Congratulations Lidepi, you just became my new best friend. You fucking nailed it! And because of the bullshit non-sense that women do to us "nice guys", it's all the more reason why I don't talk to women anymore.
Now at days us guys might as well get a 1 night fling, look at porn or cough up a shit load of cash just to afford an escort. If those ladies complain about us guys doing that, I could only say "What are you complaining about? You weren't interested in me in the first place all because I'm not your type nor am I a ladies man/pretty boy, so there's no reason for you to complain".
I could perhaps talk to women, but I'll be damned if I'm going into the friendzone.
You could also travel to East or Southeast Asia where Westerners, particularly white men, experience the 'Charisma Man' effect! The girls right there basically throw themselves at you. This is based on all the books I've read and people I've talked to! And the girls are of faaaaaaaaaaar higher quality than those in the West.
I looooove that post! It's so true! Even though I'm pretty sure I probably did it... But everything that's being said in that article is very true. Thumbs to the person who wrote it! We all needed that wakeup call!
Unfortunately, most woman are attracted to the bad boys! It isn't until you get a bit older and realize what is important .......then you like the attentive guy who will hold your hand.........who is calm, caring, knows how to communicate................
Interesting. This is what PUA's say but they say it a little different. They say you guys are basically settling and warning guy's if they don't master the art of getting women etc then this will happen to them.
I don't think I overlook nice guys. In fact, I have a crush on one. But to a degree this article is true for both genders, women tend to do this more to the nice guys. Realistically speaking, there are many times when being nice is not what makes a girl's heart throb for a guy. Honestly speaking, I don't think I do this. I honestly do believe I fall for the nice guys.
When I first start to like someone, I try to figure out his flaws first to see if I can handle it. accept them.
This sounds like where I'm at right now. I'm on the fringe with her. She's my best friend and she recently got cheated on and she tried to work it out(which I applaud her for trying). I've been there for her through thick and thin. Now single, she turns me down because she doesn't see me in the romantic sense. But she loves me. In the platonic sense. Great article and I'm a nice guy that's not gonna become the asshole because of a woman just to get laid.
Fair to an extent--but at the same time, men are just as guilty of this. I was a nice girl who men didn't want to be with, I suppose because I wasn't aggressive enough. I met and married a nice guy and so did a lot fo my friends. As I have said in my previous posts, it is not that women don't want a nice guy, it is that they want a certain type of nice guy just as a ,man wants a certain type of nice girl--besides, are we not to blame for our folly of letting someone abuse our love?
In some ways it is true. But it also goes the other way around. I stopped dating for 2 years after a heart break, finally trusted someone again, that supposedly was a very sweet guy, treated me great, then one day he just stops talking to me. He went back to his ex that cheated on him. It made me realize that men just love b***hes. So basically, when you meet a bi**ch just know that there is some "nice guy" that made her that way.
I dont think he ever healed from it, like when i was cheated on while engaged. Honestly it still follows me in some way, I would not date her again but it change people and it may be so deam hard to accept that change. Took me close to 6 years to accept it as not my fault.
My first boyfriend and love was exactly what you just described: Followed me around like a lost puppy, was there for me when I was emotionally hurting, and always tried to take care of me. Then, after of almost 2 years of dating he dumped me because people told him I was too clingy. Even if you date a nice guy he can still turn into an asshole.
What you should be saying is you won't waste another moment on a girl like that, even for revenge, and you will reserve all the kindness, door opening and flower giving to the girl who loves you, appreciates you and treats you like a king as I do my own "nice" man. Sure--Chad may get all the babes, you may be 35 when it happens, but who cares! Wouldn't you rather have something real than to say you scored with 100 brainless Buffy's? Think about THAT and get off the bitter rants...!
Besides, don't you think it is entirely possible that you, like the women you trash, keep making the same dumb choices in woman for the same unenlightened reasons and that is why you have had bad experiences. why a are you telling men be jerks because shallow girls do shallow things? There is a battle going on between the sexes and telling men to be assholes is not the way to stop the war or to foster communication -- it is only a call for revenge...and on to my final note
But you made it appear as if you are going to make every girl out there pay because you made an error in judgment. Not all women are playing games if they don't want to give it up to the first guy who is kind--the mature thing to do is move on when you see she isn't interested and don't give of your self until you know the girl likes you back, not become an asshole with an ax to grind with girls. Do some women use men? yes--men use women too! We live and learn--not seek vengeance...
I just has to respond to this part "You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. " So does giving kindnesses automatically mean you get sex? If my guidance counselors listen to me, does this mean I owe him sex? can't you simply do something nice without wanting to get laid--how does this make you a nice guy at all? And if this was the case you were NEVER that girls friend but a liar and manipulator waiting for a shot to get laid.
I was expecting something truthful in this article because I was led here by one that was but it's not. I think the beginning scenario with the guy going after a girl who was ALREADY ATTRACTED to SOMEONE ELSE was a bad start. I mean what if her current boyfriend did exactly what he did just to get her? See sorry to say but when guys think like this it ends in disaster for them. Putting down their confidence, trying "methods" his friend give him. And fail. Once more.
"You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating with physical intimacy."
BULL. SHIT.
Women aren't vending machines. You can't put in nice coins and expect sex to fall out. What the hell is wrong with a woman expecting a nice guy to be a *friend?* Holding you while you cry, letting you vent - those are all things that girls do for their friends. Even guy friends. I'm tired of women being vilified by so-called "nice guys" for expecting the friendship she f***ing signed up for.
when men almost NEVER feel sympathy for the "desperate" or not a model girl. Well guess what you want someone whos hot and confident and cool or whatever(which is why you were atttacted to her in the first place) she wants the same qualities in her own boyfriend. Its your own fault if your going after the hottest girls and getting your heart broken (lol) your being superficial yourself, and then asking the women not to be superficial. The reason why some women complain about their being no nice men is bec
This is a really stupid article, and ill tell you why. These so called "nice guys" are just horny men who want to nave the hottest girlfriend that wohuld take him. They don't consider personality at all theyre just going after looks. Well guess what, if your going to go after a hot girl, who is confident then expect her to want the same thing from a boyfriend, not a puppy following her around all day attending to her "needs". It seems like you expect women to feel sympathy for the desperate guy w
i see what you mean but sometimes that nice guy just really isn't your type, so you should settle for what's around I think not. what happened is the media it affects both genders so to sit here and blame women only is wrong. if people followed the golden rule : treat others the way you want to be treated, we would all be better off
You want to know the number one reason women have cited for not dating me? My teeth being yellow. My teeth were discolored by medication I was forced to take as a toddler for an ear infection, and no amount of over-the-counter whitener will change it, according to multiple dentists. The only solution is veneers, and because of the Hippocratic oath, I have to get braces first, which I needed when I was a teenager, but my parents couldn't afford. It's presumptuous and classist to expect people to have white teeth.
And emailed him, given him cds and guitar pics I got from a favorite artist of both of ours... given him every go signal there is... and no go. Now I've moved on, sort of, though I'd still go out with him if he asked and I know he wants to, hints about it in his emails, but hasn't. And I know it's about confidence, which I've sincerely tried to boost by letting him know what I like about him. But he won't make a solid move. How long does he think I should wait?
How about you communicate clearly that you want him to ask you out? He does not want to risk a good friendship and be seen as a creep, you need to tell him you like him, straight up.
Created an account just to reply to this article.... Wow, excellent insight. I wasn't fully on board with what you were saying at the beginning, but the end is spot on. Ya, I was one of those nice guys. I had a girlfriend that pushed me away, so she could be with an asshole. This taught me to be an asshole. Now I'm an asshole, married with two kids. My wife is miserable and still wants me. My ex-girlfriend is miserable, and wants me back.
Women do not teach men to be anything but assholes.
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Congratulations Lidepi, you just became my new best friend. You fucking nailed it! And because of the bullshit non-sense that women do to us "nice guys", it's all the more reason why I don't talk to women anymore.
Now at days us guys might as well get a 1 night fling, look at porn or cough up a shit load of cash just to afford an escort. If those ladies complain about us guys doing that, I could only say "What are you complaining about? You weren't interested in me in the first place all because I'm not your type nor am I a ladies man/pretty boy, so there's no reason for you to complain".
I could perhaps talk to women, but I'll be damned if I'm going into the friendzone.
You could also travel to East or Southeast Asia where Westerners, particularly white men, experience the 'Charisma Man' effect! The girls right there basically throw themselves at you. This is based on all the books I've read and people I've talked to! And the girls are of faaaaaaaaaaar higher quality than those in the West.
I looooove that post! It's so true! Even though I'm pretty sure I probably did it... But everything that's being said in that article is very true. Thumbs to the person who wrote it! We all needed that wakeup call!
... too bad it came too late!
@mjkinchen61 better late than never
Unfortunately, most woman are attracted to the bad boys! It isn't until you get a bit older and realize what is important .......then you like the attentive guy who will hold your hand.........who is calm, caring, knows how to communicate................
... no sympathy here
Interesting. This is what PUA's say but they say it a little different. They say you guys are basically settling and warning guy's if they don't master the art of getting women etc then this will happen to them.
I don't think I overlook nice guys. In fact, I have a crush on one. But to a degree this article is true for both genders, women tend to do this more to the nice guys. Realistically speaking, there are many times when being nice is not what makes a girl's heart throb for a guy. Honestly speaking, I don't think I do this. I honestly do believe I fall for the nice guys.
When I first start to like someone, I try to figure out his flaws first to see if I can handle it. accept them.
This sounds like where I'm at right now. I'm on the fringe with her. She's my best friend and she recently got cheated on and she tried to work it out(which I applaud her for trying). I've been there for her through thick and thin. Now single, she turns me down because she doesn't see me in the romantic sense. But she loves me. In the platonic sense. Great article and I'm a nice guy that's not gonna become the asshole because of a woman just to get laid.
Fair to an extent--but at the same time, men are just as guilty of this. I was a nice girl who men didn't want to be with, I suppose because I wasn't aggressive enough. I met and married a nice guy and so did a lot fo my friends. As I have said in my previous posts, it is not that women don't want a nice guy, it is that they want a certain type of nice guy just as a ,man wants a certain type of nice girl--besides, are we not to blame for our folly of letting someone abuse our love?
In some ways it is true. But it also goes the other way around. I stopped dating for 2 years after a heart break, finally trusted someone again, that supposedly was a very sweet guy, treated me great, then one day he just stops talking to me. He went back to his ex that cheated on him. It made me realize that men just love b***hes. So basically, when you meet a bi**ch just know that there is some "nice guy" that made her that way.
I dont think he ever healed from it, like when i was cheated on while engaged. Honestly it still follows me in some way, I would not date her again but it change people and it may be so deam hard to accept that change. Took me close to 6 years to accept it as not my fault.
My first boyfriend and love was exactly what you just described: Followed me around like a lost puppy, was there for me when I was emotionally hurting, and always tried to take care of me. Then, after of almost 2 years of dating he dumped me because people told him I was too clingy. Even if you date a nice guy he can still turn into an asshole.
What you should be saying is you won't waste another moment on a girl like that, even for revenge, and you will reserve all the kindness, door opening and flower giving to the girl who loves you, appreciates you and treats you like a king as I do my own "nice" man. Sure--Chad may get all the babes, you may be 35 when it happens, but who cares! Wouldn't you rather have something real than to say you scored with 100 brainless Buffy's? Think about THAT and get off the bitter rants...!
I think you're reading your dislike of the misogynist incel subculture into what he posted.
Besides, don't you think it is entirely possible that you, like the women you trash, keep making the same dumb choices in woman for the same unenlightened reasons and that is why you have had bad experiences. why a are you telling men be jerks because shallow girls do shallow things? There is a battle going on between the sexes and telling men to be assholes is not the way to stop the war or to foster communication -- it is only a call for revenge...and on to my final note
But you made it appear as if you are going to make every girl out there pay because you made an error in judgment. Not all women are playing games if they don't want to give it up to the first guy who is kind--the mature thing to do is move on when you see she isn't interested and don't give of your self until you know the girl likes you back, not become an asshole with an ax to grind with girls. Do some women use men? yes--men use women too! We live and learn--not seek vengeance...
I just has to respond to this part "You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. " So does giving kindnesses automatically mean you get sex? If my guidance counselors listen to me, does this mean I owe him sex? can't you simply do something nice without wanting to get laid--how does this make you a nice guy at all? And if this was the case you were NEVER that girls friend but a liar and manipulator waiting for a shot to get laid.
Exactly.
I was expecting something truthful in this article because I was led here by one that was but it's not. I think the beginning scenario with the guy going after a girl who was ALREADY ATTRACTED to SOMEONE ELSE was a bad start. I mean what if her current boyfriend did exactly what he did just to get her? See sorry to say but when guys think like this it ends in disaster for them. Putting down their confidence, trying "methods" his friend give him. And fail. Once more.
"You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating with physical intimacy."
BULL. SHIT.
Women aren't vending machines. You can't put in nice coins and expect sex to fall out. What the hell is wrong with a woman expecting a nice guy to be a *friend?* Holding you while you cry, letting you vent - those are all things that girls do for their friends. Even guy friends. I'm tired of women being vilified by so-called "nice guys" for expecting the friendship she f***ing signed up for.
Yes!!!
when men almost NEVER feel sympathy for the "desperate" or not a model girl. Well guess what you want someone whos hot and confident and cool or whatever(which is why you were atttacted to her in the first place) she wants the same qualities in her own boyfriend. Its your own fault if your going after the hottest girls and getting your heart broken (lol) your being superficial yourself, and then asking the women not to be superficial. The reason why some women complain about their being no nice men is bec
This is a really stupid article, and ill tell you why. These so called "nice guys" are just horny men who want to nave the hottest girlfriend that wohuld take him. They don't consider personality at all theyre just going after looks. Well guess what, if your going to go after a hot girl, who is confident then expect her to want the same thing from a boyfriend, not a puppy following her around all day attending to her "needs". It seems like you expect women to feel sympathy for the desperate guy w
I don't think you read it. I think you read some article about incels and decided he is one.
i see what you mean but sometimes that nice guy just really isn't your type, so you should settle for what's around I think not. what happened is the media it affects both genders so to sit here and blame women only is wrong. if people followed the golden rule : treat others the way you want to be treated, we would all be better off
You want to know the number one reason women have cited for not dating me? My teeth being yellow. My teeth were discolored by medication I was forced to take as a toddler for an ear infection, and no amount of over-the-counter whitener will change it, according to multiple dentists. The only solution is veneers, and because of the Hippocratic oath, I have to get braces first, which I needed when I was a teenager, but my parents couldn't afford. It's presumptuous and classist to expect people to have white teeth.
And emailed him, given him cds and guitar pics I got from a favorite artist of both of ours... given him every go signal there is... and no go. Now I've moved on, sort of, though I'd still go out with him if he asked and I know he wants to, hints about it in his emails, but hasn't. And I know it's about confidence, which I've sincerely tried to boost by letting him know what I like about him. But he won't make a solid move. How long does he think I should wait?
But how about you make a move instead of dropping hints that he does not act upon?
How about you communicate clearly that you want him to ask you out? He does not want to risk a good friendship and be seen as a creep, you need to tell him you like him, straight up.
Created an account just to reply to this article.... Wow, excellent insight. I wasn't fully on board with what you were saying at the beginning, but the end is spot on. Ya, I was one of those nice guys. I had a girlfriend that pushed me away, so she could be with an asshole. This taught me to be an asshole. Now I'm an asshole, married with two kids. My wife is miserable and still wants me. My ex-girlfriend is miserable, and wants me back.
Women do not teach men to be anything but assholes.