Doesn't apply so much to me at least, though I don't like the use of the language of "pursuing" in that text. Calling someone you're actively dating isn't "pursuing" in my opinion, that's just chatting. I also don't prioritize a girl until the interest seems mutual. It's not like I fall in love with a girl I've only dated a few times.Now for actual "pursuing", like asking a girl out, then the quote applies more to me (though I don't think it applies to shy guys). If I'm interested in a girl, then I will ask her out. For a girl to ask me out would be kind of backwards since I'm confident enough to ask a girl I'm interested in out very quickly without twiddling my thumbs and waiting for a perfect opportunity or hoping she asks me out instead. That said, she's hardly my top priority at that point; she's just a date.
I happily accept the responsibility of the pursuer taking all the initiative in the beginning. I'm somewhat old-fashioned in the sense of believing I should be the one asking the girl out, not the other way around, as well as deciding where we go and when, and still paying for it (since it's all my idea and she's my "guest").However, the girl is far from a priority at that point. When I ask a girl out, my level of interest in her is not so high, just like, "She's pretty, she seems nice". Maybe we've been friends or acquaintances for a while but it's not like I've developed a crush on her. And if she's just going to sit back after the dates like the analogical star fish of dating and not give me any sign of mutual interest like calling me or texting me or talking about a future, then typically I'm not fond enough of her at that point to keep going. I can just ask another girl out who shows a bit more mutual interest.
Like any girl who keeps me guessing about whether she likes me back or not (I've already made it obvious by asking her out) and starts to make me feel like I'm being lead around is one I tend to drop very quickly and just move on to the next girl, since we haven't been together long enough and haven't shared enough experiences together for me to care that much.
If he's chasing you it means you're creating a distance that he has to chase to get there , I think both sides should be mature and just know each other without what's called " chase " yes he should make the first move but I wouldn't call that "chase "
Yes and no. If a man doesn't make any effort, they're clearly not interested, but same goes to women. Why would men have to waste time on pursuing women who don't show any interest or initiative. When both parties are interested, it's not a pursuit at all, because both make the effort.
Have an opinion?
This can only be applied to an existing relationship (and applies to both men and women).This doesn't apply to introduction and first contact... or first move if you will.
It isn't biology. It is a social construct. And it certainly is not universal.
And I will also say, it works beautifully in the other direction.When I was young, I asked women out. Quite often they had medium amounts of attraction, lets say somewhere around 5 or 6 on the attraction scale. Very lukewarm. This created the need to pursue, hoping her attraction would increase. It was a stupid game of waffling interest levels, and obviously it never worked out. When a woman pursues me, it tells me right off the bat her interest level is high. There is no need to work at it. I know where I stand. I know I can trust her. All I have to worry about is being present and showing her a good time. It is easy. Effortless. Why would I ever want to work hard at trying to increase attraction levels ever again?
I know I know English teacher's text always said randomly in English class. They are just focus on grammar and new words.
It's true in my opinion that a man should search for and pursue his woman, but a woman needs to make it possible, to get visible and to be still single :P
This is true, IF and ONLY IF the woman does not play the "hard to get" bullshit head game. Not pursuing him is not the same thing as forcing him to keep pursuing and "proving himself".
I can only speak from experience, and in my case it’s true. Although I wouldn’t know about the super shy ones, but even kinda shy ones put some effort in to let you know.
Yeah, not gonna argue.. That whole argument is plain stupid. If you are interested in someone, you try. No matter what type of apache helicopter you are.
That has nothing to do with gender. If you care for someone, you make an effort for them. If you can't be bothered to go out of your way for them, you don't care much for them.
I'm sure shy men exist too. Or men with low self esteem
Yeah. This book is outdated. Perhaps sexist.
Not at all. If we're interested in you, we would also sort of stall.
uh... no.it's a two way street, if she expects me to do literally everything then that's a clear sign she really isn't interested in me.
No as a guy I'd rather the Girl make the first moves that way I know what they want.
I will argue with you and now Im gonna follow you
There's some truth in it
No. Shy men do in fact exist.
when you assume it makes an ass out of you and me
Yes more or less
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