Being used for sex?

I told this man that I don't know if I can continue our casual sexual relationship. I feel morally wrong about it and I have feelings for him. He responded that he had feelings too, he's just better at checking them and he doesn't like to talk about it. He also said I'm his best friend and he doesn't want to push me away. I am very hurt. Am I being used and strung along?
  • Yep, you're being used.
    Vote A
  • He cares for you more than just friends.
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Guy

  • If he is not willing to talk about the feelings and tries to squelch them whenever you bring them up, you're a fuck-buddy or booty call or friends with benefits only to him. I'd give him one chance to be honest-- force him to be brutally honest-- you have what he wants, so you can pull the strings. If he wants nothing but a sexual relationship and you want mote, then you owe it to yourself to move on and find someone who WILL give you the kind of relationship you're actually looking for.

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What Guys Said 6

  • Yup he is using you for sex... and in reality if he is then he is not really your friend too...

    And i think you should distance yourself from him right away... if you don't you will only hurt yourself more...

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    • Thanks for the advice. I know deep down you're right. I just wish I hadn't fallen for him. Should I just cut all ties with no explanation or tell him that I'm getting better at "checking my feelings... Bye."

    • Show All
    • What ever suit right for you...

  • I think strung along rather than used. It looks like you are fallen for him and he has a friends with benefits . Very simple test say to him if you want me as a friend, we stay friends but no more physical stuff. How he reacts will be very helpful to you in deciding next move for yourself.

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  • As hard as it is to hear or accept , it does sound as if he is in fact using you for his own satisfaction. If there are indeed feelings on his part , there would be little to prevent things from being taken to the next level ; unless you have given him reason to feel otherwise

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  • No you're not being used it's an arrangement you were obviously willing to accept and now you just don't feel comfortable continuing so tell him you're uncomfortable with how things are and you can either be his girlfriend or his friend but not his friend with benefits.

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  • Obviously you decided to partake in the 'casual arrangement', and now you are claiming you have moral objections

    It seems you are messing around with the guy

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  • Oh stop making yourself a victim. If you're enjoying the sex then you're not being "used." It's a mutual thing.

    You should worry more on how you feel about having casual sex more than you should worry about what his intentions are.

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What Girls Said 5

  • There is no "used" in a casual/FwB relationship. You signed up for the same thing, but now you're breaking the rules by caring too much. Biggest pitfall in these arrangements.

    If you can't do casual, you need to break it off. Sadly you will only get hurt and he most likely will never change.

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  • If you want more, then don't have any more sex until you are in a good relationship and being treated right. never settle. it doesn't matter if he claims to care for you or not, if he's not doing what you would like. either become his girlfriend or stop fucking with him completely..

    you get used when you are getting less than what you want. when a situation is no longer beneficial and causing you emotional pain, then change the terms of the relationship or cut him off completely. he shouldn't get to use your body for sexual relief if your emotional needs aren't being met.

    if he had feelings for you, now that he knows you feel the same why doesn't he want to take it to the next level? because he's happy string you along and using you for sex, that's why.

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    • Very, very well said. Should I cut all ties without an explanation?

  • If he cared about you he wouldn't have a problem talking about his feelings, you can't force someone to care though. So, the way I see it you guys are friends with benefits. :/

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  • No, you're not . He made his intentions clear from the get go. It's up to you if you're a giver in this or not.

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  • You got yourself a christian grey

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