Are we just friends or is she interested?

Signs that makes me think were more then friends:

She will glance over at me and hold the gaze and when I turn she will either keep the stare with a smile or look away quick and down with a smile. Laughs at every joke or nything I say that's funny. She will touch my arm or touched my leg when I was cold started to rub it to make me warm (I know that sounded very girly but to me its the Antarctic in my class). She will always say my name to get my attention when she comes into class (college). She always gets there after me and sits next to me. We flirt a lot. Poking back and forth with one another. She gave me her number with out me asking. Asked to do stuff. She introduced me to her friends. Good body language and always interested in what I have to say.,

Now the things that throw me off are as follows:

When I asked her to hangout she would say yea and then the day would come and either she was busy wit work or something else. The first time I invited her out I actually had to cancel on her that night due to some friend issues. The third time we got out of class early I asked her and her friend if they wanted to grab food and she said she couldn't cause her friend had to go to work in an hour, (but we got out early like 30 min. She now has started to ask about my friend who is 3 years older then us. Asked me to ask him about her.

i tried moving on. And I did until last class where she asked out of the blue y I dn't invite her out nymore, I responded cause you always cancel on me "flaky", she laughed and said that she was busy those times I asked (BS in my opinion)

I don't understand this girl, I ahve been in relationships b4 and I've always been able to tell if a girl was interested. This girl is showing all the signs that she is into me, but then she contradicts those signs with actions like not hanging out and now askin about my friend. Someone explain to me what is happening and what I should do.


Most Helpful Girl

  • All I'm going to say is that sometimes actions don't speak louder than words. She really could possibly like you and that's the worst part that's you can't know for sure. I know that for me, I sometimes look at flirting like an art. Its terrible but I like to see guys fall for me because its so hopelessly easy. I know I hardly admit this because its awful and I'm the type of girl guys hate, even though they don't even know I'm doing it. I actually recall touching guys legs and arms like that just because that's me and I know they go crazyyy about it. The guys I do it to though I'm usually interested in, but sometimes its just a habit and I'm not even the slightest bit interested. From what I'm thinking, she's interested in general. She's interested in you, your friend, that kid next door, the cute substitute teacher, whatever. She's not slutty she's just a girl. We eye guys like possible suiters, possible boyfriends or for some, hookup opportunities. if we do find that ONE guy we forget all the others instantly and because as vulnerable as eve r. we are changed completely and ALL our energy goes towards that one guy. If she's being flakey and indecisive its because she's stilll in the "generally interested with all" stage. doesn't mean your not special it just means she doesn't want to put all her eggs in one basket, you know what I mean?

    • Yea I get what ur saying. Usually for me if a girl turns down my offer more then once, I'm done and move on. I guess I haven't asked her out on a date the three times I first wanted to hangout with her and my friends and get to know her better outside of class. I don't know if that messed things up and left some mixed signals, but I think I'm just going to be blunt and ask her what she wants, tell her I'm interested in getting to knw her better. C where it goes frm there that way I knw where we stand.

    • You're a terrible person. lol.

    • Steph this is the best answer I ever read.u got the point that most can't describe it exactly.wooow steph.this happened to me :((

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • hmm. she seems to like you from everything in the beginning, but maybe there's two reasons:

    she's not sure if you actually like her romantically either and/or gets too nervous to be with you alone or outside of a school setting.

    or she could be flirty and not even realize what she's doing to you.

    therefore the whole friend thing could mean three things: she likes you and thinks she doesn't have a chance.

    she's trying to make you jealous.

    she's not into you like that and is just a flirt.

    i'm sorry, dude. I'm kinda going through the same thing with some guy right now, so I definitely feel your confusion and frustration. makes you either want to just give up or walk up to them and shake the shit out of them screaming "WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?!"

    i wouldn't suggest you do the latter tho. makes you look crazy and nobody wants that.

    • Yea I'm not even sure which point is her. The whole askin about my friend though is the one thing that bothers me the most. Oh and canceling on me not a fan of that but hey I guess either way I'll come out learning something from this situation. I'm just going to ask her what she wants, tell her I'm interested in gettin to know her better outside of class.

    • I feel the same way about a girl I like as well.

  • Well I took the time to read this so I might as well answer this question.

    I think she is interested in you.

    i mean canceling plans seems like the main reason you are contridicting yourself,

    & When I'm intereted in guys, I sometimes do this because I get nervous at the last minutes.

    So don't take it personally.

    • Yea I guess b4 I used to take that sayin that there never to busy for someone that their interested in. Thanks for taken the time to read it though sorry it was long ha.

  • I would say for the first part all the things that she is doing is a clue that she likes you. I think she likes you she is just nervous about the whole being alone and going on a date. Afraid that she will do something wrong to make you not want to go on another date with her again.

    Asking about the friend, either she is trying to make you jealous or she actually likes him and it may very well be that she likes you both. I would ask her out again and if she does the same thing she has been doing I would ask her why she keeps canceling if she likes you so much. if she really does like you she will find a way to hang out with you no doubt. If she keeps canceling I would move on. its the best you can do because you can't wait around for her forever.

    • Yea I'm going to ask her what she wants, tell her that I'm interested in gettin to know her better. The thing was I never asked her on a date, just invited her to a partys. I wanted to get to know her in environment wit her friends and mine. Just to see how she was outside of class.

What Guys Said 2

  • She's definitely interested in you. Seriously just be straight with her that you don't tolerate flakiness and if its her making a fool of herself when you are alone then ask some of your best guy friends to set up a group date so its less intimidating. If she still is hesitating then go back to the drawing board, but if it becomes a repetitive scenario, cut her lose. It will just show you that if she's not confident about herself, what makes you so sure that you won't turn out to be her crutch in the relationship. Ideally you want a strong and confident partner who can hold her own at times but not all the time, good luck.

    • Yea I get what ur saying, I normally drop this after the first couple of times on cancellations. But the constant glances and other signs jst keeps me there and it doesn't help that we have class together. It bothers me cause she shows me more attention then I do her, so the whole tease concept doesn't make sense cause I have friends in that class and I strted to tlk to them more then I did her and she still acted the same way. Confusing man confusing.

  • maybe she likes u. but she's not sure yet?

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