Why do guys make plans but not follow through with them?

Question

like if my guy friend is dropping me off home he'll say something like "let's go to the city sometime, okay?" or he'll text "let's meet this weekend"... but then when it comes time to doing said thing they make an excuse or say their busy. so why bring up such plans in the first place? I don't get it... maybe you guys can help me understand?

does it mean he's nervous or something?

Answer 1

PurSeduction

Xper 5

That is a very wide spreaded general human behavior...

It always feels good to speak out things you would like to do without acctually having to put them into action directly. Just by creating sth in your mind, speaking it out to someone, creating some sort of pre excitement but in the end don't hold up / put it to action... Creates false hope and disappointment long term...

Do what u say, say what u do.

Try to find the reason why and get rid of people just talking but hardly ever meet up to their plans.

Asker

1 mo
he usually always agrees to meet if I initiate though. but then he randomly does this and that's why i'm confused. I used to think this guy liked me but because of him not going through with plans sometimes it's confusing me if he's even interested in me or sees me as just a friend.

Answer 2

Asker

he usually always agrees to meet if I initiate though. but then he randomly does this and that's why i'm confused. I used to think this guy liked me but because of him not going through with plans sometimes it's confusing me if he's even interested in me or sees me as just a friend.

Answer 3

Tyrael | 115 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Explorer

Don't take it personally, it's a product of our times and it's definitely not a guy-only problem. Girls are just as bad for it. There's so many distractions and methods of communication that people are always looking out for something else at all times. They might discuss making plans because it feels good to do that, but that means very little, because people have gotten lazy and entertainment is so readily available. Why go out when you just remembered your favourite show is on? Or maybe that friend who wasn't available is suddenly free now? And so on.

Asker

1 mo
I def see your point. I want to ask this though, if a guy does this with a girl then it probably means he doesn't like her more than a friend, right? bc I thought he had feelings for me but then this kind of behavior makes me think otherwise. and he doesn't do this all the time, but the fact he does it sometimes confuses me
Tyrael

1 mo
It's hard to say. You never know what's going in people's heads. It could be as simple as he's got other things going on and just didn't feel up to going out that time but didn't have the heart to just be honest and say that. Not a lot of people do because another product of our time is that people do not like being told "No". There's always an explanation required, or guilt being placed upon them. So people find stupid excuses and the cycle continues.

Me personally, I would do my very best not to cancel plans with a girl I liked because I'd hate to ruin my chances with her. That's just me though.
Asker

1 mo
I see I see. thank you! this guy earlier in the week texted me and made vague plans but he simply said "hey I got an interview, i'll tell you about it on the weekend". so I was waiting for him to text me later in the week or on the weekend about meeting, but he never did. usually if he says a specific time, he follows through. that's why I was a bit bummed. but anyways, thanks for your answer!

Answer 4

Asker

I def see your point. I want to ask this though, if a guy does this with a girl then it probably means he doesn't like her more than a friend, right? bc I thought he had feelings for me but then this kind of behavior makes me think otherwise. and he doesn't do this all the time, but the fact he does it sometimes confuses me

Answer 5

Tyrael

It's hard to say. You never know what's going in people's heads. It could be as simple as he's got other things going on and just didn't feel up to going out that time but didn't have the heart to just be honest and say that. Not a lot of people do because another product of our time is that people do not like being told "No". There's always an explanation required, or guilt being placed upon them. So people find stupid excuses and the cycle continues.

Me personally, I would do my very best not to cancel plans with a girl I liked because I'd hate to ruin my chances with her. That's just me though.

Answer 6

Asker

I see I see. thank you! this guy earlier in the week texted me and made vague plans but he simply said "hey I got an interview, i'll tell you about it on the weekend". so I was waiting for him to text me later in the week or on the weekend about meeting, but he never did. usually if he says a specific time, he follows through. that's why I was a bit bummed. but anyways, thanks for your answer!

Answer 7

jett16

Xper 5

Honestly i get the same problem with my friends and i hate it

Asker

1 mo
so i'm guessing if a guy does that then he doesn't have interest in the girl? I thought my guy friend liked me but maybe not if he's like this?
jett16

1 mo
No its more like "looking for something better" kinda or its just to find things to do
Asker

1 mo
wait I don't understand. looking for something better? can you explain lol (sorry i'm stupid, I don't know why i'm not understanding)
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jett16

1 mo
No problem not looking for a better date just looking for something else to excite them or let put it like this he makes a plan with u to go to a date but one of his friends say hey wanna come drink
Asker

1 mo
gotchaa I see. ugh well that sucks. anyways, thanks for your answer and explanation!
jett16

1 mo
No problem

Answer 8

Asker

so i'm guessing if a guy does that then he doesn't have interest in the girl? I thought my guy friend liked me but maybe not if he's like this?

Answer 9

jett16

No its more like "looking for something better" kinda or its just to find things to do

Answer 10

Asker

wait I don't understand. looking for something better? can you explain lol (sorry i'm stupid, I don't know why i'm not understanding)

Answer 11

jett16

No problem not looking for a better date just looking for something else to excite them or let put it like this he makes a plan with u to go to a date but one of his friends say hey wanna come drink

Answer 12

Asker

gotchaa I see. ugh well that sucks. anyways, thanks for your answer and explanation!

Answer 13

jett16

No problem

Why do guys make plans but not follow through with them?

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