Don't let the good times from the past hold you hostage in future.
It's hard, but sometimes, it really is best to part and walk your separate ways.
I had such an episode. And it just got uglier because we both kept trying to get back together but our differences had surfaced and cemented such that we dwelled upon them. We could not possibly get ourselves to get along. Every word was like a bullet you know? The desperation to feel good again wasn't enough to get us back together. We had grown to be people not meant for one another.
It took me around a year to move on from a 4 year relationship. Although now I can safely say I feel as if I've completely moved on, on account of the time I spent with this person, it's inevitable that references from our past keep resurfacing through pictures, music, conversations, events, people etc. It's natural. But I know it holds you back. Time is a healer!
You want to prevent your arbitrary, unsettled emotions from overriding your rational thinking. Looking back at myself when I was going through a similar 'after-math' phase like yours, I can't believe some of the stupid things I did out of desperation and confusion. You can't resume a relationship with him now even if it's the right thing to do. You don't want to question yourself through this time. That's what it does to you. You keep wondering all the time if you're doing the right thing. And end up doing stupid things in the interim. I went on this psycho phase looking out for the slightest thing, sometimes imagining things that could possibly mean I had made a mistake. This was true when I was away, AND when I tried to be with her again.
YOU need to put things in perspective first. That's the idea.
So this is what I say: Give yourself time. Let him know. He MUST respect that. You're a person and you have feelings. If he still doesn't respect your life and decisions, or you see things in him you don't approve of, if later in future you have lost interest and found better things, accept the end of this relationship once and for all and never look back again.
Right now. Get your life back on track and shut everything 'him' out. This will only deteriorate your condition. Don't let it be this way and don't allow yourself to be a wreck darting from one end of ambivalence to the other.
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yes, it's the best thing. Moving on and not expecting you to get back together is the best thing. Then you guys might actually have a chance later on, to actually becoming friends. I'm still friends with most of my exes. Simply because we cut contact, and learned to move on.
it depends on why he broke up with you or why you broke up with him. If he cheated on you or disrespected you then don't. If you did something similar and he still want's you back you should consider you lucky. But if he cheated on you would you want him back? Just think about what is best for both of you. It could be the best for both of you to cut out all contact or it could kill you. It is your own individual choice what you do.
cut him off, it will be easier to move on and find a better person.
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Yes, stay away from ex.
Most of the time it is the right thing to do
stop talking to him
yes, it is
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