I'm not what he wants... So why does he stick around?

He likes (more like loves) Asian girls. I'm black. He likes diet & fitness and slim girls. I have more to love, and not in a big rush to get rid of all of it. He likes girls with fun, bubbly personalities and confidence. I don't have that; in fact, I'm the complete opposite.

I mean, he compliments me (quite often). He listens when something's wrong or I have a bad day (and usually cheers me up). But he occasionally tells me how he wants me to exercise more. Once, he told me that he couldn't wait for warmer weather so that he could see me in a bikini (I don't even wear one-pieces.) I told him that there would surely be better-looking girls in bikinis, and that if he wanted to leave, I would understand. He insists that that isn't what he wants.

There are plenty of other girls who have everything he wants that I don't. He could have his pick of any of them, but he chose me.

So why does he stick around?

Thank you both! You're right; if he wanted to leave, he would. I'm going to try to start having more confidence. He's going to like that. I've been very insecure for the entire duration (6 months). I'm still a little nervous, but I'm working on it.
I asked another question about him, because something just wasn't sitting right with me. You can read it, if anyone wants more details...


Most Helpful Girl

  • You've already answered your question...he picked you, that's why he sticks around. If he didn't want to be with you he wouldn't be. I know how hard it is to figure out why someone is with you, especially if you have low confidence. But you are going to drive him away if you keep telling him your not good enough. Take comfort in the fact that he could be with a girl that can fit in a bikini, is asian, and completly his type...but picked you. There must me something special if he picked you. Its hard when you are young to realize this but love is blind. My fiance wants me to lose weight and be healthy too...but he is going to love me no matter if I'm skinny as a rail, or as big as a bus. Don't worry so much and just be you, that's when the person we are with loves us the most!

    • I'm speechless.


    • But in a good way...

      What you said just made so much sense!

      (BTW, welcome to GAG!)

    • Lol, well I speak from experience. My finace (in my mind) can do soo much better. But he picked me. When we started going out I was just like you, I doubted his wanting to be with me becuase I felt like I didn't fit his criteria. But he told me, he picked me. No need to wonder why, just know he loves me and that's all that matters. And since then I may not like the way I look, but I don't wonder or doubt him. Hope I helped!

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 0

Be the first guy to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!

What Girls Said 1

  • because you have an incomparable personality.

    I can say that " real love" is what he truly feels about you.

    don't compare yourself to anyone because you have your own lovely personality...

    trust yourself girl...

    • Oh, no... he's not in "love". He told me that he wasn't looking for love in our relationship. He just wanted to take whatever came our way and see where it led. (We're not typical a boyfriend/girlfriend lol) I think we're doing pretty well though.

      Thanks for your answer! :D

    • Actually, I think we're more like FWB than BF/GF.