How do I learn to maintain eye contact and smile?

So I have a problem where I have a lot of trouble maintaining eye contact with a person that I am speaking to, it seems really intimidating and awkward for me, so I look around and focus on their nose, but I feel as though I should learn to actually look at the person, it maks conversation more meangingful. so how do I stop getting so shy and intimidated?

Also, I have a small crooked tooth next to a slightly larger tooth on one side so I don't smile because I think the smile looks ugly, but I want to :/

so no eyecontact plus no smiling, just makes me look like an intimidating person :/ How do I overcome this?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I didn't get braces until half way through college so I know exactly how you feel. Having said that I understand what you mean with having a difficult time holding eye contact, especially when someone is speaking to you up close and they are REALLY staring at you hehe. I'm a guy so I think it is easier for me to hold my stare. After I got my braces (my teeth look nearly perfect) I noticed that smiling plays a HUGE part in being able to hold someones stare. There's just something about smiling and letting all your teeth show that people really react to it (positively).

    The best technique is to be relaxed when you are staring directly into someones eyes instead of focusing into their eyes, and having to think about holding the stare, just let your eyes slowly move to meet theirs and lock onto them, relaxed, smiling helps with relaxation.

    After a while you should become really good at it and you can even play around with people that way. Like smiling at total strangers to see how they will react, and holding your stare. Hehe

    • I am actually in my 2nd year of college and I am yet to get braces and I am terrified, I have trouble holding a smile as is...ahah I'm just ogin to become invisible because nobody will notice a shy no eye contact no smile person :L

      I do that soemtimes, I smile at strangers but it looks really tight lipped and forced becuase I hate showing teeth but your riht I should probably relax!

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What Guys Said 7

  • Imagine someone you know from real life or the movies, with messed up teeth, but tons of confidence. The next time you are smiling, you'll feel more like them, relaxed, carefree, without the need to appear perfect.

    People care about who you are, not about how your smile looks.

    I'd say you won't have a problem with your appearance as much any more. The conversation is the important part, and you know that. That's also the key to looking someone in the eye. Think about what they're saying, instead of where your eyes are gazing. Looking them in the eye is actually incidental.

    When you are paying attention to the message and repeating back what you've heard your eyes will naturally meet theirs.

    • ahah I know what you mean on focussing ont he covnersation, I was on this date the other day and the netire time the guy was staring, right into my eyes and I was trying to look back but it just made it really awkward and I couldn't focus ont eh conversation ebcause I was trying so hard to focus on not looking elsewhere

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    • hahah I will keep tht in mind :L

    • You're getting very relaxed, almost sleepy, and in few seconds you'll be twice as relaxed as you've ever been. Now, when will you cluck like a chicken after you hear the word "meatloaf"? When you hear the word meatloaf it will be wonderful to cluck like a chicken...

      I have way too much time on my hands.

      Oh yeah, you'll wake now - 3, 2, 1... Meatloaf!

  • Just constantly practice and practice. Talk a lot with your family, friends, classmates, and co-workers. Here's some tips. If you're tired/get uncomfortable looking at their eyes, look at the middle area between their eyes. Talking with a lot of people and applying this tip can give you a dramatic increase in "performance."

    And about the teeth, we, guys, don't usually notice those small details.

    Also, a lot of guys just wants to stare at the eyes and boobs, nothing else matters.

    • haha thanks for that! I think I do need practice :/

  • And eyecontact with no smiling makes you even more intimidating ha ha :D

    So practise being intimidating and then progressively add smiling into the picture :)

  • it's normal,you should focus more on conversation, so you don't feel akwkard

  • Watch the movie, Get Shorty, and take tips from John Travolta.

  • When I look at someone while they're talking, I look at their nose while making it look like I'm looking at their eyes. This is so that it doesn't make like I'm staring at them..besides, I get intimidated when people stare directly at my eyes, it's a little annoying

    If that's you in your picture, you're hot

    • ow I understansd that feeling, its reallt intimidating to be looking at anybody straight in the eye.

      but ahah thanks for the compliment ?

  • oh I know I know OK 1.u need to go to acting school if you haven't known how to keep attitude in social ...but I say first make your self comfortable that you look good when smiling or talking or having conversation ,go check in mirror & do some expressions trying to talk ,smiling then as usual you will be cool ...


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