcome and just say hi. Those YouTube vids are a joke, they take you away from being authentic.Tbh the best approaches I’ve had was walking up to say hi, chatting for less than 5 minutes, then walking away. No number, no date, it wasn’t transactional.
by the way if a total stranger (guy or girl) approached you and said ‘hi, wanna hang out sometime’ wouldn’t you feel creeped out? You know nothing about them other than what they look like.
I feel ya, I have commented before that the YouTube vids were kinda bull. I’ve also done that where I just give a compliment if she’s walking by or if o saw one at the gym I’ll maybe give a compliment. I think she kinda dug me too (one at the gym), but o feel if I were to ask for her number or something then she’d all of a sudden be creeped out. I mean is being yourself not a good thing or something?
FYI this took practice. When I first got the guts to approach it was so awkward and I failed a lot, like couldn’t even speak
The gym is a great example. Just say hi, share some story about a piece of equipment or an exercise, then excuse yourself to go back to work out. Then if you see her again next week do it again. She will start to see you as consistent, reliable, and friendly. Then you will feel more confident and could ask her to hang out.
That’s a great point I mean my mom even said the you need a natural environment ya know. There’s a girl at my Church and I’ve noticed her for awhile and I eventually decided to go up and literally just say “hi, I thought I’d introduce myself my names victor” and it went well and she seems interested. I guess I haven’t really gone with that exact genuine approach before. I guess if I’m out at a supermarket or something that it’s moving too fast to really have a natural convo. I mean would just doing a natural approach (like I mentioned before) work? Cause I thought that the girl at my church appreciated it since she’s a few years older and more mature.
Do you think it was my genuine approach or the fact that she’s more mature is why the convos with her went well.
You got it. Yes, throw away any tricks because they take your brain away from being in the moment. Women want to feel a connection, that’s when they gain interest. If you are acting creepy, deceptive, trying to trick them.. that prevents them from connecting to you. So yes, talk to the church girl again and see if you share any common interests. Yes, if you notice someone in the checkout line buying the same fruit as you buy ask them about it. The more you just spark conversations with strangers the easier it gets to just be yourself.
Well honestly you never know what’s happening in that persons life, regardless of her being mature. Someone could have just lost a loved one, or someone may have just celebrated a raise. Keep this in mind: anyone who rejects you quickly isn’t rejecting you, they are rejecting what you represent to them.. so let them go and move on.
I got you, I feel it’s women specifically my age that are hard to talk to but, I guess just stay genuine right?
Always be honest and genuine in life bro. #yolo, we have no time to be fake
True, i was gonna see where the whole thing goes with the girl at church and if it doesn't work out then try the methods we talked right? Or should I try to talk to a few and see who I click with?
Also if I’m walking around at my job or something and I see a girl they’ll maybe look at me and I’ll look back but they look away or maybe even start walking in another direction does that mean they think I’m good looking or are they like “stay away”
Don’t ever just focus on one person and exclude others until you actually enter a committed relationship. Until then be open to meeting new people. Keep in mind you don’t just meet others for romance, it could be friendship/business/entertainment/hobbies.. it’s always better to expand your social network when you can
At your job , do your job. Be social outside of work
Cool man, thanks for the advice. Much appreciated
You are welcome
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What’s the right way?
Cause I feel that I’m polite and calm.
I feel most women my age are.
Doesn’t matter what you feel. It’s not reality.
So if I approached a girl and said “hi I’m victor, I think you’re really pretty, do you want to hang out sometime”(paraphrasing) she wouldn’t be creeped out or anything?
Depends on the girl. Everyone has their own reactions and reasonings for them.
I don't know I feel they are especially seeing vids on how you NEED to approach them in this way, with this angle, and say this, but don’t do that, and make sure you you express that. I feel that’s so much to just say hi to a woman and ask if she’d like to hang out. It’s hard to at at least my age.
Whoever came up with those videos made them for the views, the more views they get the more money they make. It tricks people into thinking there’s some magical way to approach a woman so they watch it when in reality it’s BS and all you have to do is be a decent guy and not be weird about the interaction and that’s it..
I don't know I feel that if I try to approach them by just saying “hi and would you like to hang out sometime” and be myself, I feel that won’t work
You don’t know until you find out
And actually be physically attractive to her.
@Louistruman19 I believe I am but, I feel girls don’t worry about that as much as you’d think
How would you want a guy to approach you
I honestly wouldn’t mind as long as he isn’t cocky or douchey lol
LoL so any approach is solid then?