Why do I only attract CREEPY attention from guys?

I am a confident, independent, self-respecting woman. I'm told often that I'm very attractive, but I dress and act modestly. But it seems like guys only ever want friendship or sex with me. Never just a normal, pure romantic relationship. It doesn't even matter how nice or pure-hearted the guy seems.

For example, I have feelings for one of my guy friends, who is one of the genuinely nicest and most respectful people I've ever known. We recently started flirting, and I was surprised that a nice guy was showing romantic interest in for once. Then he made a creepy sexual comment that completely surprised me coming from him.

And in general, the majority of attention I receive from guys is creepy comments from strangers. What is wrong?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • There are a lot of creeps out there who will approach as many women as they can because since they really don't care about the woman, or how many women reject them.

    As for your friend, I'm curious as too what exactly sounded so creepy that you are completely turned off from him?

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What Guys Said 7

  • You sound a bit squeamish honestly. You have a very dated/antiquated view on what a chivalrous man looks like. Sex is part of romance, and flirting isn't flirting if you aren't making your intent known. If he doesn't make it clear that he wants you, he runs the risk of getting friendzoned. Honestly, any time a girl uses the word creepy, i kind of take it with a grain of salt. Often, creepy just means that the girl found the guy approaching them unattractive. That isn't creepy.

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    • I get the sense that the people answering this question don't understand what I mean by creepy. It is possible to show attraction and sexual desire without being creepy. When I say creepy I mean disgusting and disrespectful comments/actions accompanied by a complete unwillingness to treat me as a friend or even a valuable human.

  • It's possible you've been unlucky.

    It's true that guys who flirt awkwardly are more likely to be single hence you run into them more.

    It's true that guys only looking for sex hit on more women so you would run into them more.

    But I also suspect you're ideas of 'pure romantic' versus 'creepy' are atypical.

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  • So for you it is forbidden to dare to make sexual comments and compliments to you? Have you ever wondered if it is yourself who's wrong?

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    • I get the sense that the people answering this question don't understand what I mean by creepy. It is possible to show attraction and sexual desire without being creepy. When I say creepy I mean disgusting and disrespectful comments/actions accompanied by a complete unwillingness to treat me as a friend or even a valuable human. That doesn't make me a prude, that means I appreciate respect, which is a perfectly valid thing to want, not "wrong."

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    • He seemed like a nice guy from a distance, but it's possible I'm wrong because admittedly I don't know him very well

    • if you don't know him so well then its ok. I guess you're right.

  • You think that because one guy was a creep to you, the rest will be. It's not us, it's your thinking

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    • He's definitely not the only guy who's been creepy to me and it's definitely not just in my head

  • You are the problem. Stop labeling every guy as a creep, because they aren't. You're an over-sensitive prude who clearly has a feminist, anti-male streak that expects every guy to be a simpering mule of a man and not dare have sexual desire of any kind.

    Romance is dead, because guys get labeled as losers or worse by *women* when they actually try it, so guys do what works, and you know what? Being called creeps and rapists is just another day for a guy now, so we no longer care about how you feel, we'll pump and dump and then leave, because you women are too much of a cancer to deal with otherwise.

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    • I get the sense that the people answering this question don't understand what I mean by creepy. It is possible to show attraction and sexual desire without being creepy. When I say creepy I mean disgusting and disrespectful comments/actions accompanied by a complete unwillingness to treat me as a friend or even a valuable human. That doesn't make me a prude, that means I appreciate respect, which is a perfectly valid thing to want.

  • Because the genuinely nice guys think they're just your friend.

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    • I show interest in them, though, and sometimes even tell them I like them. Then I get friendzoned.

    • This happens to guys all the time. Just move on and keep looking.

  • Why do women overuse the word "creepy" so much?

    Why are men shamed by women for their sexuality?

    Why are women so opposed to "slut shaming" but have no problem at all with "creep shaming" and "pervert shaming"?

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    • I'm not opposed to slut shaming, and I don't say "creepy" unless I really mean it. I think it's fair to call it creepy for a guy to be making sexual comments when we're not in a relationship and, hell, he hasn't even told me he likes me. He can be sexually attracted to me, but can't he keep the comments to himself if he's not even willing to tell me he likes me or give me other types of compliments?

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    • I get the sense that the people answering this question don't understand what I mean by creepy. It is possible to show attraction and sexual desire without being creepy. When I say creepy I mean disgusting and disrespectful comments/actions accompanied by a complete unwillingness to treat me as a friend or even a valuable human. That doesn't make me a prude, that means I appreciate respect, which is a perfectly valid thing to want.

    • Everything you said is relative. Perhaps you can give some details about what he said and did that was so horribly disgusting and disrespectful.

What Girls Said 2

  • Maybe the creepy sexual comment was kind of a joke, maybe he tried compliment you in a funny way, ya kno?

    And also only creepy strangers comment, and the nice non pedo dudes would find it weird to comment on strangers

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  • Uggg! Me too! If one more creep whistles and the like at me... I just might scream!

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