Am I a virgin? should I tell this to the next guy?

i am 31. from india.. my first and only relationship was with a guy at 29. i had sexual relationship with him but we never had intercourse.. we did everything except intercourse.. he forced his fingers inside me and it hurt.. (he was very abusive) so it ended. anyways, he put fingers in my vigina and my butt.. i hated it coz it would hurt.. we also did oral.. my question is am i still a virgin? i feel like a slut.. i only did it coz he was very abusive and i hoped he would marry me since i got involved with him.. should i tell all this to the next guy in future? pls be honest.. thanks.
Updates:
he used to force me into getting physical or i would get beaten.. he had a video of me without clothes and he used to blackmail me..
so am i coming across a slut?

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27

Most Helpful Guy

  • Whoa, first and only relations at age of 29. I mean, my first relations were like at age of 13...

    Anyway, relax. Maybe he did pop your hymen with his fingers, maybe he didn't. Only a doctor can tell at that point. But you're definitely not a slut.

    As for should you tell it to the other guy in a future: I believe in an unwritten rule "don't ask, don't tell". So unless he asks, there's no reason to say it upfront.

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    • he didn't my hymen is still there and it doesn't break.. he tried but it didn't.. i just got tested for rape i was told my hymen still there

Most Helpful Girl

  • Your still a virgin and no your not a slut. Well since you should be honest to the one you love I advise you tell this to your other partner if he can't accept it he's not the one for and second did you report that stupid ass who hurt you he doesn't have the right and that is consider as molesting and he could be charge you don't know who else is in danger report him.

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    • ya i put a case on him..

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    • it is a lesson learned

    • I can't force you to it's your mind but just remember the time you taking to place revenge on him he's moving on with his necessary life maybe forgot that you exist that's just life when you think you have it bad you don't people are worst than you it have 5 year old being brutally raped everyday you didn't get rape he just touched you luckily

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What Guys Said 6

  • I would say this is not the best forum to ask the question, since it depends so much on culture how much virgin or not matters.

    Personally I dont see why you would have to tell anyone about this, unless you feel need to get it off your chest. Most partners don't want to talk about exes anyway...

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  • Yes, you are still a virgin. Don't worry about it. I know how sensitive this issue is for you, dince i am an i dian myself. Don't worry, don't care about others so much. Just remember, don't trust anyone easily. Test them before going ahead with the relationship next time. That would help you.
    Also, you're not at all a slut due to the described act. If anything, the guy is a prick. I'm glad you left him.

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  • everytime i see a post from people from india... i kind of like the country less. i think it´s best to wait untill you´re about to tet sexual. some guys might go crazy over a virign xD

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    • india is the worst country for women.. never go there !! when they say india is spiritual.. i dont see a bigger joke and lie than that !! and i am indian..

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    • lol are you kidding me? ^^ one of the most overpopulated and polluted countries ever? no thanks. but i guess better than india for sure :P

    • india and china cruel in different ways

  • If the other guy asks then don't lie but I don't think you should tell him all that out of context

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    • wht u mean?

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    • And you are not a slut!!!

    • If he loves you he will and if he doesn't respect you, he's not the right guy for you. I think he will though

  • It's not really sex if he only fingered you

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  • was that to get past

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What Girls Said 1

  • write to me privately if you wish discuss these delicate issues.

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