Why do I get so anxious about my girlfriend cheating when she isn't around or doubt her stories?

Anonymous
One time last year she said, "I could cheat on you, and you'd never know." She makes dumb jokes like that, more so before than now, because she's retarded when it comes to Emotional Quotient. She also told me her sex drive was so high before that just one guy wasn't enough for her, and she needed multiple dudes in one night to satisfy her. When we sleep together, I last like 1-2 hours, but she acts like it's never enough. At the same time, she could go literally weeks without sex and be fine, while I get more and more interested, so to speak. Birth control has calmed it down a lot, but that's always in the back of my head, I guess. "What if she's out getting dicked down, because she don't get enough at home?" Even so, I wanna fuck more than her, it seems.

This isn't a low-value thing, even though it feels like a low-value behavior. I'm seriously tense when she's not around. I don't know if her presence just calms me or what; but, when she's gone, I get real fucking tense. I guess I just doubt her loyalty, even though she knows I'm way more valuable than her.

Is this codependence? But I love going to the gym without her. Maybe it's just because I don't have anything to do after last semester. I should preoccupy myself or something, yeah?

At the same time, when she's gone (and I haven't released, so to speak, in awhile) I start craving other chicks, too. It's very confusing. I also know I'm a lot better deal for her than she is for me, so sometimes my mind wanders to "Maybe there's someone out there better for me."

But, we live together, and our relationship is pretty great. If I get upset, she gets crushed; and, she's always very worried I'm going to leave, but seems absolutely fine when she's out and about. It's all very weird.
Why do I get so anxious about my girlfriend cheating when she isn't around or doubt her stories?
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