No one to talk To about this?

Married nearly 17 years we have two children in there teens. He never gives me any effection or emotion , we hardly ever have sex.. To be honest I don't fancy him , we never kiss only little peks ! If I ask him to just touch my leg to make me feel comfort he would moan and say stop bossing :( I'm not !! I feel so empty I'm a very caring passionate person. I met a lovely guy online he has a gf , ok it's bad but we met !! Yes we have had sex it was so passionate I felt alive , loved touching feeling wanted , needed , I'm a pleaser and so is he we connect so beautifully I think the world of thos other man and so does he about me , he messages me every day all
Day we tell each other everything he listens he cares , unlike my husband he doesn't seem to be bothered. I feel like I'm here to just make him look good to his family and friends !! Feels fake , thos other man cares so much he makes me feel so wanted he's a good friend to me we can never be together obviously but it's nice. I'm in tears writing this Im
So alone no one to talk to , what should I do? Can't hurt my husband but if it wasn't for this other man in my life I would be back to being depressed like I was before :( what should I do?


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You should leave your husband.

    Look, I'm not saying tell him you cheated on him because I promise you this: You're both doing this. Neither of you loves one another. Looking at the age range the oldest you could have married and stayed within that range or very close is 16-18 and people change a lot and different stages of life are gone through and you grow up.

    You need something he is not and HE needs something you are not either; you're bad for one another. It's one of those conversations you have calmly because everyone knows it, it's just hushed, but neither of you likes one another anymore and really everyone is waiting for the other to finally just come out and say it.

    Do not confess cheating on him NOR are you to try and get a confession of the same or anything like that; just try to end it peacefully. No arguments or anything like that are necessary and it's not as big a deal really as anything else. No one is getting their needs met and it's just mutual dissolution.

    • I have tried to leave last year but he wouldn't let me go , he emotionally drowned me even went into hospital with chest pains he made me feel bad so I took him back , don't get me wrong he's good he pays the bills gives us money looks after us and I no this will seem strange but it's like he's more of a father to me :/ and no my husband who I shoukd be deeply in love with ! I do care for him but it's like friends nothing else I don't fancy him at all

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    • Yes that's how it seems the other man is giving me attention everyday where my husband is giving me none of that. I will just need to stay in this marriage for my children's sake I can't ruin everything because of my needs

    • Thank you for the advice x

What Girls Said 1

  • I think the best thing to do is to talk to him and try to work out what went wrong, you should try to work things out, your kids are in they teen years and they will need you, so do the right thing by sorting and finding what went wrong in your marriage but if it doesn't work out, at least u did what u can do, then go with the other guy and if u go with the other guy, u still have to be there for ur teens!!.

    • This other guy doesn't no I'm married he has a gf we just connect so well he's always there for me. My husband is a good man but very emotionally detached , This is so mixed up I'm so confused

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    • When I met my husband it wasn't love it was a fun night out I ended up pregnant he then asked me to marry him etc and here I am today

    • Whoo, but u said yes because u were pregnant, u married him cuz of were pregnant and u both had a fun night once and he got u pregnant and he got u pregnant again, even though u do or dont love this man, u can try love him (To say yes to "Will u marry me" u must have a little connection) it not good to look at the past and feel depress he might not be the "Mr right" for u but u might be "Mrs right" for him.