Guy's Behavior
1 mo

Should I get over this?

Anonymous
So it happened a while ago but I still can’t seem to get over it. The memory is blurry nowdays because of all the overthinking that I put into it, but I’ll tell you the bits that I remember. There was no fight. I remember no argument or falling out whatsoever. My boyfriend and I were just in my living room and I remember him standing up in front of one of the couches doing something. I circled one of the tables and remember seeing his back. I can’t remember clearly what was it that I did that triggered a response. All this time I’ve remembered I spooked him from behind but again, I’ve overthought this so much I feel the memory has changed. Next thing I clearly remember I was facing him sitting on the couch where he was previously looking at unaware with his hand/fist up in the air. I remember his face with a shocked expression almost confined. It took him a couple of seconds and he put down his fist. We had a conversation afterwards and he told me that he never would’ve actually hit me, that it was a reflex or something. Again, this happened a long time ago so I’m telling the bits I remember did happen. He even cried a bit during our conversation telling me that his dad used to hurt his mom and that he didn’t want me to see him that way. I don’t know if to believe this was an accident. It sure sounds like a fight/flight response but I just can’t get out of my head “he raised his fist at you.” It torments me and I really need advice. He’s never been violent towards me nor abusive. He is a caring and loving guy, always there for me and tells me he would never hurt me intentionally, and never has. He keeps his word so thats why I think he’s actually telling the truth. My therapist tells me not to worry about that memory and to let it go. But I can’t. Its the fact that he raised his fist. I totally ignore the context and just see it as if he wanted to hurt me or swing. Should I move on from this? Does it sound bad? Or does it just sound like an honest mistake?
Should I get over this?
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