Why does he still keep me on social media?

Question

This guy friend wanted to sleep with me with no steings attached. I was fine with it at first, but later on I told him I wanted more. He rejected me but continued to talk as friends but I noticed he started to pull away. I felt as if he was giving me reasons to make me walk away from him. Like, he didn't talk much when we talked on the phone or would watch videos during. Some days he didn't even call me at all (before, he would call me every day). This lasted for some weeks until he got busy with his little nephews and calls went off the table because he was always around with people and he didn't want them to listen. He would just text me. His texts started to become short (a quick hi and how you doing and bye).
I didn't like this situation anymore, so one day when he texted me, I left him on read. He texted me again 3 days later, and asked why I didn't talk to him and I coldly replied "I was busy". He asked if I had started a job and when I said no, he just said okay and hasn't texted me since. It's been 6 days since last time.

I felt as if he did all of this to gradually get distant and finally stop talking. If he doesn't want to talk, then why still keep me there? Are there any chances we might start talking again?

Answer 1

SueShe | 674 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Master

He obviously just wanted you for the sex and that's it.

The fact that you rejected him was like a cold shower to his ego. But rather than to accept it as a fact, he is playing with your emotions by giving you the the psychological treatment. It seems to work since you are obviously insecure about his behavior.

He is slowly pulling away because he could not achieve his goal but he is keeping you as a backup, just in case you start developing feelings for him or want to get intimate. This is a subtle psychological approach.

You start doubting about yourself and he is patient. Yes, there are chances that you might talk again but he will let you do the first move and make sure to wait a few days to answer you, just enough time to keep you hooked.

React

Asker

1 y
I will NOT make the first move. If he doesn't do it, I'll just block him. I don't know how long shpuld I wait though.
Asker

1 y
Should*
SueShe

1 y
If you wait 48 hours and still nothing happens, then you must conclude that you are out of the picture and that he just wanted you for his physical pleasure.

There is no need to run after people like that because they are those that like to hit and run after they obtained what they wanted.
Show All Show Less
Asker

1 y
It's beem 7 days since the last time we talked.
Asker

1 y
If I'm out of his picture, why doesn't he block me or remove me? It bums me...
SueShe

1 y
Just let him go. Social media is not important and it should not cause you to overthink the situation because of that.
Asker

1 y
No its not important but it is the only means of communication I have with him.

Answer 2

Asker

I will NOT make the first move. If he doesn't do it, I'll just block him. I don't know how long shpuld I wait though.

Answer 3

Asker

Should*

Answer 4

SueShe

If you wait 48 hours and still nothing happens, then you must conclude that you are out of the picture and that he just wanted you for his physical pleasure.

There is no need to run after people like that because they are those that like to hit and run after they obtained what they wanted.

Answer 5

Asker

It's beem 7 days since the last time we talked.

Answer 6

Asker

If I'm out of his picture, why doesn't he block me or remove me? It bums me...

Answer 7

SueShe

Just let him go. Social media is not important and it should not cause you to overthink the situation because of that.

Answer 8

Asker

No its not important but it is the only means of communication I have with him.

Answer 9

spartan55 | 22.1K opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Master

You told him you wanted no strings sex and then you completely changed by "wanting more". Why did you do no strings to begin with anyway? He is backing off because he doesn't want to get serious (unlike you). I'm not sure how you don't understand this.

React

1 Person

Asker

1 y
I did no strings first because I was fine with it until things changed for me.
However, I do realise why this back off is happening. I just don't know if he has actually thought of ending things with me. That's why I asked why am I still on his social media.
spartan55

1 y
Don't make the mistake of overvaluing social media. It just doesn't matter much. Would you do no strings in the future after this?
Asker

1 y
I'm not sure. I mean I don't really want the no strings but I still want to talk with him. Even if sex never happened.
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spartan55

1 y
Yeah, that probably isn't going to happen.
spartan55

1 y
It was about sex... the end.

Answer 10

Asker

I did no strings first because I was fine with it until things changed for me.
However, I do realise why this back off is happening. I just don't know if he has actually thought of ending things with me. That's why I asked why am I still on his social media.

Answer 11

spartan55

Don't make the mistake of overvaluing social media. It just doesn't matter much. Would you do no strings in the future after this?

Answer 12

Asker

I'm not sure. I mean I don't really want the no strings but I still want to talk with him. Even if sex never happened.

Answer 13

spartan55

Yeah, that probably isn't going to happen.

Answer 14

spartan55

It was about sex... the end.

Answer 15

Avicenna | 6.8K opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Master

It's probably laziness on his part. Maybe he wants to keep the possibility of having sex with you again.

React

Asker

1 y
Is there anything I can do now?

Answer 16

Asker

Is there anything I can do now?

Answer 17

Iron_Man | 10.7K opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Master

The act of having sex in the future

React

Asker

1 y
Is there anything I can do now?
Iron_Man

1 y
Why would you wanna get involved with somebody like that to use you for sex
Asker

1 y
Good question.
Show All Show Less
Iron_Man

1 y
Yes for sure
Asker

1 y
So really what should I do?
Iron_Man

1 y
Well you have to tell me what do you want to do? Have a friends with benefits sexual relationship anything goes no strings attached or just wrap it up and move on in your life
Asker

1 y
I don't want sex with no strings attached. But I don't want to move on from him either.
Iron_Man

1 y
Well unfortunately that’s all he’s interested in and I don’t recommend that lifestyle for you or anybody else for that matter. What about if you we’re just friends no Sex involved
Asker

1 y
I don't know but I don't think he'd be interested without the sex. Else, why would he pull away?
Iron_Man

1 y
It’s very simple the hand writing is on the wall he wants sex take it or leave it kind of a deal you should leave it
Asker

1 y
I should leave it. I see. Thanks.
Iron_Man

1 y
You’re very welcome my friend I wish you the best of luck
Asker

1 y
Thanks. Same to you.
And just out of curiosity, why wouldn't you recommend that kind of lifestyle?
Iron_Man

1 y
Because that’s not Christian like thats not good moral values
Asker

1 y
I see. :)
Iron_Man

1 y
Nothing ever good comes out of a friends with benefits Plus if you sleep around with others you can catch a disease
Asker

1 y
You are right. I've been simply obsessed with sex. And since I don't have a boyfriend, I chose this way.
Iron_Man

1 y
I have a high sex drive myself. But what are you willing to choose?
Asker

1 y
The shortest way.
Iron_Man

1 y
What do you mean
Asker

1 y
It's the shortest way to fulfill my sexual needs.
Iron_Man

1 y
You don’t wanna do that by having sex with a man that uses you. If you are so frustrated take waterfall pleasures in the bathtub. Do you know what I’m talking about?
Asker

1 y
No. 🤷‍♀️
Iron_Man

1 y
Private message me

Answer 18

Asker

Is there anything I can do now?

Answer 19

Iron_Man

Why would you wanna get involved with somebody like that to use you for sex

Answer 20

Asker

Good question.

Answer 21

Iron_Man

Yes for sure

Answer 22

Asker

So really what should I do?

Answer 23

Iron_Man

Well you have to tell me what do you want to do? Have a friends with benefits sexual relationship anything goes no strings attached or just wrap it up and move on in your life

Answer 24

Asker

I don't want sex with no strings attached. But I don't want to move on from him either.

Answer 25

Iron_Man

Well unfortunately that’s all he’s interested in and I don’t recommend that lifestyle for you or anybody else for that matter. What about if you we’re just friends no Sex involved

Answer 26

Asker

I don't know but I don't think he'd be interested without the sex. Else, why would he pull away?

Answer 27

Iron_Man

It’s very simple the hand writing is on the wall he wants sex take it or leave it kind of a deal you should leave it

Answer 28

Asker

I should leave it. I see. Thanks.

Answer 29

Iron_Man

You’re very welcome my friend I wish you the best of luck

Answer 30

Asker

Thanks. Same to you.
And just out of curiosity, why wouldn't you recommend that kind of lifestyle?

Answer 31

Iron_Man

Because that’s not Christian like thats not good moral values

Answer 32

Asker

I see. :)

Answer 33

Iron_Man

Nothing ever good comes out of a friends with benefits Plus if you sleep around with others you can catch a disease

Answer 34

Asker

You are right. I've been simply obsessed with sex. And since I don't have a boyfriend, I chose this way.

Answer 35

Iron_Man

I have a high sex drive myself. But what are you willing to choose?

Answer 36

Asker

The shortest way.

Answer 37

Iron_Man

What do you mean

Answer 38

Asker

It's the shortest way to fulfill my sexual needs.

Answer 39

Iron_Man

You don’t wanna do that by having sex with a man that uses you. If you are so frustrated take waterfall pleasures in the bathtub. Do you know what I’m talking about?

Answer 40

Asker

No. 🤷‍♀️

Answer 41

Iron_Man

Private message me

Why does he still keep me on social media?

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