The ones hardest to love are the ones who need it the most. “Treating a damaged girl like shit because that’s all she’s known and she won’t have it any other way is only going to give her one perspective about love.
Well i did think out the question. Not all guys are like that. I crave hugs and affection and i like to cuddle but I'm still a man's man. But i want to feel like its ok to comfort someone without thinking I'm doing something wrong by social standards. I'm sure there are people who have expectations that it might get them something but that's not me and I'm sure there are other guys who feel this way.
Wanting hugs from girls right now versus when you are crying is completely different! You can physically comfort girls. But the hard truth is, I wouldn't recommend it, unless you are already very good friends or a couple. If a guy hugs me for longer than a second while I'm sad or cry, I would push him away, suddenly hide my emotions or run away. I've never cried in front of guys. The advice doesn't only apply to guys, but I would also suggest a girl to not physically comfort a guy, because he would probably be overwhelmed and run away aswell. There is no special reason, except what we are used to. Either gender is gonna find it strange and wouldn't want to cry in front of the other. Don't lie and say you wouldn't find it strange, unless you are already very close friends with that person. However, it could be a bit different in your country. I probably live in a completely different country than you.
You don't know me. I choose to live my life open to the possibility of love with anyone. If you don't want to be open to people then you are not what I'm looking for, so I guess it all shakes out in the end. I want to be allowed to be open about my feeling, I don't care who it offends because without it I'm already dead.
Of course, I don't know you. You didn't read what I said with an open mind, but twisted words around to fit your thinking. I'm the most open person you'll find in this comment section, I always talk about my feelings and I broke up with my boyfriend, because he never talked about his feelings which upset me. I specifically stated that hugging between couples and friends is normal, but not between a girl and guy that aren't already close! Do you not understand English? Did I talk about love? I never even mentioned love! I talk about manners and social norms. Go hug a girl that is sad in class or work and see what happens. She is likely gonna push you away. Normal behavior. Don't complain when 99% of guys would do the same.
It's all either love or hate and it speaks for itself.
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@ My favorite way to test if I'm being a genuine sypathetic fellow or a horny dog is to replace the girl with an old man and if I'd still do the same thing regardless then I'm not just thinking with my penis.I do that too well with a few obvious adjustments 🙃
@VIVANT Didn't think girls had the same issue...
So true. There are no categories anymore. A man emotionally abuses because he thinks it makes him manly. After 21 years of it, its weak and pathetic. He is a small sad excuse for a man. A man that is comforting and reassuring is manly. I think the sexualized nature takes away from respect for women, not the bla bla we hear today, but what women are supposed to be. They are comforters. They nurture. They care for. Patience. There is beauty in the softness of a woman. But this time period has women looked at as play things. Tools for pleasure. And hey, dont get me wrong, we are, but that's 1 aspect of us. Men are tools of pleasure for us too. But that's just one side of a man. Feminists have taken true men away from us. And have blurred the lines on what is feminine and masculine. And the purpose for all of it. Sorry that was a rant
@WarningWarning The ranting is good. We all have been victims of todays culture. You articulated it very well.
Well I am cajun, so thank you my friend. But I am also old. So I better!
It easier to think you'll have the right words to say than to actually say them in the moment. I do my best but interpretation always gets the best of people.
If you are not good with words, you can offer listening. Some women appreciate that more than words.
I'm good at that. I interpret things wrong to sometimes, but with words left unsaid. It's hard to know what each other are really feeling.
You may be right. I'm hesitant to become to confident because it can easily cross the line into narcissistic behavior. I don't like the way it feels.
I do all the time but I've never really had a long term relationship.
Exactly They use it to play with our emotions
Other guys use affection to control women, that's awful how?
Because it badly impacts us Yes, there’s somebody else out there besides you Shocking I know
Jeeze that was a bit rude, i didn't mean to sound narrow minded i just don't understand that, it impacts me greatly too, I can relate to that.
Ok Well I’m sorry I received your comment wrong
Lol it's ok i am a dick most of the time so i deserve it, just not for that one.
Why not, you don't think people do?