Older guys, what advice would you have for young men and dating?

I feel like everyone my age (24) are falling in love and getting married, and there's a lot of pressure for myself to follow suit from family and friends. I'm a good looking guy, tall, fit, smart, and kind, but my major shortcoming is probably confidence and being outgoing. I'm more the quiet, nerdy type at heart. I was wondering if any older guys went through a similar experience (girls opinions welcome as well), and what their advice would be. My gut instinct is telling me to just relax, take life as it comes, and that you cannot rush a successful relationship. I think if you can be happy by yourself, then you can be happy in a relationship, without needing someone to make it so. I'd love to learn from your advice or mistakes, in order to make the most of my twenties. Or, would you recommend I start really looking for a wife, like my friends have said?


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  • I would say that you shouldn't be looking for a wife. If you know you've low confidence and a poor dating history, you're very likely to panic-buy and marry the first girl who will have you, instead of picking a good match with a high probability of happiness and success.

    Working on your confidence is not hard. There are many websites devoted to helping you build self-confidence, several are free. They do work, if you put the effort in. They take about 6 months to complete. Work on that, and then get some practice dating. Getting married in your 30's is not weird and you'd still be young enough to play with your kids.

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