Ex-Teacher Now Lover? Does he like me? Should I like him?

I taught for about five years, I graduated early. I was married while teaching, after I got out of teaching, I got a divorce, found a new guy and started a new relationship. I soon found I felt trapped, or smothered and wanted to take a break from my current relationship. I told my boyfriend this and he was crushed, but agreed to take a break and let me do my own thing for awhile. He really cares about me.

As soon as this break happened, I got a random message from a past student. This is not uncommon, and I often get requests to write letters of recommendation for past students and things like that. So, I happily replied. This person was now 20 and in college. I was 28. After a few messages, he asked to take me out... since I was newly single, and this was a really fucking hot idea (let me explain, this was all completely legal and I never considered this connection until the message), I decided to take a chance and just go with it.

What followed was a really hot and short fling, but I really did like the guy. He made me laugh, was super sensitive, and I loved the way he touched my skin, and looked at me. I still can see the look.

I decided after about one month of this bliss to take a reality pill and move on. I didn't want to take such a huge risk on such a young guy. He reacted like a scorned 20 year old and was upset. But, eventually, got the hint and I thought he moved on.

This was a year ago. I went back to my old boyfriend. For the past ten months he has messaged or text me every week. Asking to see me, hang out with me, or just talk.

I finally said yes. I can't get this guy out of my head, so I finally agreed.

He came over- remember I haven't seen this guy in about a year. Immediately there was a connection. We're very attracted to each other. We started to have sex, then he stopped, then kissed me on the forehead. He acted like he wanted to, but stopped.

Does he like me? Why did he stop? Is it just about sex? Is it just a really hot idea?

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What Guys Said 1

  • Given that you turned him down, and "moved on" earlier, why are you surprised that he is a little defensive? I would make amends if you *really* want a relationship with him.

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    • Yes, that's true.

      Would you think that his pursuit of me is about me or the fact I'm his past teacher?

    • It may be both. Sure, some young men have "teacher" fantasies, or he may appreciate your brains compared to other women he meets, or you may just be a hottie!!! But if he is great for you, does it matter?

    • I think it's all those things... which makes it really hard to ignore. It's like the most enticing idea ever. I don't know if I can separate those excitement feelings from practical ones, it just seems so impractical.

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